Welcome to Willits

[static crackling]

[instrumental music

on TV]

Electric shavers,

blenders

toasters,

vacuum cleaners

stereo, power tools

even being available at Macy's,

Gimble's, Two Guys,

and any participating

hardware store near you.

That's the space vehicle

which orbited Venus

and then pur -- was

purposefully destroyed

by NASA

when scientists discovered

it was carrying

a mysterious

high-level radiation.

You been sneaking

that meth again, huh?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

- No, no, not me, man.

Stop, it's not worth it.

Why the hell

did you do that?

'Cause you wouldn't

let me shoot him.

A dark night of tyranny

has descended on..

[dramatic music]

[eerie music]

Peggy?

Peggy?

No.

I wanna go home.

[crying]

I'm not a bad guy.

I'm not a bad guy.

[intense music]

Please.

The f*** do you want

from me?

[growling]

[screaming]

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey, hey, hey. Hey.

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey.

Where? Where?

Where?

We're just

fuelin' up, hon.

Dip or smokes, sugar?

- Uh, both.

- Okay.

A sixer too, uh

and one -- one

of them little,

keg things.

Oh, hold on.

- How long was I gone?

- Oh, only a couple hours?

Okay.

Hey, I'm gonna, uh,

run inside

and -- and grab

a couple of things.

Hey, sweetie,

would you mind braggin'

grabbin' some,

some smokes

and -- and some booze

for Brock?

Whatever's cheapest.

He ain't picky.

Nothin' -- nothin'

imported.

Okay, sure.

You okay, sweetie?

[phone beeps]

Oh, geez, Peg.

I'm gonna plug this in

for ya.

- It's dyin'.

- Thanks, hon.

I don't know

why you have it.

You never charge it

a day in your life.

Well, that's why

I have you.

[instrumental music

on TV]

[door dings]

[indistinct chatter]

You guys get

what you need

I'm gonna gather some

last-minute provisions.

Oh, provisions?

[chuckles]

Affirmative, captain.

We shall procure

rations ASAP

as to avoid

future SNAFU.

You're a f***ing

douchebag, dude.

Huh, yeah.

I'm just making sure

we're stocked.

No need to ruin

a good trip.

Oh, and I just want

to pull that stick

out of your ass.

Hi, uh, n -- nice boots.

Uh-huh.

[laughing]

Thanks.

Nice blade.

Smith & Wesson?

Good eye, miss.

- Courtney.

- Courtney.

I, uh, I actually prefer

anything Kershaw makes.

I feel like, um,

S&W oughta just

stick to sidearms,

ya know?

Oh, okay, well, maybe

Jeremiah Jones

doesn't bring

his best steel out

in a Podunk town

like this.

Maybe I'm from this

Podunk town

and I don't need a tourist

telling me

what he sees fit

to bring in and out.

Wow.

Well, it just so happens

that I'm from

a few miles up north.

So, that makes me

an authority

on Podunkery.

Podunkery, yeah,

you must be

from somewhere

around here, handsome.

Handsome?

So you've never left

this area?

- No, not at all.

- No.

No, actually, um, I, uh,

I was just at school.

I just came back.

I'm gonna be staying

with family

until I get all settled.

Oh, Jeremiah Jones

stands corrected.

Does Jeremiah Jones

actually refer to himself

in the third person

all the time?

[laughing]

No. No.

No, but what I -- what I

do do is tend to, uh

get a bit goofy

and become an idiot

when I meet

a pretty girl.

[laughs]

Actually, um

if you wanna see

some real foolish idiots

you should, uh,

come down to the bar.

Where I work.

On Monday, maybe?

It's my first

shift back.

I could give you

a long pour

and you could fight off

the scumbags.

[whispering]

- Just go over there.

- What?

Just go that way.

I don't want you

to get in trouble.

Go.

- Klaus.

- What?

If you ask me,

Sasquatch was responsible

for them deaths.

Just says they're

missing. Doesn't say

they're dead.

You ever hear

of someone goin' missin'

in the woods, showin' up

two months later

roastin' marshmallows?

Sasquatch got 'em,

for sure.

[scoffs]

Unless you believe

in aliens.

Well, I do watch

all that

Discovery Channel

History Channel stuff,

so at this point

I'll pretty much believe

any hare-brained

explanation, am I right?

- Klaus.

- What?

Sorry, what I mean

to say is, uh

it's really nice

to hear it

from a legitimate,

first-hand source, hm?

You lose something

in there?

No, I was just checking

out the brand.

Um...cool bag.

Ever hear of karma?

No, um

it's, but it just

looked more

like, more expensive

from over there.

Here.

I won't deny the needy.

What?

What the sh*t's

that supposed to mean?

Pardon me.

Okay.

How ya doin', buddy?

You okay?

Is he bothering you?

Uh, nothin'

bothers me, man.

I've transcended that way

of thinking.

Okay.

You need a ride

somewhere or somethin'?

What? No.

Why?

Yeah.

Alright, cool.

Come on.

That's rude.

[eerie music]

No, no, now, don't go

hermit on me now.

No boys allowed,

no boys allowed.

Now, don't you start

boltin' up on me now.

Oh, no.

You're lookin' good.

Look at you.

Look at you.

Yeah.

Oh, you're comin'

along ni..

You got competition.

[distant howling]

[saw whirring]

Oh, for f***'s sake.

Peggy, you gotta be

on that.

It's gotta be runnin'

all night by sundown.

I ain't takin' any chances

I ain't gotta.

What's he so

worked up about?

Baby, while we're young.

I was hopin' I wasn't

gonna have to tell you.

You're only here

a couple of days.

Oh, okay.

Thank you.

Thank you.

[motor whirring]

I don't wanna

scare you, hon.

I don't think

they want you.

I really don't.

But it's only fair

that you know.

- I ain't crazy, either.

- He ain't.

Know what?

Remember

a couple years ago

we told the family

that he was locked up

for hittin' up

that liquor store?

Mm-hmm.

He wasn't locked up.

He didn't rob nothin'.

They had him!

I'm -- I'm sorry.

Who had him where?

Where?

Uh...space.

I don't know.

Uh...a -- a different

dimension.

I don't -- I don't know.

Them grey f***ers.

Those -- those -- those

grey f***ers!

You know,

and -- and Martians

or whatever you want

to call them

but they're not

from Earth

and they ain't cute

like no E.T.

Not like no E.T.

So..

...you see, Court.

I ain't sure

what they want

but they ain't nice.

It's like they come

through this -- this

chemical pathway-like

type thing.

You see, meth,

meth, for example

it opens up somethin'

in the mind.

But what does it really

open, huh?

For some, creativity.

And, uh, others,

they just wanna

just wanna f***

like rabbits.

Oh.

[giggles]

What?

Pardon my French.

But for them, maybe

it's a way in, right?

Or maybe

they just know better

how to access its power.

Well, goddamn,

I ain't no scientist

but I know what I see.

Why you, Uncle Brock?

[Brock chuckles]

I've been workin'

on a special isomer

of meth for years.

Started on accident.

I was makin' a batch,

already halfway through

and it comes time to add

the red phosphorus

but I was out.

It was either throw out

the whole batch..

...or improvise.

Well, I guess

I don't have to tell you

what I did.

I improvised.

[chuckles]

Invented this

whole new sh*t.

And was startin'

to get it perfect.

And I think they know.

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