Wag the Dog Page #12

MOSS:

(CONT)

You know, if we're gonna run with the kitten, maybe it

turns out, the Kitten has a Name, and...

DIRECTOR:

We ready out there...?

BREAN LOOKS DOWN AT HIS WATCH, AND TAPS AMES ON THE SHOULDER, AS HE EASES HIS

WAY PAST THE CONTROL CONSOLE.

AMES:

(ENGROSSED)

...one moment...

INT L.A.X. DAY.

A POSTER FILLS THE SCREEN. IT IS A NORMAL ROCKWELL SORT OF THING SHOWING

HAPPY AND PROUD AMERICANS OUTSIDE OF A VOTING BOOTH. AND IT READS: "DON'T

FORGET TO VOTE. NOVEMBER 2ND. IT'S YOUR DUTY -- IT'S YOUR RIGHT."

PRESIDENT'S VOICE

(VO)

...a state of War.

(PAUSE)

That a State of War...

PAN OFF THE POSTER TO SHOW THE GATE AREA, MANY PEOPLE WAITING, WATCHING A

TELEVISION SET, ON WHICH WE SEE THE PRESIDENT.

PRESIDENT:

(CONT.)

...exists...

A TELEVISION SET, THE PRESIDENT ON THE TELEVISION.

PRESIDENT:

...between the United States and Republic of Albania,

and that the Congress Authorize any and all measures

consonant with a swift and painless, and victorious

conclusion of that War.

ANGLE:

BUSINESS PEOPLE QUEUING UP, AT THE TV, BEYOND THEM, THE DEPARTURE GATE,

SHOWING A SIGN, AMERICAN AIRLINES FLIGHT _____ TO WASHINGTON D.C.

IN THE FOREGROUND, BREAN, ON A CELLPHONE, PAYS NO ATTENTION TO THE SCREEN, AS

HE STANDS IN LINE.

BREAN:

(ON THE PHONE)

Go with a two-tone hat, I don't care, you work it out.

You, well, I'm sure you've had similar problems in the

past. Good. Good. Keep me ppp... Fine, I'll call you

from the plane.

THE TICKET TAKER, TAKING HIS TICKET, IS SHAKING HIS HEAD AT THE TELEVISION, ON

WHICH WE SEE AN ANNOUNCER/COMMENTATOR, DOING, "YOU HAVE JUST HEARD," ET.

CETERA.

TICKET TAKER:

Hell of a thing. Hell of a thing.

BREAN:

Innit?

TICKET TAKER:

Albanian Terrorists on the Canadian Border.

BREAN:

(ABOUT TO GET ONTO THE PLANE)

...makes you think.

IN THE B.G, WE SEE THE TELEVISION HAS GONE TO A COMMERCIAL, TWO BUSINESSMEN

TYPES, EACH PARKING HIS STATION WAGON IN HIS DRIVEWAY.

TYPE ONE:

Ed, what do you think?

TYPE TWO:

Bob, my mind wasn't one hundred percent made up, but

now it is:
I say: don't go changing Horses in

Midstream...

BREAN, HEARING THIS, WALKS BACK TO THE NOW DESERTED TELEVISION.

ANGLE:

FROM THE JETWAY THE DOOR ABOUT TO CLOSE, BREAN IN THE B.G. WATCHING THE

INFOMERCIAL. THE TICKET TAKER CALLS TO HIM, "...SIR...?" BREAN TURNS AND

RUSHES TO THE CLOSING DOOR. ON THE TV, IN THE BG, WE SEE THE LOGO: "RE-ELECT

THE PRESIDENT. THIS MESSAGE PAID FOR BY..." ET CETERA.

BREAN:

(INTO THE PHONE)

It's workmanlike, what can I tell you.... no, it ain't

going to help, but it won't hurt, cool down, see you in

Nashville.

HE FOLDS UP HIS PHONE AND WALKS ONTO THE PLANE, IN THE B.G. WE SEE SENATOR

NOLE, SPEAKING ON THE TELEVISION, THE REMAINING VIEWERS ARE DRIFTING AWAY.

SENATOR NOLE:

The issue of War, is, finally, an issue of Moral Fibre,

Moral Fibre. In my Platoon, in World War Two

BREAN:

(ON THE PHONE)

You have the number in D.C.? Good. What time

tonight... What...?

(BREAN TURNS TO THE TELEVISION)

BREAN COMES OVER TO AMES WHO IS ON THE PHONE, AND TALKING WITH LIZ BUTSKY, WHO

IS SHOWING HIM SOME SKETCHES.

LIZ:

...wanted to go with Roman Numerals... but there isn't

a Roman Numeral for Zero, so, you can't really do THREE

OH THREE, in Roman...

BREAN:

(TURNING TO AMES, OF NOLE)

Why is this putz on the air...

AMES:

... they're checking the ratings...uh...

LIZ:

...and I wanted to ask you if you thought it made sense

that the uniforms of the Freedom fighters were

starched.

(PAUSE)

I know that, traditionally,

(SHE FLIPS A CARD AND WE SEE THE

STARCHED UNIFORMED FREEDOM FIGHTER

DRAWN BY HER)

...they're torn, and so forth: days-in-the-mountains,

so on, but I thought...

BREAN:

(INTO THE PHONE)

Why am I seeing this guy on the News...?

(PAUSE)

What am I missing...? What are we forgetting?

AMES:

Well, at least we're not seeing the Girlscouts...

HE TURNS AROUND:

ANGLE, HIS POV.

A YOUNG DISHEVELLED COLLEGE STUDENT TYPE. HE WEARS A BUTTON ON HIS JACKET.

ANGLE INS:

THE BUTTON READS, "F*** ALBANIA"

ANGLE:

AMES AND BREAN.

AMES:

(OF THE BUTTON)

...is that "us"...?

BREAN AND LIZ BUTSKY SHAKE THEIR HEADS.

AMES JUMPS UP IN THE AIR AND YELLS "YAY."

SENATOR NOLE:

Especially in a time of war. Now:

We said that Moral fibre, not guns, not supplies, not

strategy, Moral...

COMMENTATOR:

(INTERRUPTING)

...Senator...?

SENATOR NOLE:

And this man, our President, in what I hope will be his

last days in that office, has proved himself empty and

devoid of...

A SMALL CHILD COMES OVER TO THE TELEVISION AND CHANGES THE CHANNEL.

INT DULLES AIRPORT ARRIVALS AREA, DUSK.

BREAN AND AMES COMING OFF OF THE PLANE, BREAN STOPS AT THE FREE PERIODICALS

DISPLAY. SAMPLE HEADLINES READ:

DEFENSE OF THE REALM: TERRORISM ALONG THE BORDER: THE PRESIDENT: ALL SPUNK:

CALL TO THE COLORS: DEFEND THE NORTH, ETC.

HE PICKS UP SEVERAL, AND CAMERA FOLLOWS HIM DOWN A HALL, PAST A HUGE POSTER

SHOWING OPPRESSED COMMUNIST HORDES, AND THE MOTTO "THEY DIDN'T HAVE THE

CHOICE, YOU DO. VOTE! IT'S YOUR RIGHT!"

ANGLE:

TIGHT ON BREAN AND AMES, AND A FELLOW PASSENGER, AS ALL SCAN THEIR NEWSPAPERS.

THE PASSENGER IS WAITING IN LINE TO USE A PAY PHONE.

BREAN:

(AS HE NUDGES AMES)

Can't find anything in here about the President and

that girlscout.

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