Walking and Talking Page #7

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- Hey! Hey!

- [Laughing]

- Oh, it's cold!

- Agh!

Ooh, it feels great.

[Panting]

Aaah.

- It's cold.

- Oh, look at the moon.

- Oh.

- [Howls]

- [Howls]

- Oh, so many stars.

We don't have any stars

in New York. We should

be able to see stars.

- Yeah. Yeah.

- Sometimes.

[Blowing Bubbles]

- So did your phone

ever get cut off?

- No.

I got that, uh, paid.

So... taken care of.

[People Conversing Quietly]

[Continues]

[Amelia]

What's goin'on?

What happened?

- [Woman]

I've seen this cat.

- Oh, my God!

[Man]

It's probably her cat.

[Woman]

It must be her cat.

[Sobbing]

Big Jeans! Oh, God.

I'm sorry. He fell...

He fell out of the window.

I know, I know.

Somebody call 911. Betsy?

- What happened?

- He fell. He fell out

of the window, and it's over.

[Kind Woman]

To be honest with you,

Bobo was my best friend.

- I mean, I'm not kidding.

For 18 years.

- Mmm. They listen.

- They do.

- Sweet little angels.

Never let you down.

Always there for you.

Never asking for

anything for themselves.

[Laura, Frank On Machine]

Hi, we're not here.

So leave a message. Bye.

- I thought of her more as a person.

- Ah.

Never should have let her

go out on the windowsill.

You let her go out

on the windowsill?

- She liked it.

- Of course she did.

I don't want you to worry,

because we are not gonna leave...

until you feel better.

That's okay, really. I don't

think I'm gonna be feeling

better for quite some time.

- We won't budge.

- I'm free for the rest

of the afternoon, so...

Actually, you know...

[Sighs]

I... I'm feeling better. Isn't that...

Isn't that odd?

- Hi.

- Hi.

Sorry I haven't

called you back.

- Can I talk to you?

- W... Yeah. Yeah.

Of course you can.

Come in. Sure.

Sit down.

- Is that my shirt?

- Oh. Yeah. Here.

Is this the way you return

things you borrow? I mean,

do you do this on purpose...

to get me mad or something?

Dry-clean it.

- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

- It's not... No.

Um, Laura. Big Jeans, uh...

Big Jeans is dead.

She jumped out the window.

What?

God. Why didn't you

call me?

I did. I just...

I didn't want to leave it

on your machine.

It's all my fault, you know.

I... I let her out on the windowsill.

And, uh...

And the chemo, radiation

must've made her weak.

I mean, you were right.

I never should have

put her through that.

Don't be crazy.

She fell.

Besides, you said

she was getting better.

She wasn't.

She wasn't.

You don't know. I mean,

you hardly ever saw her.

[Sighs]

I have a life, Amelia.

I have a life.

I know you have a life.

What was I supposed to do?

Just not move out, so you and I

could live with our cat...

for the rest of our lives?

Jesus, things change.

I had her cremated.

I have a lot

of work to do.

I know. Hey.

I'm so sorry about Big Jeans.

I really am.

- Thanks.

- I have a problem.

I need your help.

The girl from California...

she's here.

- So? So what?

What am I gonna do?

- Actually, I've worked that out.

You see, I'm supposed

to meet her downstairs

for lunch in 15 minutes.

I was thinking you could come

with me, you know, and I could

introduce you as my girlfriend.

You know, like we got back

together or something.

The actual details of that

aren't as important as...

Andrew, there is no way I'm

gonna do that to that girl. Why

don't you tell her the truth?

[Scoffs]

I can't. I can't.

She wants...

She wants to stay with me.

She thinks, like, we're gonna

have a relationship or something.

Gee, I wonder why

she thought that.

Look. Are you gonna

help me or not?

- Not! I'm staying right here.

- Please, please.

Come on, Amelia.

It's not that big a deal. She's nice.

I don't wanna hurt her feelings.

I just feel like...

You should have thought

of that before, Andrew. Good luck.

[No Audible Dialogue]

I wanna talk to you about something.

I really feel bad about this.

I never really

saw any devils.

I'm sorry.

You can fire me if you want to.

Why did you tell me

you saw devils if you didn't?

Because my problems are stupid,

and I... I know I gotta

be really crazy...

to come and see you for free,

so I made the stuff up

about the devils.

I figured that's what a real

wacko would say. Right?

- Hi.

- Hi.

[Sighs]

[Sighs]

- This is crazy.

- Yeah.

- I miss you.

- I miss you too.

[Chuckles]

I got something for you.

You do? Now?

Yeah.

Oh, Frank, I don't

deserve a present.

No, no. You deserve it.

It's kind of personal.

I think you'll like it.

Open it up.

What is this?

[Snickering]

Is this your mole?

This is your mole.

You gave me

your f***ing mole.

I had it removed

and biopsied.

And, uh, I'm fine.

I'm fine.

- Are you relieved?

- So you gave it to me in a box?

Yeah, it's great, isn't it?

It's funny. I thought

you'd like it. It's a joke.

No, it's not a joke.

It's the most passive-aggressive

thing you've ever done.

Oh, come on.

You don't think that's funny?

No, I don't think it's funny, Frank!

I think it's disgusting.

I thought we were here

to try and talk.

Okay. Fine.

Give me back my mole.

- Oh, now you want it back?

- Yeah. I want it back.

- You want your mole back?

- Yes, give me back my mole!

Gladly.

- So, how are you?

- I'm good.

I'm real good.

Bill, I feel really bad

about what happened.

I liked you. I wanted

to see you again.

Well, you know.

It worked out for the best.

I got back together

with my old girlfriend.

Oh.

- That's good.

- Yeah. We're gonna go watch

dwarf bowling tonight.

Her father

got us tickets.

- Dwarfs bowling?

- No. It's like, uh...

No. People bowl

with dwarfs.

Like, they pick 'em up and

use 'em as bowling balls. It's great.

- That's sick.

- No, no, no. The dwarfs like it.

I've seen it before.

My girlfriend's really into it.

You checkin' these out?

Yeah.

Hey. You're early.

- I got you something.

- What?

You wouldn't believe

the humiliation I had to

withstand to rent them.

- I got them from Bill.

- You saw Bill?

- Yeah.

- I've seen these.

- F*** you.

- I'll see 'em again! They're good.

So tell me what happened

with Virginia.

It was awful. I didn't

even remember what she

really looked like.

Not that she was ugly

or anything. Just...

You know, not

what I was picturing.

What were you picturing?

I don't know.

Nothing.

Nobody, I guess.

I told her the truth,

though. I told her that

an in-person relationship...

was more than I could

handle right now.

Which isn't really the truth,

but she bought it.

[Chuckles]

God, she must have been pissed.

As she was leaving,

I said, "I'll call you. "

Oh, my God.

I am such an a**hole.

I'm gonna write her a letter.

I feel really bad.

Hey... Mmm.

- Andrew.

- Hmm?

I still have

the black pants.

What black pants?

The black pants.

The black pants I bought you

that made you panic

and break up with me.

God.

What are you

talking about?

- [Laughing]

- I asked for these? They don't fit!

I'm getting fat.

When did you buy these?

If they fit back then,

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