What If... Page #4

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No, absolutely not.

She and I... no, no,

Why do you ask?

When Liv's dad

slept on the couch,

they got divorced the next Week.

Your mom and your dad,

they're... We're,

We're not gonna do that.

Can I say my prayers

out here?

Yeah, come on.

Okay.

Dear God, please bless mommy

and daddy, Who We all know

is going through a tough time

right noW and probably

doesn't know that he's making

mommy sort of nervous.

And maybe you could help his

brain because he seems

to be forgetting a lot of

stuff he should know.

And please bless Kimberly

and Jonah, even though I keep

forgetting to change his water.

And thank you for dying

to save us all, Amen.

Amen.

Bedtime, Megs.

The great What if, huh?

Well, What if I just

drove back into the city?

What?

You've got to be kidding me!

Reverend Dr. Benjamin Walker

of Clearville.

They thought of everything.

No, no, stay focused.

Stay focused.

It's meant to distract you.

It's not real.

It's not real.

No cash, What?

What, no credit cards.

This guy's a loser.

We're married, right?

I mean, What's yours is mine

and What's mine

isn't in my Wallet right noW.

Daddy, What are you

doing With mommy's purse?

Well, I'm... I'm just...

Don't go anywhere.

No, no, no I couldn't

take that from you.

No, it Wouldn't be right.

Hey.

It's prepay after 11:00.

Yeah, I know.

How much gas

Will this get me?

Huh, huh, look at that,

huh, huh?

It's um...

...it's a dollar.

I'm swimming in the red,

drownin' in the blues.

I ain't rollin' in the green

like I likes to.

My piggy bank is empty.

No chicks in the coup.

I need a cash cow,

a little moolah, wooh!

There's too much...

See ya.

Oh, come on.

You gotta be kidding me.

Are you...

Ah!

Oh.

Oh, great.

Yeah, big surprise it's Mike.

Yup, big surprise.

I'm going back to the city,

you can't stop me.

Don't intend to.

So you can just knock off

the twilight zone...

You don't?

So you're not here

to drag me back?

No.

Boss thinks it'd be a good idea

if you just saw What the World

Would be like Without ya.

Come on, jump in.

This is a big mistake.

I think so too.

I mean for you.

See, once We get

back into the city,

this "What if" charade of yours

is all gonna fall apart

and I can go back to being me.

Ben, this isn't a trick.

It's not some local phenomena

like a thunderstorm Where

it's raining here, 10 miles away

it's clear and sunny.

It's all changed.

It's different,

the whole world.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Whatever.

Look, I'm an angel.

We don't lie.

We can't lie.

But you do Whatever the boss

tells you to do, right?

Yeah, exactly.

So What if the boss

tells you to lie?

I don't mean a big huge,

you know, hurtful lie,

but just a teeny, teeny

little White lie?

Wow, never

thought about that.

You know, I Wonder if God could

build a rock so big

that he himself

couldn't pick it up.

Yeah, exactly.

Ben, I'm just gonna

have to let you go

and see for yourself, huh?

So why do you want to

come back here so bad?

Among many things,

have you seen Cynthia?

She's gorgeous.

Oh, not our type.

Not your type?

My life is great.

People envy me.

I get What I Want.

I love my life.

Ironically, this little stunt

of yours has reminded me

of how happy I am With

the choices I've made.

Can I help you, sir?

Hey, Elaine, I'm in

to see the old man.

Excuse me, sir.

You need to Wait here.

Do you have an appointment?

No, I'm pretty sure that

becoming partner means

I don't need to make

an appointment.

Oh, Claire, can you tell me

What's going on here?

Elaine's acting like she

doesn't know Who I am.

I'm sorry, and you are?

Oh, right, yeah, you don't

know Who your boss is

from the last 5 years.

Hey, Jim, Jimbo,

how you doin'?

Hey, is that Ross Bessette

in there?

Is the Bessette Industry's

deal going forward?

That's none

of your business.

Who are you here With?

I'm...

Are you a reporter

or With the SEC?

Jim, seriously,

are you putting me on?

Joel, this gentleman has

an interesting question.

He wants to know if that's

Ross Bessette in there

of Bessette Industries.

It's nothing,

We're just reviewing

their foreign holdings,

tightening up their portfolio.

Okay, you know What?

This charade is over.

It's not funny anymore.

We all know that

I belong here.

I graduated top of my business

school class at Harvard.

Moody, that's Moody

Bible Institute, Chicago,

doctorate in theology,

minor in biblical archeology.

Carry on.

Believe it or not,

We already have all

the biblical archaeologists

on staff that We need.

If you'll excuse me,

I'm running late.

Love the jeans.

Soda water.

I need soda water.

What happened?

Oh, some soccer mom let her

little brat spill juice

all over my new Versace.

What is this?

Of course, she doesn't

remember me either, right?

Yeah, okay, last time I saw you,

I Was your Benny bear.

Benny bear?

That's my fiance you're

speaking to, Barney bear.

Fiance, What?

This guy?

Are you kidding me?

You're engaged to me.

Oh, really?

Yes, We met 2 years ago

on your father's yacht

in the Caymans.

You Were Wearing

your purple bikini.

I Was having Way

too many Mojitos.

I have never laid eyes on

you before in my life,

unless, of course, you detailed

my car or served me coffee?

NoW you know Why

I love this Woman.

You know, if they continue

With this behavior,

their application for Weeping

and gnashing of teeth

Will be approved.

All right, I'm

not leaving here.

I'm not leaving here.

Call security.

Seventeenth floor, please.

You got a black Benz too.

Are you kidding me?

Hey, hey, this isn't over!

I did it once

and I'll do it again!

I'll build this place up.

- I'm gonna...

- Ben.

What?

You're embarrassing

yourself.

Well, you're

embarrassing yourself.

Oh, it's not like

I didn't Warn ya.

Well, you Were

a big help.

Look, I need you

to close your eyes

and count backward

from a hundred.

I'll take care of the van.

No, I'm not

going back there.

You can't make me.

Oh, I love slow learners.

Look, Cynthia's

coming back.

That's not Cynth...

Little twirp's been

in my closet again.

I was not!

Your sister is not a twirp.

You're right, mom,

she's a stupid twirp.

I am not stupid.

You go apologize to your

sister and then come back

downstairs for breakfast

and apologize to me.

Of course you take her side.

Any idea What my morning

looks like?

Ten a. M.,

commitment testing?

We're meeting With

Brittney and Carl,

the couple that Wants

to get married.

Commitment testing?

Right, you know how, you know,

from your standpoint,

Would you best describe

commitment testing?

To discourage them from

making the Wrong decision,

if they're unequally yoked.

Shake 'em up a little.

Yeah.

Daddy, Why did Jonah die?

Well, I don't know, maybe he

didn't love Jesus

the Way fish are supposed to.

Mommy, my goldfish

is in hell!

Really?

Megan.

Probably not the best thing

to say, huh?

I thought

it Was funny.

"Then the Lord God made

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