Waitress Page #2

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No... yes.

Sorry, anyway,

it's nice to meet you.

What's your name again?

I'm Dr. Jim Pomatter.

Okay.

- And you are?

- Jenna Hunterson.

Jenna Hunterson.

It is nice to meet you.

So... What seems to be the problem?

Well, I seem to be pregnant.

Good.

Good for you.

Congratulations.

Thanks, but I don't want this baby.

Oh, well, we don't perform... uh...

No, I'm keeping it,

I'm just telling you I'm

not so happy about it,

like everybody else might be.

So maybe you can be sensitive

and not congratulate me

and make a big deal

every time you see me.

I'm having the baby,

and that's that.

It's not a party, though.

Got it, okay, not a party.

Uh, well, then, why don't we, um...

we'll have to do a blood test,

make sure you're pregnant

and then we'll check

for diseases, hormone levels,

stuff like that?

Sounds like a plan.

Okay, well, the nurse

will be right in.

Um... don't go anywhere.

Nowhere to go.

Come in.

Hi, Jenna, have a seat.

Okay, I'm going to give

you this pie now, Dr. Pomatter.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you very much.

Look at that.

You know what? Just push-push

all of those off onto the floor.

Go ahead, push them off.

That's fine. Just...

I'll get to those later.

Well, un-congratulations...

you're definitely having a baby.

Un-thank you.

So for the next eight months,

if you need me, I'm here.

If you have any questions,

just give a call.

We'll be doing some tests.

All of which I'll tell you

about before they happen.

And I'm going to give you

a prescription for,

uh, prenatal vitamins.

And do you have any,

uh, questions for me?

What kind of questions?

I don't know.

Concerns about your pregnancy?

Do's and don'ts?

Anything you're wondering about?

Exercise, sex...

I don't really do much

of either of those things, so...

Okay, any diet concerns?

Not really. I mean,

just eat healthy, right?

Eat healthy, um, avoid certain

cheeses, certain fish...

The receptionist, she can

give you a list of good and bad

foods for your pregnancy,

general do's and don'ts.

Okay.

And here is your prescription.

I'll just... sorry.

And, uh, it was very nice

to meet you, Jenna.

And I'll want to see you again

- in about three weeks.

- Okay.

Okay.

I do have one question.

Shoot.

How pregnant am I, exactly?

Very pregnant.

There's really only one degree

of pregnancy, so to speak.

No, I mean, uh, how far along am I?

Uh, about six weeks,

give or take.

Yeah, that was Earl getting me

drunk that night, all right.

You're late.

By six minutes. I'm sorry.

The bus was late.

Why doesn't your damn husband

buy you a car already?

'Cause he don't want

me goin' nowhere.

And you, late again.

You are inches away

from being fired, missy.

Oh, just try firing me,

you old bucket of cheese.

Who you calling a bucket

of cheese, you heifer?

Now get to work before

I fire your ass.

Calm down, you psychotic ape.

Hey, what are you doing?

Close the door!

How's the doc?

Fine, it was fine.

New doctor, a man.

A man, wow.

Is he single?

Maybe he's good for Dawn.

No, I think he was wearing a ring.

Weird guy, nervous.

From Connecticut.

Hey, honey, could you do me a favor?

What?

Old Joe just came in

and sat in my station.

Could you take him?

I can't deal with him today.

You're better with him than I am.

Yeah, sure, I'll take him.

Thanks, hon, you're a trooper.

Oh.

What? What's wrong?

You okay? You going to be sick?

I'm okay.

Just nauseous for a second.

Hurry up, let's get to work!

Hi, Joe.

How you doing today, my friend?

What can I get you?

This is my pie diner.

I own it.

I know you do, Joe.

And I think it's warm in here.

I know I'm warm.

I'll tell Cal, hon.

They keep all my businesses

too warm on the inside.

My gas station, my supermarket,

my Laundromat...

But this is my favorite business.

Joe's Pie Shop.

I'm Joe.

And I will not tolerate it being

too damn warm in here.

I hear you, Joe.

Turn the air on.

Yes, sirree, bub.

Okay.

I want two glasses of water, no ice.

Two glasses, no problem.

- Two glasses.

- Right.

No ice.

And I want the "Bad Baby Quiche Pie"

with tomato on the side,

on its own plate.

No potatoes with that?

Did I say anything about potatoes?

Where'd you get potatoes from?

No potatoes, tomato.

On its own plate.

Salt and pepper.

That everything?

No.

I want orange juice.

But don't bring that first.

Bring the water first.

Bring the orange juice

with the meal.

Okay, listen to my horoscope

before you skedaddle away.

"Aquarius...

Smooth sailing today as Mars

enters your inner circle. "

Whatever the hell that means.

"The ones you love will listen

carefully to you today,

just make sure you're careful

with what you say. "

Hmm.

I don't have ones I love.

Want to hear yours?

Uh, I'm Aquarius, too, hon.

I don't have ones I love either.

Just ones I live with.

Excuse me, I feel like

I'm going to be sick.

You okay, sweetie?

Yeah, I'm okay.

Good. Listen, um, I have

a five-minute blind date tonight

with an insurance

salesman named Pete.

Five foot 10, 37,

all his hair, nice picture,

- loves fishing.

- Five-minute date?

Can't the guy pay for

the whole thing?

Yeah, see, um, I have this idea.

I'm meeting men through

personal ads,

but I just give them five minutes.

Whether or not we

like each other,

- we just have five minutes together.

- Huh.

That way, you know,

if the guy makes me sick,

I don't waste a whole evening.

Anyway, I'm supposed

to meet this guy at

7:
00 at Banshee's.

I was wondering if you would

do a full makeup for me

here in the bathroom,

before I leave?

A full makeup for five minutes?

Well, yeah, it's very important

to make a good first impression.

I mean, wh-what if he's

Prince Charming?

There is no such thing.

Whatever.

Will you do that for me?

Yeah, of course.

Oh, would you also make me

your "Falling In Love

Chocolate Mousse Pie"?

That is my favorite pie.

What the heck, I'll do

it during my break, okay?

You are the queen

of kindness and goodness.

You with child?

Shh, quiet.

I've seen that look on

a woman's face before.

Name was Annette.

I made sweet love to her

all through the summer

of 1948.

She got that sick look

on her face like you had

all through the fall.

I almost married her right up.

She lost the baby, though.

Close call.

When you due?

Shh, Joe...

Don't want Cal to hear.

You can't lose my job.

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