You Were Never Lovelier Page #2

She froze those boys.

Papa, you've just got

to do something about her.

Pardon me, could you please tell me

where I could find Mr. Acuna?

He went inside.

On second thought,

I guess old el groucho can wait.

Don't these overdone weddings

bore you to death? They kill me.

I say if two people want

to get married, let them.

They don't have to go through

a shindig like this. It's murder.

Oh, well, I'll admit my attempt

at conversation wasn't so hot.

Shall I try again?

It's a nice day, isn't it?

The air's nice.

And there seems to be

an abundance of it.

Say, look, would you mind very much

if I tear myself away from you?

No.

But you don't understand.

Now, let's hear no more about Maria.

Run along, girls.

May I see you a moment, please?

It's very important to both of us.

I'm Robert Davis.

I came here to dance and...

Hello.

Now, what is there about that girl

that made you go...?

She's beautiful.

She's beautiful, all right.

But she has a personality

like the inside of a refrigerator.

In addition to which,

she is my daughter.

She is? She is?!

She is. Now, what was it

you wanted of me?

Just your permission to go out

and hang myself.

Fernando.

Fernando!

Fernando!

What?

Were you sleeping again?

Tell me, my dear Fernando,

why do I put up with you?

I don't know, Mr. Acuna...

...unless it's because I'm your

third cousin on your wife's side.

Ah, yes. Did you get Mrs. Castro?

Mrs. Castro is on her way here.

All right.

Now go back to sleep, Fernando.

I dare you to!

- Hi, Fernando.

- Good morning, Mr. Davis.

It's good to hear the voice

of a human being again. Sit down?

No, thanks. I'd like to see

Mr. Acuna if he's not busy.

This morning he's nervous.

He probably won't see you.

- How'd you make out?

- Oh, fine.

I opened my mouth too wide

and kept it open too long.

I want to apologize to the old boy.

Mr. Robert Davis wants

to see you, Mr. Acuna.

I don't lik e Mr. Robert Davis.

I don't want to see him.

Advise him to go back to New York

and don't be subtle.

Throw him out!

But look, Mr. Acuna, I just...

This is the first time anything

like this has ever happened to me.

Oh, lady.

Better not to go in there. Nervous.

- Good morning, Maria.

- Eduardo.

I'm a worried man. Maria,

besides having the same name...

...you and my Maria have a lot

in common, haven't you?

Well, I'm her godmother,

we should have.

Would you say she has a personality

like the inside of a refrigerator?

I certainly would not.

But she freezes men to death.

She turns on that sophistication...

Sophistication, fiddlesticks!

Maria's as old-fashioned

as a hoop skirt.

Ridiculous! I know my own daughter.

You think you know

your own daughter.

I know there's something wrong.

She hasn't fallen in love

since she was 15...

...when she got starry-eyed about

that silly knight on a white horse.

- Lochinvar?

- Yes.

You'd think she'd have outgrown

a tin hero by now.

She's probably waiting

for a myth to come to life.

Oh, nonsense! Will you stop thinking

of Maria as a child? She's a woman.

I know women. They all fall in love

with an illusion. I'll get her over that.

Will you leave Maria alone

and stop worrying?

Someday, a man will come along

who will stir her imagination.

How?

By doing something

more romantic than the others.

Such as?

Well, perhaps by sending her flowers

from an "unknown admirer"...

...intriguing her

with just the right kind of note.

Fernando! Get the two most

beautiful orchids you can find.

Bring them here for a note

to be attached.

Eduardo, don't you meddle with this.

If I don't do something,

she'll get hurt.

I won't stand by and let her waste the

best years of her life chasing knights.

Have you gone crazy?

You can't manufacture romance.

I'll create an unknown admirer

and see what happens.

I'll use my left hand

to disguise my writing. Clever?

You think you have the answer

for everything.

What if she falls in love

with your imaginary lover?

Don't worry. If the orchids

and notes intrigue her...

...l'll furnish the young man myself.

She'll never know the difference.

Dearly beloved...

Eduardo, I'm warning you.

- Papa! Hello, Aunt Maria.

- Hello.

What are you doing here?

Must I have an invitation

to my own home for tea?

- Is that you, Eduardo?

- Yes, yes.

What on earth are you doing here?

You'd think my only privilege

in this house was paying the bills.

Aunt Maria, it's good to see you.

- Wasn't that the doorbell?

- Expecting somebody, Papa?

No, why should I be expecting

somebody? Sit down, Maria.

Thank you.

I'm really upset with your son, Maria...

...and with your daughter Julia,

Eduardo!

I went to the hotel

where they're honeymooning.

- What for? In the name of all...

- Don't speak when I'm interrupting.

To see if there was anything

I could do for them.

As if there would be.

I thought they'd want to discuss what

they intend to do on their honeymoon.

But they sent down word

they weren't in.

Perhaps they weren't, Delfina.

At the same time, they also sent down

for a bottle of champagne.

- I felt like...

- Wasn't that the doorbell?

Something's wrong with Papa.

He's always hearing bells.

Well, well, well! Orchids.

Shame on Tony.

He should save his money.

- How do you know they're not for me?

- Bring me the flowers, Cecy.

Why, there's a card inside.

Nobody ever sends me flowers.

After a woman gets married...

...her husband decides

she can't smell anymore.

Now, don't get that martyred look.

They're for Maria.

- For Maria?

- Why, they... They are for Maria.

Well, somebody's

just trying to be funny.

"Dearly beloved,

I send you orchids..."

- Let Maria read her own card.

- Go ahead, Mama.

It probably ends up with a joke.

"...because my heart is no longer mine,

now that I have seen you.

Be kind to these orchids.

It is not their fault that they can

never be as lovely as you."

Why, it brought tears to my eyes.

That note was written by a man

with a sensitive soul.

It sounded pretty silly to me.

A charming man sends you the most

beautiful note ever written...

...and you say it sounds silly?

"Your unknown suitor." And I don't

think much of his handwriting.

Well, perhaps he's left-handed.

How does this card strike you,

Aunt Maria?

If it had been sent to me

and I didn't know who'd written it...

...I should think it was pretty silly.

- Aunt Maria's right.

Whoever he is,

he'll have to do better than that.

Let me see the card, Maria, please.

- What are you two whispering about?

- Well, l...

I was saying that if that note

didn't warm Maria's heart...

...the next one, I believe,

may well start a flame within her.

Why, Eduardo, you remind me

of our courting days.

He was always telling me

how I lit a flame in him.

Sometimes I wonder

if it hasn't gone out.

I'll have you know that

I'm twice the man I was.

I would settle for half the man

you were, dear.

Here are the love lyrics you wanted.

The love songs and

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