Who Made The Potatoe Salad? Page #8

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What about making

the engagement announcement?

- It's gonna have to wait.

- Ashley.

Look, I'm sorry, but...

Sorry, we'll just have to talk about it

on the train tomorrow, okay?

Try to get some sleep.

Frank, yeah, what's up, man?

Yeah, this is Mike.

I know I haven't talked to you

since the academy, I know.

And I missed your wedding

and your son's circumcision.

Yeah, I know all that, okay,

but that's not important.

This is important. I need a big favor.

All right, baby.

- Jake.

- Take your shirt off, will you?

- Take your shirt off.

- No.

- Baby, you're sweating my hair.

- Come on now.

Frank. Frank, is that you?

- Is that you?

- Yeah. Yeah.

You didn't tell me

this place was this far in the hood.

Man, there's dogs out there. Pit bulls.

Look, man, are you sure

these people don't have guns?

Yeah, they do, but don't worry

about that, though.

- What?

- No, no. Trust me, trust me.

How come you didn't wear

the brown makeup like I told you?

Ain't nobody gonna believe

a white guy would try to rob this house.

- They didn't have any at the 99 cent store.

- Cheap ass.

Besides, people'll just think

I'm looking for crystal meth.

Whatever. Come on. Come on.

You're a fool. Come on.

- Come on. Help me move this coffee table.

- Okay.

This is where I'm gonna whoop you at,

right here in this area.

Sounds good to me. Yeah.

All right. Cool. Cool. All right.

Let's change positions.

- Let's be... 'Cause...

- Good idea. Good idea.

They'll see me when they come down.

They'll see me.

- Yeah, good thinking.

- All right.

- Here we go.

- All right.

Now we gonna do this just like

we used to do at the academy.

Nothing different. Stay loose.

All right. You ready? All right, ready?

Go.

Santa Claus?

- Who's that, baby?

- I don't know.

Come up in this motherf***er?

I don't think so.

Good. Right where I left it.

Come on!

Go to sleep. Go to sleep.

I got this. I got this. I got this.

Teach you to f***

with the Jenkins, motherf***er.

Michael.

How could you do this?

I thought we were friends.

Oh, God.

I have no idea how he knew my name.

Really?

Wait. Wait a minute.

Do you know him, Michael?

No.

Well, kind of.

What the f*** do you mean, "Kind of,"

young blood?

Yeah, what do you mean, Michael?

Michael, please tell me

you didn't have anything to do with this.

Hell, no.

Look, I just figured if...

I figured if I staged a burglary,

and saved the day,

your dad would like me.

Then we could tell him

we're getting married.

Married? Hell, no.

I would never allow my daughter

to marry a motherf***er like you.

You put my family in jeopardy

with this nonsense

you're bringing into my house.

Look, sir...

Tell the paramedics to come back.

They forgot somebody.

How could you do this, Michael?

Somebody could have got killed.

Baby, I just wanted

your family to accept me.

You said we would be together whether

you clicked with my parents or not.

I didn't care whether they liked you or not,

but now, I don't know.

Maybe we shouldn't be together.

- No, Ashley, Ashley, don't...

- Wait, wait. Wait.

Just get your sh*t and get out.

I am truly disappointed.

Baby, we're about to hit rush hour traffic.

We got to go. Come on.

Tell me, Daddy,

why did you hate Michael so much?

- 'Cause the boy's a pig, Ashley.

- I mean, other than that.

What was so wrong with him?

He's a punk.

The boy is soft.

I can't believe you can't see that.

- Is that it?

- Yeah, I mean, what else is there?

Me being happy.

And that makes you happy?

Staged robberies in my house

makes you happy?

No.

Me being with Michael makes me happy.

I love everything about him. His laugh,

his personality, everything.

But he's a pig, Ashley.

And you know how I feel about...

Daddy, it's not the '60s anymore. God!

Decent black men, proud black men

can be police officers.

Well, I don't know anything

about that, Ashley, okay?

Isn't civil rights and equal opportunity

what you guys were fighting for

in the first place?

Yeah.

Yeah, well, I'll say Michael

is a shining example of just that.

A proud black man

who wants to marry a black woman,

who just happens to be a police officer.

Daddy, if that's not an example

of freedom, then I don't know what is.

Ashley, baby, we gotta go.

We're running out of time. Let's go.

Hey, Mike.

Hey, man, I'm sorry to hear

about you and Ashley, you know.

It's all right.

So, she is single now.

Sorry, tough break.

Mike, you know how we do?

Take it one day at a time.

You know what I'm saying?

Keep your head up...

Yeah, you know, I got divorced

a couple of years ago.

- Dude, it was rough.

- Really?

Yeah, but they say

the fourth one's the toughest.

You're just on your first, you know...

Keep your head up, dude. Fight the power.

Mike, let me get him out of here.

Listen, take care of yourself,

talk to me, give me a call, whatever.

You're good. I appreciate that.

- Cool?

- Yeah.

- You're sure?

- You're good.

- Let's go.

- She looks great.

Come on, White. Damn.

Hey, young blood. How you doing?

What are you doing here?

I thought you hated me.

Is there somewhere that

we can talk in private around here?

Yeah, yeah. You know, we could...

Right here.

Have a seat, son.

Now, I came down here to rap with you

for a second,

'cause I didn't like what went down

back at the house.

- Listen, Mr. Jenkins, I didn't...

- Let me finish, son. Let me finish.

Now,

to say that me and the pigs...

I mean, law enforcement, have an

unstable history is an understatement.

Not only was there

the alleged attempted murder

of a police officer,

but it's the fact that the pigs...

I'm sorry, the cops,

along with the Federal Government,

plotted to take my party down.

They infiltrated my organization

and caused dissension among the ranks,

turning a lot of us into snitches,

dope fiends, pimps and hoodlums.

They would have you to believe

that my party was a gang.

We wasn't no gang.

We had all kinds of beautiful programs

for the people in the community.

We had after-school programs,

we had free breakfast for the kids,

we registered our people to vote.

All we were trying to do

was protect our community.

Thanks.

And my feeling for police officers

runs real deep.

But I came here to tell you

that my feelings for my daughter

run even deeper.

I see the way that she loves you

and I don't want to lose my baby girl.

So I came here to tell you

that I would be happy

to have you as a son-in-law.

As long as you don't stage no more

fake robberies in my goddamn house.

No more "Keystone Kop," "Shaft" sh*t,

you know?

All right, I won't f*** with you

about that no more.

I don't have to eat pork, do I?

Well, you know, I was always conflicted

about the pork issue

when I was in the Party.

I mean, pork ain't never killed nobody.

Okay, no pork.

Hey, look, I just want to say

I'm sorry for being so hard on you.

No, that... No, it's...

That's right. That's good enough

right there. That's about all I can handle.

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