White Mischief Page #3

The only thing

that interests Joss Erroll is cash.

He married

his first two wives for their cash.

- Has Diana any cash?

- No.

You're all right, then.

- There's the pact.

- The what?

When we married,

l made a promise that...

if she fell in love with another,

l wouldn't stop her.

What on earth for?

She said she'd do the same for me.

You didn't promise

her any money, did you?

- 5,OOO a year for the next seven years.

- Good Lord!

l think you've been a bit of a chump.

How much money have you got?

l don't see that

that's any business of yours.

Well, l do. Diana is still my wife.

lf you're going to keep her,

you'd better be able to afford it.

l expect you know

about our arrangement?

She did mention it, yes.

She won't ask me to honour it.

That's one of the best things about

Diana. She's straight about money.

Refill.

Diana and l have been

most frightfully happy together.

Proceed with sale

of Cheevers estate.

Thank you.

l hate the thought

of you belonging to Jock.

l'd like to marry you very much...

..but we haven't any money.

Well, there's my army salary.

- Yes...

- And you have your money from Jock.

- l couldn't possible take it.

- No.

No, of course not.

Where's the toast?

- Abdullah.

- Bwana.

On the drawing room mantelpiece,

you'll find a small revolver.

Put it in the armoury,

and bring me back the key.

- Morning.

- Morning, Jock.

Morning.

Porridge, msabu?

- How are you this morning, June?

- Bloody awful.

- Bwana.

- What is it?

Gun not there, bwana.

Colt.32, two-inch barrel.

Yes, inspector. Thank you.

- What's going on?

- We had a thief last night.

- Will you still go to Ceylon?

- Yes.

Naturally, l will honour

our arrangement.

Don't want to be a bad loser.

Much too boring.

Why don't we all have dinner

at the club tonight?

Celebrate.

Are you sure?

Absolutely.

She told him

about this London bakery

that delivers bread

ready sliced and George said...

''l hope this new labour-saving

device will soon spread to golf balls!''

A toast...

To love! To the happy couple!

May the noble house

of Erroll be blessed with an heir!

Well, thank you for a marvellous dinner.

- You're not going?

- Thank you, Jock.

- Night, Juney.

- You've been wonderful.

Joss, Joss, just do me a favour, Joss.

Bring her back before dawn, Joss.

Yes, all right, Jock.

His sporting days are over.

His little light is out.

What used to be his sex appeal

is now his water spout!

Oh, do shut up!

- Shh.

- Shh.

- But you're broke!

- l have prospects.

- What prospects?

- Here, in the army.

A career?

All right. This is the land of opportunity.

l may try pioneering.

Joss, one more dance

then you can take me home.

l'd rather be a sh*t in London

than a pioneer in Africa.

Alice, we're going on safari.

How enchanting!

- Tanganyika.

- l should like to come.

- It would be fun, wouldn't it?

- Never mind.

Joss, you don't

have to worry about money.

- What makes you so sure about that?

- 'Cause l've got some.

- l don't want it.

- What do you mean?

l don't want anything of Jock's...

..other than what l have already got.

- It's all right.

- Sorry!

l'll take him upstairs.

- What day is it tomorrow?

- l'll tell you in the morning, Jock.

What's the problem?

Has there been an accident?

For God's sake!

Hello. Is that you, Gwlady?

What do you mean?

Oh!

What is it? What's happened?

No...

No!

There's a lot

of rubbish in the kitchen yard.

See that it is burnt immediately.

No!

Oh, Joss.

For heaven's sake, Alice.

No, msabu, please.

Now you are mine forever, Joss.

Not possible, msabu.

Sir Delves?

l'm afraid, there are one or two

questions l must put to you.

Sir?

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

What are people saying?

As far as l know,

they're right behind you.

How do you feel now?

Fine.

- No more doubts?

- No.

Because l'd rather they hang me now

if you still had doubts.

l was fond of him, too, you know.

Yes, l know.

- Where are we going?

- Oh, anywhere.

Juney.

This is the remnant

of the checked stocking

which you say you

retrieved from the bonfire?

Yes, it is.

Was there

anything peculiar about it?

Yes, l noticed some stains

which l took to be blood.

Recording evidence, Lord.

How long did it take you to walk

from the murder spot to the house?

- Twenty-five minutes.

- Was that at a normal pace?

- Yes.

- Thank you, superintendent.

Your witness, Mr Morris.

Chief Superintendent Poppy,

you're a man of 43.

- 45.

- Sound in wind and limb?

Yes.

ls there anything

in this crime to preclude

the possibility of it being the work

of a woman?

No.

Amongst the letters

you found in Lord Erroll's house

were some from a certain lady

notorious for having revenged herself

for the disloyalty of a lover

by shooting him with a revolver?

- Yes.

- Have you discounted

the possibility of her being a suspect?

- l have.

- On what grounds?

She was in bed

with a gentleman at the time.

- We weren't doing anything...

-..that l can remember.

Silence!

At this party to which you refer,

what did you say to the accused?

l attempted to console him.

l don't remember my exact words.

How would you describe his attitude?

Morose. Bitter.

- Resentful.

- Enough to murder his wife's lover?

- Obiection.

- In my opinion, yes.

Sustained.

No more questions.

This moroseness that you describe,

could it not be attributable to the fact

that the accused

was obliged to wear women's clothes?

- l do not think so.

- You find that normal?

lt was simply a party.

Were you in love with Lord Erroll?

l was fond of him, yes.

We had been friends for many years.

l say that you were extremely

fond of the deceased.

That like many women in this court

you had been his mistress.

- Obiection.

- Sustained.

And you are so upset over his death,

that you have become irrational.

Objection!

Strike that from the record.

Thank you.

Your defence man is good.

Damn well should be,

the amount l'm paying him.

You can afford it, Jock.

He's a bit rough.

- Hope that won't be a disadvantage.

- No, don't worry.

No jury in Africa is going

to convict an English gentleman.

After all, there is a war on.

Rains are late.

What are they saying at the club?

This doesn't help.

lt's Diana l feel sorry for.

This trial is harder

for her than it is for me.

After it's over,

l'd like to get her something special.

What do you think she'd like?

Pearls?

Do have anything to say

to this scandal?

Hello.

You killed him,

you vicious tart!

- Lady Broughton, are you all right?

- l don't even know her!

- Please let us through.

This is a picture

of a cartridge case from Soames' farm,

where the shooting practice

took place?

What brought your attention to it?

You'll see here, here and here,

these are powder markings.

The powder is black.

lt is of an extremely rare type,

it's not been used since the Great War.

Thank you. l would like

the jury to re-examine Exhibit 29.

His Lordship's ear

is peppered with black powder.

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