Ways to Live Forever Page #2
She left her job when I got sick.
Now she takes Sundays off to go
and sing in the church choir.
I don't go because I hate people
pretending they're worried about me.
because she loves everybody
fussing over her.
Dad never goes.
He doesn't like talking
about my illness.
Dad is really clever,
of my questions.
the subject, Dad just coughs
or simply says We're not going
to talk about that.
We're home.
Look how quiet you two are.
What's that Sam?
Homework.
You've got lots of homework
all the sudden, haven't you?
He's been writing all morning.
If he's putting that much effort
into your homework, don't you think
it's time to go back to school?
That poor woman has been
coming here long enough.
I like Mrs. Willis.
I don't want to go back to school.
The kids all stare at me and ask
how sick I really am
and how come I get to go home
when I'm tired.
It's ridiculous.
Anyone can see
Sam is much better now.
It's silly to keep him cooped
up here with nothing to do.
I've got lots of things to do.
Dad, don't.
I'm fine here.
Daniel, don't start all that again.
Not in front of the kids.
because they're not giving me
chemotherapy anymore.
Mum, what's the matter?
if I behaved like a normal kid.
Doctors can get things wrong.
Look at Sam. Just look at...
Sam!
Set down.
I hate nose bleed.
I hate them.
I hate everybody fussing.
passing tissues to Mum.
Mum telling me what to do like
I don't know already.
And Dad not moving,
just standing there looking at me
with that odd look on his face...
as if I was an alien...
Sam!
Sam!
Sam!
Annie Dracula!
You can leave it at Dracula.
Annie isn't really a vampire.
We call her that because
she deals in blood.
What have you been up to then?
What was I meant to say?
and record a video.
I launched a rocket.
Dad thinks I'm well again.
Nothing.
That's it done.
For now, pirate, you've got
to take things easy.
This is a catheter.
They use it to take blood
from me and they inject
stuff in through it.
Right now they're giving me platelets.
It's a pain,
because it's always there
This is my IV stand.
Actually, I'm not tied to it,
it just looks like that.
The platelets are hooked up to it,
they come down this tube
to the catheter and they give them
to me when I've had a hemorrhage...
that's all you can say
about the subject really.
Things that I want to do before I die.
It's wonderful.
It's freezing.
Alright. So let's make a list of things
we'd like to do.
A list of wishes.
Then we'll put them in this bottle
and throw it into the sea.
So. I'll go first.
One, go to the Grand Canyon.
Two, clean out the attic.
Three learn how to make meringues,
and four, train the dog.
Train the dog?
What kind of a wish is that?
You don't know our dog.
Your turn, Felix.
Be rich and famous, nuke all doctors,
see Arabian in concert.
You've already seen Arabian in concert.
Your brother took you.
Sam.
Be a famous scientist,
find things out and write about them.
Watch all the 18 rated horror films
I'm not allowed to watch.
Go up down escalators.
Ride in an airship.
Be a teenager and drink,
smoke and have girlfriends...
Ella...
See a ghost, go up in a spaceship
and see the stars, break a world record...
Are you going to do all these things?
I don't know, probably not.
We could have a shot at them,
couldn't we?
They're not things to do really.
They're more like...wishes,
not real things.
So? Mrs. Willis is going
to make meringues, isn't she?
Why can't we watch horror films?
My brother's got tons in his room.
We can only really do two things
from this list.
Watch horror films
and go up down escalators.
All the rest is impossible.
Nothing is impossible for Felix Stranger.
We could smash a world record.
You can't go about smashing
world records, just like that.
On the 23rd of July 1999,
Ashram Fur man climbed
the Eiffel Tower's 1665 steps
with a pogo stick
and fifty seconds.
I love world records,
and Ashram Fur man is the guy
who has broken most of them:
216, including the world record
for the person to break
most world records.
My father told of this guy
who ate two hundred worms
in thirty seconds!
Let's do that one!
That's not a Guinness world record.
Felix, that guy advocate hundred worms.
We'll do it.
First of all, we'll try Oneida see
what they taste like,
then two hundred
and one din thirty seconds.
The smallest nightclub in the world.
2.4 x 2.4 x 1.2 metres.
We can beat that.
Anybody can build a nightclub.
What do you need?
Music?
And flashing lights, and drinks...
We can get all that.
And it has to be opend to the public.
It will be.
Let's get this place rocking!
I'm not surprised
we don't have any customers.
Even if it wasn't
it was enough for me to score Oneida
my wishes off my list...
Questions nobody answers number 2:
why does God make children get ill?
I'm here now.
Because God doesn't exist.
That's not a reason.
Of course it is.
Maybe he doesn't exist.
Write it down.
OK. Number two.
Number two.
He does exist,
but he's secretly evil.
He likes torturing kids for fun.
Number three.
God is like a big doctor.
so he can make them better people,
to make them less selfish.
Come on, Sam.
Today class is at Felix's house.
He doesn't care if you die,
because you just go to heaven
where he lives anyway.
That's a load of rubbish.
It's what my mum says.
How does cancer make you better?
Eh... I don't know,
you get all excited
about being able to ride your bike,
and your family is pleased.
If you're not ill,
you don't value stuff
like riding your bike.
That's the biggest load of crap
I ever heard!
teach you how great riding your bike is?
You can't put that down.
Well, it's there now.
Alright. Four, there's no reason.
Five, there is a reason,
but we're too stupid to understand it.
It's punishment for being bad.
It is not!
Why not?
That's what Buddhists say.
It's the karma for what you
did in your other lives.
We went through the whole class
without agreeing
about why kids have to die...
Felix repeated again and again
that we're already prefect,
too good for this earth,
that's why we have to go so soon.
When a Hindu dies, the family lights
the soul is all confused
when it leaves the body,
somewhere to live.
Pygmies don't like death.
When somebody dies, they demolish
the dead person's house...
and they never talk about
the person ever again.
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"Ways to Live Forever" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 18 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/ways_to_live_forever_23137>.
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