Welcome To The Jungle Page #2

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- Yeah.

- Yeah. So he'd be in his 60s now.

Yeah. Sixty-five, 7 0.

So, I think

the most popularly held belief...

is that he was captured

by ''cannibals'' and eaten.

No. That's just one of the beliefs.

I still think he's alive and kicking it.

They actually prefer the taste of meat...

that is still on the flesh

of a human that is living.

Oh. I would too.

They actually keep them alive.

They go limb by limb.

- Uh-huh?

- I've got good loin.

- [ Colby ] Be a shitty way to go.

- Yeah. If you're gonna eat something,

keep it fresh.

[ Colby ]

So, we gonna do this or what?

Look. We're all here. Right?

We're all having a good time. I don't know

why we have to pick up and move.

Hey, you know, this morning

when you were surfing with Colby...

Hey, you know, this morning

when you were surfing with Colby...

I decided to check Michael Rockefeller

out on the Internet.

just sounds a little crazy to me.

The Rockefeller family themselves

have already claimed his death.

Surviving 45 years out in the jungle?

I- I don't think so.

They have more money than us.

More manpower. More- More expertise.

More knowledge.

They hired the best anthropologists

from the best universities in the U.S.

Maybe- Maybe it's not that implausible,

you know. Maybe- Maybe he's still alive.

And even if he is,

who says he wants to be found?

I mean, there's- there's people that-

that live in really remote areas

for years and years.

Think about it. This guy was born

into the lap of privilege.

Maybe he didn't want to

belong to it anymore.

Maybe he wanted to pursue

something a lot more simple...

a lot more pure,

a lot more precious.

You know, each to his own.

Maybe he's still out there.

Maybe it's a mystery for a reason.

Who gives a sh*t

about Michael Rockefeller anymore?

A lot of people. He was one of

the biggest stories of the last century.

-It's one of the biggest stories of the last century.

-He was in Life magazine.

He was in Life magazine.

There was three television specials.

- Three television specials.

- There's, like, 1 0 books about him.

- Ten books.

- I think they're making a movie

in Hollywood right now.

They're making a movie about him

in Hollywood right now.

I guarantee you. We go there,

we find him, we film him, we interview him-

We can sell it to the tabloids

for at least a million bucks.

A million bucks?

We divide it four ways? What's that?

$250,000 would be kind of cool,

actually.

[ Sighs ]

I think our intentions

are completely out of whack.

I mean, what are we pursuing?

We're pursuing money.

You know, I could buy that gold

Trans Am I've always been after.

You know, the one with the-

with the eagle on the hood.

- I like it.

- Now let's take it for a test drive.

Well, my instincts say no, but, uh-

What does the crystal ball say, hmm?

Let's go to Papua New Guinea.

I'm in if you're in.

First off, we're in the South Pacific.

This is Australia.

This is Fiji.

And the island of New Guinea

has two parts:

- Papua New Guinea and Irian Jaya.

- Mm-hmm.

So one is independent,

and one is Indonesian control.

So we're gonna sail across

from Suva, Fiji...

to Port Moresby,

which is the port of entry.

So, from there we're gonna

drive across to the border...

to get to Irian Jaya.

[ Colby ] Now that we're

going on this trip together...

we have to ask each other

the five questions to truth.

- Rate your relationship

with your parents, one to five.

- Five.

- Three.

- One.

I don't consider myself

to have had parents.

- [ Mandi ] Do you think

you'll achieve your goals in life?

- If I make some.

- Yes.

- Definitely.

- Yeah.

- [ Bijou ] On an average Sunday afternoon...

do you prefer sobriety

or intoxication?

- Intoxication all the way.

- Sobriety.

- Sobriety.

- Intoxication.

[ Bijou ] Have you ever had a satisfactory

relationship with the opposite sex?

- Not yet.

- Yeah.

- Don't even try.

- No. Not even close.

- [ Mikey ] Do you believe in God?

- No.

No. Yes.

[ Chuckles ]

- Only if she's a woman.

- I believe that God is an excuse for weak people.

- Okay. We've got the mosquito repellant.

- [ Mandi ] Check.

- The sunscreen.

- Check.

- First aid.

- Check.

- Uh, poncho we're gonna need.

- Check.

- Where's the second camera?

- Here. Take this. Take this one.

It's, um-

It's, uh- Sh*t.

- Oh. Here. Here. Here. I got it. I got it. Got it.

- Okay.

We have to have this.

We need to put it in a plastic bag.

- Like waterproof it, right?

- Yeah.

- And don't forget to pack the G.P.S.

- Okay.

- God.

- [ Colby ] God. They're not done yet?

Hey! I am so excited!

- Mr. Colby.

- [ Colby ] Easy.

Welcome, guys.

- Hey. Hello.

- Bijou's working on the packing.

- In the meantime, I've prepared a few drinks.

- Oh, God.

- That's the bigger one. That'll be mine.

- We're leaving in the morning.

- And we will leave drunk.

- So we are getting an early.

- That's a brilliant game plan.

- Uh-

- More than brilliant. It's the only way to travel.

- The only way.

- Okay. All right.

- Down the hatch.

Guys, to alcoholic-fueled adventure.

[ All ]

To the journey!

Mmm! Mmm! Mmm! I'm carving

our initials. Come. Come. Come.

- [ Colby ] Jesus.

- What's your last name?

So, if he was taken by cannibals, I can't

understand why he hasn't been eaten yet.

- It's in the chapter before that.

- What? Where?

These guys-They're so isol-

They've never seen other races.

So they see a Caucasian or whatever,

they think these people are, like, sorcerers.

I mean, there's all kinds of stories

from World War II. These P.O.W.s.

Yeah. OneJapanese guy they kept alive

for, like, 1 5 years or something.

- [ Sighs ] How we doing, Captain?

- Yeah. We're going good.

Past Vanuatu,Tles Banks,

Santa Cruz Islands, Guadalcanal.

[ Colby ]

Come on, guys. Check it out.

- Port Moresby, Papua New Guinea.

- [ Bijou ] WhooI

- FinallyI

- [ Bijou ] Who's your papa?

[ Mikey Laughs ]

''Who's your papa?'' That's great.

[ Colby ]

I told you we'd get here safe, guys.

- That's right.

- [ Colby ] Look at this ugly mug.

We've made it. Ugly. This is the most

beautiful face you've ever seen.

And Bijou can attest to it.

And the most beautiful ass.

- judo chopI All right. Here.

- Give me this. Give me this.

- Enough filming for me.

Get these ships. Get these.

- [ Bijou ] MikeI

[ Ship Horn Blows ]

[ Colby ] Oh, there's my beautiful baby.

There she is.

- [ Mikey ] By the way, that is not a car.

- Mandi!

- That is horrible.

- Guys! Like our ride?

- Look.

- This is horrible.

- It's cool.

- Sport package.

All-wheel drive.

[ Mikey ] If we spent more than $200

budget on-on the-the ghetto van.

[ Bijou ]

Mikey, what do you say? Huh? Cool ride.

- Mikey, come check out the interior of this b*tch.

- I could've stolen a better car.

They play in skirts?

[ Mikey ] Wow. Look at this. The stadium's

packed. We gotta get in on this.

[ Colby ]

Wow.

Like the Port Moresby Coliseum.

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