Urbania Page #6

You're not going to forget

my buddy, are you?

Hey, charlie,

come on over here

and tell me

what your bud likes.

Don't mind us.

Hey, holy sh*t, I know you.

You're my high school

biology teacher.

Look at you, Don Wagner,

don't you look scary tonight.

Hey, come on, I'm not going

to tell anyone!

Sorry.

He's a dick.

We're going over

to The Lure if you...

No, thanks.

Oh come on, Don,

come back!

You got a car?

- Yeah, if I can find it.

- Come on.

# You take me back to the place

where I cease to exist #

# To find a kiss #

# Something I missed #

# You burn away my disguise

and galaxies fall #

# Because of this #

# Because of this #

I remember this quilt.

I remember waking up

drooling on this quilt.

It's one of my fonder memories,

actually,

just sleeping together,

with you.

I like it up there.

It gives me peace.

Good.

That's good for you.

How are you liking it here?

It's fine.

It's a nice place.

Very white, like you.

- A vision.

- Charlie...

Hey, I've been good.

I've stayed away.

Welcome Wagon.

This is nice.

It's 4:
00 in the morning.

And you're looking

a little gamey.

Did you set

your clock back?

You get an extra hour.

Thanks.

So it's not as late

as you think.

Yes, it is.

It's been

old home week tonight.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

I saw one

of our friends tonight.

What?

And this time

he was alone.

- Wake up, Dean.

- F***. I'm driving.

Uh uh.

Well I was driving.

Still sick?

Too much cuervo?

You taking me home, right?

- You don't know where I live.

- Don't worry, buddy.

I've got everything

under control.

- I can drive.

- Hear any good stories lately?

I don't feel...

Is that a "no"?

Let me see if I know any.

What?

I've got a good one.

And this one really happened,

I swear.

It's another example

of the universe saying,

"Just when you thought

you were safe,

wrong place, wrong time."

Just give me a second

to figure out the ending.

Where are you going?

I gotta pee.

You ever hear the one about

the guy named, um...?

The guy who hung out in the big

city with his buddies,

lurking around a certain kind

of urban nightlife?

- You know the kind.

- Charlie.

Listen.

One night

this guy was lurking.

And this night

in particular,

he's feeling

kind of blue

because his friends

had all deserted him.

So he's sitting in this bar

and next to him is this fellow,

not part of the urban nightlife,

not one of them.

This one is normal.

Guy has a new found pal.

So they talk and they drink.

The guy's already drunk.

He's been drunk since he was 13.

So he guzzles and guzzles

and he wakes up in a field...

Here's good.

You need f***ing

driving lessons, man.

...in a haze of tequila.

Whoa, baby.

...a daze of

white hot headlights.

Oh, sh*t.

Isn't this great,

just the two of us on the road,

being men together?

And then it

all becomes clear.

What the f***'s going on?

Things suddenly, horrifically,

fall into focus.

I'll show you, Dean.

I'll put it in a way

that you can understand.

Your new found pal

is one of them.

Your new found pal.

- Jesus, man!

- What I'm amazed at, Dean, is...

Look at me.

Nothing.

I know it's been five months,

but sh*t!

I'm your bud now, what the f***

are you talking about?

- Don't you? Really?

- No.

Let me clear your head

a bit for you.

What the f*** was I, Dean,

some one nighter to you?

Look, man...

You want me to f*** you?

You want me to f*** you,

you little c*nt?

Huh, you want me

to f*** you, c*nt?

- Is that what you want?

- No.

Chris...

You like that? Huh?

- Chris...

- Feel good to you?

You trying to scare me?

Is that what you're doing?

Jesus, did some...

something...

something happen to you?

What did you do?

I made him sorry

he ever laid eyes on us.

Jesus! F***!

Let me tell you though,

just last week,

I see you on the street,

this cock of the walk...

a black T-shirt,

black boots, black jeans,

and my head

in force of habit turns.

That body, that ass!

I just stood there admiring,

and then it turned,

and it was you.

There's nothing like drooling

over the f***er who...

F***.

I thought I missed

my chance,

that I was gonna go

my whole life...

but then I see you tonight.

Just you and me.

Make sure

that c*nt's watching.

- F***in' destiny.

- Get down. Get down!

Are you cold?

I had to warm you up.

I can get you heated up

in no time, Dean.

Take your

f***ing pants down.

- What?

- Take your f***ing pants off!

You f***ing f*ggot.

You f***in' little f*ggot!

F***in' p*ssy.

You get me f***ing drunk.

I expect you to put out!

What kind of

a date is this?

I'm going to cut your heart out,

you know that?

I've been there already, Dean.

Don't worry,

I haven't forgotten you.

You do good work.

Just so you'll always know

you're mine.

- I'm begging you.

- Yeah, that's the spirit.

Get up.

F*** you.

All right, you little f*ggot,

you want to see it so bad?

Fine.

Jesus f***ing christ,

Dean...

this is exciting to you?

F*** you!

What do you

want from me?

Get down. Get down!

Huh?

Why don't you lick my tit?

- What?

- Lick my tit, you f*ggot!

You like that?

Let's try a little lower.

There you go.

Oh, feel it.

See that?

The f***ing f*ggot.

I want you to know

you're mine.

Get down

on your f***ing knees.

Get down, Dean!

Open your mouth.

Let me see your tongue.

You want to give this

some head?

Does that feel all nice

in the back of your throat?

Or do you want the real thing,

is that it, Dean?

Is that what you want?

Dean?

Dean?

Dean?

Dean.

Chris.

Stop it!

Stop it!

Chris! No! Stop it!

Oh God.

Total eye for an eye.

It was positively biblical.

This happened?

The f***er was an epileptic,

so I put him out of his misery.

Bull sh*t.

You barge in here

4:
00 in the morning...

3:
00.

- With some bull sh*t story.

I know you.

Not anymore.

I'm an absolute sh*t.

- Congrats.

- People f*** with me,

I f*** with them.

That's it.

So you're the man now?

I can protect you, chris.

Thanks, but...

Look at me.

People mess with us,

they'll know.

I'd kill for you.

But you didn't, did you?

Did you?

No.

I know you.

- Tell me.

- What?

What did you f***ing do?

I had him up...

He didn't remember me,

but I had him.

I was gonna...

F***.

I was gonna...

I swear I was

gonna kill him,

or at least

f*** him up really bad.

I don't know.

It was just happening,

you know,

the way that night

happened to us.

Only this time,

we were on top.

And then he had that fit,

the f***er.

And I just thought about you,

and I couldn't...

There's no point in him

at what he did to us.

There was no point in me at what

I was going to do to him.

There's no f***ing point.

Hey.

Well...

it's nice to know you've

embraced the healing process.

But first we'll need

a better story.

The beginning, middle, dead.

Everyone will be talking about us.

And you know that it was true.

We'd be the stuff of legend.

Nice try, babe.

It would have made it all

worth while.

Almost.

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