Wild Tales

Hello. Am I on time?

ID, please.

Let me ask you,

my ticket was paid by a company,

can I get the miles?

No, there are no miles for this fare.

I see. Never mind, then.

Boarding is through gate 3.

Thanks.

I'll help you.

Fine.

Business or pleasure?

Both, I hope.

What do you do?

I'm a model.

Sorry, I should have figured.

Thank you.

Catwalk or advertising?

Catwalk.

And you, what do you do sir?

- You're killing me.

- Why?

You said "sir"

and I sank

to the fifth circle of hell.

I have to do something

about my hair.

I'm a music critic.

Sounds horrible, I know.

It doesn't.

Rock?

Now you're trying to be nice.

Classical music.

I see.

My first boyfriend

was a classical musician.

Well, that's what he studied.

What's his name?

No, he's not famous.

He sent in some works

back when we were together,

but they were never published.

Or printed.

What's the right word'?

Choose whatever term you like

and I'll make it popular.

Pasternak. Gabriel Pasternak.

Pasternak...

If I'd known it, I'd have told you

I was a gravedigger, not a critic.

He submitted his thesis

at the Conservatory of Music

when I was president of the jury.

I ripped him apart.

Yes, I was with him at the time.

What you did to him was awful.

He spent a week in bed

after reading the review.

Sometimes I have to destroy

some poor guy's self- esteem

to protect the ears

of an entire population.

I may be wrong sometimes,

but in this case...

His work was...

a dreadful monstrosity.

Are you still in touch with him?

We didn't end on great terms.

But I'm still fond of him.

He was a good guy.

Maybe, but if you present

a piece like that to a jury

there has to be

something wrong with you.

Gabriel Pasternak!

How could I forget him?

We laughed about it for months.

I'm sorry to interrupt,

but I was listening to you.

What a huge coincidence!

Gabriel Pasternak

was my student

at Palomar Elementary School.

I had to tell him

he was being held back.

I can assure you:

the kid had issues.

I've never seen anything like it

in 30 years as a teacher.

He was screaming

and crying like a newborn baby.

Miss Leguizamn?

Ignacio Fontana.

Remember me'?

Ignacio Fontana!

Unbelievable!

There's a cosmic connection here.

Wasn't Pasternak one of your classmates?

- Are you friends with him?

- Intimate friends.

Poor guy, we were awful to him.

This is beyond unbelievable.

I was a manager at Home Depot,

where this psycho you mentioned

worked for a while.

He always had trouble with customers,

so we had to let him go.

- And when I...

- Excuse me.

Does anyone else know Gabriel Pasternak?

- Me.

- Me too.

Why?

Why are you on this plane?

Did you buy your tickets?

I'm in real estate,

they sent it to me to check out a farm.

I have a meeting

with the Tourism Secretary.

They bought the ticket.

I won mine in a raffle.

I couldn't change the date.

I had to fly today.

Gabriel Pasternak is

the cabin chief on this flight.

We did our training together,

we were friends.

Then he asked me out

and when I refused, he started to get...

Never mind.

After takeoff,

he brought coffee to the cockpit.

The door is locked,

the pilots won't answer,

I'm desperate!

I don't know what to do!

I cheated on him

with his only friend.

With him!

Gabriel!

Gabriel, are you there?

It's Victor,

Victor Jensen!

Talk to me, please!

- Who are you?

- I was his psychiatrist for years.

Then I raised my fees,

he got mad and stopped seeing me.

Open the door, Gabriel!

Listen!

It's not your fault!

You're just a victim here!

I'm telling you, plain and simple:

it was your parents

who ruined your life!

They asked too much of you

ever since you were born,

they projected all their

disappointments on you!

They are responsible

for your suffering!

Gabriel, no one here...

has anything to do with it!

WILD TALES:

Good evening.

Party of one?

I see you're good at math.

One, yes.

Wherever you like.

Today's special

is lentils and rice stew.

Delicious!

Did he order?

That guy's from my hometown.

He's a loan shark, a gangster.

He auctioned our house.

Because of him,

my father killed himself.

Two weeks after the funeral,

he tried to seduce my mom.

He wouldn't leave her alone

so we moved here.

You know how many times

I dreamed of having him

right in front of me?

I'm going to say something.

Say something?

Your dad kills himself

because of this guy,

and you're just going

to insult him?

Let's put rat poison in his food.

There's some in the storeroom.

A good dose and his heart

will blow in five minutes.

Lots of work?

Not with this weather...

I've been trying to get your attention

for a while.

You need to check on

your customers, honey.

Sorry.

Can I take your order?

French fries with fried eggs.

I'll order something else

if I'm still hungry.

- To drink?

- Diet Coke.

Diet Coke?

Diet Coke.

French fries, fried eggs.

Want me to write it?

I hate him!

Make him French fries with fried eggs.

Are you crazy?

Want me to go to prison?

To prison?

Who'll do the autopsy on this jerk?

The FBI?

French fries with fried eggs.

They'll think the cholesterol

killed him.

Just cook his meal, will you?

Can I have your opinion?

You seem like a smart girl.

Come here.

Which do you like better? This one?

CUENCA = SAFETY

Or this one?

The red one.

The red one.

Hold on.

Don't I look too serious?

No, I think it's fine.

Thank you.

Besides, prison's not that bad.

It just has bad reputation.

They feed you, you don't pay rent,

you have nothing to worry about.

And if you make nice friends,

you can have a good time.

You play cards...

Were you in prison?

A While.

And I felt freer in there than here.

This is sh*t.

What did you do?

Nothing I regret.

And he's running for mayor!

That son of a b*tch.

Can you believe it?

Of course I can.

Bastards rule the world.

Wake up, kid!

$0?

Shall we do the community a favor?

Great!

You did it.

Don't play naive,

as if you hadn't noticed.

What?

That's our country.

Everyone wants these guys

to get what they deserve,

but no one

is willing to lift a finger.

Be proud, kid.

For once in your miserable life,

you're doing something worthwhile.

- I'm not doing anything.

- You're not?

You stay here arguing instead of

taking the food away from him.

Relax.

You have nothing to worry about.

If there's an investigation,

I'll say I used rat poison in the kitchen

because we were infested,

which is true, by the way,

and some of it,

accidentally fell into a pot.

What will they say?

This is insane.

Could this sh*t be expired?

There's no expiration date.

How does it work?

If rat poison is expired,

is it more or less harmful?

- Everything OK?

- Yes.

Have a seat.

- What are you having, Alexis?

- Fanta, maybe?

- Should I warm it up?

- No! Leave it.

If I need you to warm it up, I'll ask.

Can I have a Fanta, please?

I've had it with this girl.

We have to do something,

they're both eating.

- Add more poison?

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