Wit Page #4

l was at home reading.

l felt so bad, l got cold.

Fever and neutropenia.

They said to come in.

You did the right thing.

Did somebody drive you?

l took a taxi.

Can you walk?

Okay, just sit here a minute.

l'll get Jason, he's on call tonight

and he'll be able to give you some meds.

Glad l was here tonight.

l'm gonna get you to a bed soon, okay?

l'm gonna get you some nice juice

with lots of ice, okay?

Lights. l left all the lights on at my house.

Don't worry about it. lt'll be okay.

Prof. Bearing, how you feeling?

My teeth are chattering.

-Vitals?

-Temp 102, pulse 120, respiration 36.

Fever and neutropenia,

it's a shake and bake.

Blood culture and urine, stat. Admit her.

Prepare her for reverse isolation.

Start with acetaminophen.

Vitals every four hours.

You'd better talk to Kelekian

about lowering the dose next cycle.

lt's too much for her.

No way, she's tough, she can take it.

Full dose. Wake me when

the counts come from the lab.

Good morning, Dr. Bearing.

Full dose?

Definite progress, everything okay?

Yes.

You're doing swell.

lsolation's no problem, a couple of days.

Think of it as a vacation.

-Jason!

-What?

ln isolation...

l am isolated.

For once l can use a term literally.

The chemotherapeutic agents

eradicating my cancer...

have also eradicated my immune system.

ln my present condition...

every living thing

is a health hazard to me.

l really have not got time for this.

Particularly health-care professionals.

Just to check the l and O sheet

takes me a half an hour to do precautions.

Prof. Bearing, how are you feeling today?

Fine, just shaking sometimes

from the chills.

lV should kick in anytime now,

no problem.

Listen, l gotta go.

Keep pushing the fluids, okay?

l am not in isolation

because l have cancer.

Because...

l have a tumor the size of a grapefruit.

No...

l am in isolation...

because l am being treated for cancer.

My treatment imperils my health.

Herein lies the paradox.

John Donne would revel in it.

l would revel in it,

if he wrote a poem about it.

My students would flounder in it...

because paradox is

too difficult to understand.

''Think of it as a puzzle...''

l would tell them, ''an intellectual game.''

Or l would have told them...

were it a game.

Which it is not.

''...threw death on else immortal us

''lf lecherous goats, if serpents envious

''Cannot be damned

''Alas, why should l be?

''Why should intent or reason, born in me

''Make sins, else equal,

in me more heinous?

''And mercy being easy,

and glorious to God

''in his stern wrath, why threatens he?

''But who am l,

that dare dispute with thee?

''O God. Oh! of thine only worthy blood,

and my tears

''make a heavenly Lethean flood

''And drown in it my sin's black memory

''That thou remember them,

some claim as debt

''l think it mercy, if thou wilt forget''

A typical prayer would plead,

''Remember me, O Lord.''

True believers ask to be

remembered by God.

The speaker of this sonnet

asks God to forget.

We want to correct the speaker.

To remind him of

the assurance of salvation.

But it's too late,

the poetic encounter is over.

We are left to our own consciences.

-Have we outwitted Donne?

-Miss Bearing.

Or, have we been outwitted?

What is it?

You have to go down for a test.

Jason just called.

Another ultrasound.

They're concerned

about a bowel obstruction.

-No, not now.

-l'm sorry, they want it now.

Not right now,

it's not supposed to be now.

They want to do it now, l've got the chair.

lt should not be now, l....

l have this planned for now,

not an ultrasound.

-No more tests, we've covered that.

-l know.

But they need for it to be now.

lt isn't a bad procedure and it won't take

long, so why don't you come now?

l do not want to go now.

Name?

B-E-A-R-l-N-G.

Kelekian.

lt'll just be a minute.

-Time for your break?

-Yeah.

Take a break.

''This is my play's last scene

''Here

''Heavens appoint

my pilgrimage's last mile

''And my race

''ldly, yet quickly run

''Hath this last pace

''My span's last inch

''My minute's last point

''And gluttonous death

''Will instantly unjoint my body and soul''

John Donne...

l've always particularly liked that poem.

ln the abstract.

Now l find the image of...

my minute's last point...

a little too, shall we say...

pointed.

l don't mean to complain

but l am becoming very sick.

Very sick. Ultimately sick, as it were.

ln everything l have done, l have been...

steadfast.

Resolute.

Some would say in the extreme.

Now, as you can see, l am...

distinguishing myself in illness.

l have survived eight treatments...

of Hexamethophosphacil and Vinplatin...

at the full dose, ladies and gentlemen.

l have broken the record.

l have become something of a celebrity.

Kelekian and Jason are simply delighted.

l think...

they see celebrity status for themselves...

upon the appearance

of the journal article...

they will no doubt write about me.

But l flatter myself.

The article will not be about me...

it will be about my ovaries. lt will...

be about my peritoneal cavity.

Which, despite their best intentions,

is now crawling with cancer.

What we have come to think of as me...

is, in fact, just the specimen jar.

Just the dust jacket.

Just the white piece of paper...

that bears the little black marks.

My next line is supposed to be

something like this:

''lt is such a relief...

''to get back to my room

after those infernal tests.''

This is hardly true.

lt would be a relief to be a cheerleader...

on her way to Daytona Beach

for spring break.

To get back to my room

after those infernal tests...

is just the next thing that happens.

Oh, God.

lt is such a relief to get back

to my goddamn room...

after those goddamn tests.

Professor Bearing?

Just wanna check your l and O.

Okay. How you feeling today?

-Fine.

-Great, that's just great.

How are my fluids?

Pretty good. No kidney involvement yet.

That's pretty amazing with Hex and Vin.

How will you know when

the kidneys are involved?

-Lots of in, not much out.

-That simple?

No way.

Compromised kidney function is

a highly complex reaction.

-l'm simplifying it for you.

-Thank you.

-We're supposed to.

-Bedside manner.

There's a whole course on it

in med school. lt's required.

-Colossal waste of time for researchers.

-l can imagine.

Jason?

-What were you saying just then?

-When?

Never mind.

Professor Bearing,

are you experiencing confusion?

-Short-term memory loss?

-No.

-You sure?

-Yes.

Okay.

No, l was just wondering...

why cancer?

Why cancer?

Why not open-heart surgery?

Yeah.

Why not plumbing?

Why not run a lube rack

for all the surgeons know about...

Homo sapiens sapiens?

No way.

Cancer's the only thing l ever wanted.

No, really, cancer is....

Awesome?

Yeah.

lt is awesome. How does it do it?

The intercellular regulatory mechanisms...

especially for proliferation

and differentiation.

-The malignant neoplasia just don't get it.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes