Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow Page #6

- Can I use your phone?

- Over there.

- The phone.

Miss, get me Bologna.

It's very urgent.

This is 577-000

Come on, it's easy.

Six numbers.

It'll take her until Christmas.

I'll stay here tonight.

Hello? Yes, Dad, it's me.

Why, oh why

Do you always leave me alone

On Sundays

To go and watch the soccer game

Why, oh why

Yes, I went.

No, Dad.

The permit's not ready.

They're all good-for-nothings here.

At the ministry they scratch their asses.

Why don't you take me with you just once

Yes, I went to see the undersecretary.

He refused to see me.

You'll see. I'll settle it tonight.

It only needs stamping.

Calm down, Dad.

But I'm not an idiot!

Goddamn

I've really got to run.

No, don't kiss me!

I won't let you go!

Just look! There isn't a single thing

wrong with you.

Make a face or I can't go.

No, don't do that!

It turns me on even more!

Bye-bye, darling.

Where is your seminary?

At Anagni,

but the main office is in Lombardy.

- How many hours do you study?

- Twelve hours.

My goodness!

Five hours of meditation and prayer a day,

seven hours of study.

When do you get to have fun?

There's a recess after lunch,

and an hour in the evening.

My nephew's with the friars.

They say the rosary at midnight.

The Capuchins follow that practice.

No, thank you.

You aren't allowed to smoke?

I saw a bishop with a pipe once.

It's forbidden at seminary.

You really make me

want to go to confession

in this lovely moonlight.

I couldn't hear it. I'm not a priest yet.

I have two more years

before I take my vows.

- You're already dressed like a priest.

- But I'm not.

I love the color black.

I wear it on top and underneath.

Say,

is it true that

when the council is over

priests will be able to marry?

No, I don't believe so.

American priests have children.

But I don't like that.

For me, priests should be like the moon:

Nobody really knows what they are.

They're men with a religious vocation.

My nephew's vocation

was beaten into him by his mother.

You like it?

Yes, but I'm free to decide for myself.

There's plenty of time before I take my vows.

I'll pray to my saint.

- Which one?

- Saint John.

Mine is a saint nobody knows.

Saint Maurillo. Do you know him?

No.

I need a saint who doesn't get pestered,

one who has time for me.

I always ask him to let me

make lots of money.

Does he answer you?

Pretty well.

But I don't care for my profession.

What do you do?

Manicures.

But I pick my clients.

Respectable people who pay well.

I want to buy my father some land.

The hands I've seen!

I can judge people by their hands.

Let me see yours.

You're level-headed and you like sports.

I used to play inside right

Umberto, there's a great destiny here.

- I can tell you're kind.

- How can you tell?

By everything.

You're predestined!

My God, how straight that line is.

You can ask anything of life.

I'd like to go out with you tomorrow.

Yes, arm-in-arm.

Think of the neighbors.

Think of your grandmother.

And dressed up like a priest!

But I have a suit. It's a bit old...

We'll go to the sea.

I'd like that,

now that it's not so crowded.

We'd stay there all day.

I'll bring some sandwiches.

We'll see. We'll see.

Oh, kitty!

Come here, you.

I'm supposed to leave tomorrow,

but I can be a day late.

- When will you be back?

- At Christmas.

I'll stop by my grandparents'

on my way to see my parents.

I'll think it over tonight

about going to the sea.

Kitty, sweet kitty.

I wonder who he belongs to.

From time to time he comes to see me.

You're so cute.

It was so nice out here.

I'll wait for you, If you like.

This one will be here for some time.

He's come to town

from Bologna for business.

I'll wait here until dawn.

Take the cat.

There you go.

Bye.

Good night.

- Umberto, why aren't you in bed?

- Coming, Grandmother.

Excuse me.

- Good evening, ma'am.

- I don't know you.

You do now.

I don't know you, nor does my grandson.

Umberto, go to bed.

Good night, miss.

I'll have a wall built here.

Thank goodness he's leaving tomorrow.

Grandmother, I won't leave

unless you apologize to the young lady!

Over my dead body.

I'm sorry, miss.

Don't mention it.

Leave the boy alone.

He's not like the men

who come to your house.

This boy is a saint.

Only respectable and important people

come to my house!

That one who's ringing now,

do you know who he is?

The son of the Labor Minister Rusconi!

A fine thing.

Members of congress

come to my house too!

Imagine that.

Even Tommasi, the pasta producer.

I see you eat Tommasi pasta.

I won't anymore.

Tomorrow I'll send a petition around

to all the neighbors.

Everybody will sign it.

You'll leave the building.

We're fed up with this coming and going.

You're a scandal.

Yesterday I counted four men!

Do you want me to have a curfew?

A meter like a taxi?

Three yes and four no?

My clients are polite,

well-behaved people.

You'll go to hell, mark my words.

Shame on you. I'll report you!

Stop it, Grandmother!

You're an old goose!

Did you hear that, Vincenzo? Umberto!

You old witch.

What does she want from me?

Vincenzo, come here.

Her and that other old goat!

She'll report me.

She'll send me to hell. Jesus.

Listen to this one.

All right, all right. I heard you!

At last! I was starting to worry.

Why ring like that?

- Gorgeous!

- Come on in.

I thought there had been a gas leak.

God forbid!

Kitty. Is he new?

I'll show that old witch.

I'll fix that boy, you'll see.

What boy? What witch?

The one next door.

She hates me for talking to her grandson.

It's crazy. As if I'd go with a priest.

- What priest?

- He isn't even 18.

We're talking about God

and serious matters,

and she says I'll go to hell.

She's given me a headache.

Take no notice of her:

Do no evil, fear no evil.

She says she'll tell the landlady.

What difference does it make?

Landladies are sympathetic.

- At worst, they'll raise your rent.

- As if I didn't pay enough already!

But that granny will be crying

tears of blood, you'll see.

You must try to understand.

Come here, come to Uncle.

As if I felt like making love

at a time like this!

Come on, Mara.

We'll go to bed and cuddle up together

like good children.

- We won't even talk.

- I need to talk and let off steam.

Okay, but in bed?

I'm too mad. I'd be like a stone.

Be honest, am I a scandal?

Do I do it on the terrace?

Fine by me.

I'm willing to go out on the terrace.

Like Nero looking over Rome.

Don't I always ask everybody...

not to shout, to speak quietly?

But when you yell,

you sound like a donkey!

Because I'm different.

I love you.

I think you're perfect.

- Do you love me?

- Here.

''I love you.''

- Let's run away together.

- Who's chasing us?

I don't like you going with other men.

Now I'm jealous.

Then marry me.

What for?

Why don't you come to Bologna

for a month or two?

I won't budge from here.

The old witch would love that.

In fact, I'll buy this apartment.

That way she'll be stuck with me forever.

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