Yankee Doodle Dandy Page #9

Happy?

It's a wonderful second-act curtain.

Send copies of this

to all the New York papers.

Extra! Lusitania torpedoed

by German sub! Extra!

This is it, George.

And we were worried about

the success or failure of a show.

Now we've really got

something to worry about.

Seems it always happens.

Whenever we get too high-hat,

too sophisticated for flag-waving...

... some thug nation decides we're

a pushover, all ready to be blackjacked.

And before long we're looking up anxiously

to be sure the flag's still waving over us.

Left foot.

Right foot.

On your toes.

I used to be a model.

You'll look awful pretty peeling potatoes.

- On your way, wise guy.

- Next.

Left foot.

Right foot.

Take this paper and report

to Sgt. Cooper for your examination.

Next. Name, please.

Oh. George M. Cohan.

Occupation:

Actor, author, composer and producer.

Address:

Devonshire Hotel.

- How do you know so much about me?

- Don't you recognize me, Mr. Cohan?

I was a clerk at the Friars Club.

- Age:
39.

- Doesn't even give me a chance to lie.

Thirty-nine? I'm sorry, Mr. Cohan.

You're overage. Thirty-one's the limit now.

What's 8 or 9 years? The Germans

won't ask me for a birth certificate.

Oh, I know how you feel, Mr. Cohan.

But you've got to be young and tough.

It's no picnic. All those hardships,

the mental strain...

...trenches,

the fighting, the marching.

- The ma'am-selles.

- I hope.

No, you'll never be able to stand it.

Hardships and physical strain?

You don't know what you're talking about.

This war's a coffee klatch compared

to a musical show.

I'd like to see one of you do what I do in a

performance and be on your feet at the end.

I'll give you an idea of what I mean.

Thank you very much

for your entertainment, Mr. Cohan.

But I'm afraid we have more need

of you here than over there.

But that'll make the war last a year longer.

- Goodbye, Mr. Cohan.

- Thank you, major. Thank you.

Pick it up, soldier.

Keep singing, Nora.

- Where are the lights?

- I suppose the generator's gone again.

Hit your lights and play them on the stage

so we can keep going, will you?

Boys, hit your lights and keep them on

the singer until the others come up, will you?

Everybody sing!

We'd won the world war.

Manhattan went wild with postwar hysteria.

But I spiked my shows with prewar stuff.

The sentiment and humor an older

America had aged in the wood.

Still, it was lonely on the main stem.

Mother and Josie were gone.

Dad was by himself on the farm

and had grown very old.

Every night I went to the theater,

I expected a phone call.

Well, finally, it came.

You'd better give him two more cc's.

May as well try to make him

as comfortable as possible.

Yes, doctor.

If you have to get

back to town, Dr. Llewellyn...

...l'll be here all night.

- It's all right. I'll wait till George gets here.

- Cigarette, doctor?

- Yes, I will. Thanks.

I remember I was a kid in medical college in

Baltimore when I first saw The Four Cohans.

They were a great act.

Yes, they were.

I always thought George M.'s sister

was the loveliest dancer I'd ever seen.

I can't help thinking

a theatrical era is dying in there.

His sister and his mother gone

and now the old man.

In some ways, I think he was

the best performer of the lot.

Well, I'd settle for his age.

There never was anything dull

about his life, either.

And he's lived to see his son

an American institution.

I'd settle for that too.

- Hello, doc.

- Hello, Mr. Cohan.

- How is he?

- Resting quietly.

I think you'd better go in alone.

We can't... We can't do that.

Wait till George gets here.

- Where's George?

- Here I am, Dad. Here I am.

Oh, that's good.

I'm glad you came.

The booking office has

been calling up all day...

...and they want us to play Des Moines...

No, don't worry about that.

We're not going to. I've canceled it.

We're gonna pick it up on the way back.

- How'd it go tonight?

- Oh, fine. Fine. Yeah.

It's not every kid that gets

a chance to play Peck's Bad Boy.

That's right.

Were you...? Were you nervous?

Did you remember your lines?

Oh, sure. Every one.

I can lick any kid in town.

Don't you upstage your mother,

or I'll whale the tar out of you.

Oh, don't worry, Dad.

I'll never do that.

I'll play the show

with one foot in the trough.

No, no. We'll be billed as The Four Cohans.

You're not going to break up the act.

Don't worry, Dad. They never will.

We won't let them. Won't let them.

- How many curtain calls did you take?

- Six. Six curtains.

- That's pretty good for a drama.

- Yeah.

- Did you make a speech?

- I thanked them for us.

I said, "My mother thanks you.

My father thanks you.

My sister thanks you.

And I thank you."

Well...

...it was a good combination, Sam.

Worked well for a long time.

Now that it's all over, who was the senior

partner and who was the junior partner?

You mean who was Dietz

and who was Goff?

I'll bet it was the first firm in the history of

show business to have two senior partners.

- You know how I feel, don't you, Sam?

- Sure. I understand.

When Dad died, with him went

the last link with The Four Cohans.

All the backslapping and the applause,

well, became unimportant. No more fun in it.

Didn't mean anything anymore

with Dad, Mom and Josie gone.

So Mary and I are going away

to enjoy ourselves...

...visit all those places

we've always wanted to see.

Old theaters where nobody

ever even heard of us.

You'll have to go to Timbuktu.

Got it booked.

George, you've always been

the one with the words.

I never was much of a hand at saying things.

But we've done more than

make a lot of money.

And lose a little.

Sometimes friends drift apart.

Let's not let that happen to us.

No matter how legal dissolution

of this partnership is, Sam...

...50? of me will

always be in this office.

I'll remember that when the rent is due.

You'll be more successful than ever.

But if ever the rent does come due,

and you can't meet it, well...

And, by the same token, if I get stuck

in Madagascar, you'll hear from me.

You'd better get out of here.

That ship will sail without you.

Seasick pills.

I won't go to the boat with you.

You know how red my nose gets.

We thought you guys weren't

speaking to each other.

Can we have a picture of you

tearing up your contract?

Well, that's impossible.

We never had a written contract.

The only contract we've ever had:

Hold that pose, will you?

We want to show it to our legal department.

Life was less full, but it was

by no means empty.

I still had Mary.

A playmate as well as a helpmate.

We set out to rubberneck at the world.

Nelson Monument. It's a good thing

I wasn't born an Englishman.

With the history their flag has,

I'd have waved myself to death.

Oh, George.

I didn't know you could yodel.

Learned it on the farm.

Nothing but hog-calling with frost on it.

It takes two men to impersonate

a horse on Broadway.

And you always have trouble

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