Women In Trouble Page #8

- That's weird.

What do people do with it?

- Well...

l guess some people have

strange tastes in decorating.

You know, it's-

it's like a novelty item.

- What's a novelty?

- Like a funny thing

that doesn't really-

l mean, it has a use,

but it's also like a...

boy.

l'll have to think about that.

- Maybe l could bring one

into school.

- l don't think that would be-

l'm not sure

how that would go over.

- We could use it for sex ed

instead of those lame pictures.

- Why don't we read a magazine?

Here.

- Here's a good one.

"Man jailed

over his wife's breasts.

"London, July 3rd.

"A London man has been sentenced

to 20 months in jail

"for reportedly kidnapping

his wife

"to stop her from having surgery

to enlarge her breasts.

"Deckland Summer, 31,

told his wife, Emma,

"'Don't do it,' while dragging

her out of the hospital,

"where she was waiting

to have the operation,

"The Sun reported Wednesday.

"He said he had a knife

and would kill her

"if she did not come with him.

"The woman managed to escape

from Summer

"and ran into an office

before collapsing.

"Hospital worker Luanna Ali

told police he said to her,

"'l like you as you are.

l will kill you now.'

"Since then, Emma, 25,

has left her husband

"and also decided to forgo

the breast enhancement

operation."

So kind of a happy ending.

- He loved her the way she was.

lt's not easy

to find a guy like that.

- But he was crazy.

- Which is not hard to find.

- Do you have fake b*obs?

- No.

You?

- l'm only 13.

- Mm, people start early

these days.

- l thought all porn stars

had fake b*obs.

- Did Doris say that too?

- She said you were an actress

in movies

l wouldn't want to see.

You guys are really open

with each other.

- Yep.

Why do they call them

adult movies

if they're so juvenile?

- lt's a euphemism.

- What's a euphemism?

- Uh, a polite way

of saying something

that drags all the fun

out of saying it.

- Like saying a plastic vagina's

a novelty item?

You're a smart kid.

What else did your-

did Doris say?

- That in your heart,

you already quit your job,

but you don't know it yet,

and that you're yearning

to become a person of substance.

- Hmm.

- The rock music world

is in shock

with the news that Nick Chapel,

the drummer for the popular

rock band Midnight Love Parade,

has been found dead

in the lavatory

of a commercial airliner.

lnvestigators found

drug paraphernalia on Chapel

and are handling this as

a possible accidental overdose.

The female flight attendant

was in hysterics

as the plane touched down

in New York City,

where Chapel was scheduled

to play tonight.

- Elektra.

Elektra, can you hear me?

Wake up.

- Hey.

- Hey there.

- Did l faint?

- At least you were

in the perfect place.

- Where's Charlotte?

- She went to get a snack.

- l like her.

- She's a little weird.

- l've never liked

any kid before,

even as a kid.

How's your sister?

- Well...

they are reconstructing her face

as we speak.

Those are their exact words.

They say that the plastic

surgeon is the best of the best

and she's gonna be just fine.

- Thank God.

- Thank God.

- You believe in God?

- Right now, yes.

- l'd like to believe.

But l don't know.

l look around the world,

and l'm in a constant state

of disbelief.

- Charlotte told me about Nick.

ls he the father?

Did you love him?

- lt's starting to dawn on me

that maybe l did.

But l never told him.

You know, the last guy

l really liked,

we dated for a couple months.

l didn't know

if he knew about me,

and l didn't want to ask.

But anyway...

the day after l finally went

to bed with him,

he asked me for my autograph.

- Hmph.

- He was almost sweet about it.

"l can't believe l f***ed

Elektra Luxx," he told me.

He wanted to share it with me,

with his friends,

with the world.

With Nick, l just didn't

want him to think

l was some groupie stalker

after his money.

l just wanted so badly

not to hide anything anymore,

you know, to tell the truth.

- So tell me.

- What?

- Pretend l'm Nick.

Tell me the truth.

l mean, you planned your speech.

You've rehearsed it

in front of the mirror,

or l know l would have.

- Let me hear it.

- Okay.

Nick,

l've done 62 X-rated movies,

a thousand club appearances.

l have 20 fan clubs,

my own website.

A conservative estimate

would place

the amount of people l've f***ed

in the mid-hundreds.

l've dated movie stars,

politicians,

and a pair of twin mafioso

restaurant chefs

who nearly got me arrested

by drug enforcement agents.

l've had my amphetamine phase,

my coke phase,

my three-cigarette-pack-a-day

phase.

l haven't talked to a single

member of my family-

drunks and religious

psychopaths,

each and every one of them-

in ten years.

l've had three abortions,

been kicked out

of my last four apartments...

And l have never, ever

had anyone

kiss me like you do.

- That's beautiful.

But it's too late.

l mean, if we don't tell people

how we feel,

what are we doing here?

You need to tell Charlotte.

- l know.

Once Addy's better and-

- No, she needs to know now.

- Now is not a good time.

- But there is no good time.

There is no right time.

There is only now.

Your entire life can change

in five minutes.

Less.

- Charlotte.

- l can't decide

which looks less appealing.

- l got to talk to you.

- Did she decide

to keep the baby?

- l don't know.

lt's not about that.

l think we should sit down.

So...

a long time ago,

when l was a lot younger,

before you were born,

l did something,

some things,

that l'm not entirely...

Let me rephrase that.

- Drugs?

- No, not drugs.

lt's not that kind of a story.

l mean, l have done drugs,

but that's not what l...

You know l love you

above and beyond words.

l would never abandon you.

- l know, Mom.

- What?

- l said, "l know."

- What did you say after that?

- l found my birth certificate

a couple weeks ago.

What?

Why didn't you say so?

- l don't-

l don't know.

l guess...

l guess l felt bad

for Mo-l mean Addy.

- She's still your mom too.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

And as soon as she's better,

we're gonna decide

how to work this.

But l wanted

to talk to you first,

because, first and foremost,

l wanted so see

if you'll take me back

as your mom.

l'm reapplying for the job.

- l'm a lot of work.

- l know.

- Excuse me, Miss Hunter.

Your sister's out of the OR.

You can both go see her now.

- Thank you.

- After Addy gets better,

can we all go on a road trip?

- Great idea.

- Can Elektra come too?

- We can ask her.

- l think she's gonna keep

the baby.

- You do?

How come?

- Because l tested her earlier.

l asked her

if she wanted to smoke,

and she said she couldn't.

- Very sneaky.

- Besides, if she has the baby,

then she can quit her job,

because she'll be a millionaire.

- Huh.

When did you get to be

so clever?

- Genetic, l guess.

Speaking of which,

when are going to tell me

about my dad?

- Hmm.

What do you want to know?

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