Ziegfeld Follies

Saturday, September 25th:

Another heavenly day.

Yes.

It's always a heavenly day.

Every day is perfect.

Nothing but happiness.

Yes, happiness,

happiness, happiness.

I have everything that any man

or angel could desire.

Beautiful memories of the past.

Pictures, toys...

Toys.

Children play

with the dreams of tomorrow...

...and old men play

with the memories of yesterday.

Broadway.

Broadway I can see it again.

The Broadway of 1907.

The Broadway

that was waiting for me.

An innocent world

believing in a golden future.

Full of peace and laughter

and beautiful girls.

And here's the theater

where my first Follies opened.

As I look at that theater now,

it's all mine forever.

No taxes, no bills,

and no competitors.

There they are. My first public.

The high and mighty,

and the hoi polloi.

And here, they're all mine.

Eternal toys that never grow older.

Look at Mrs. Astor in her beautiful

carriage with her famous horse.

Much more famous

that night than Ziegfeld.

And didn't the horse know it.

And Diamond Jim Brady

with no horse...

... but what a filly inside the car.

There they are, an old New York

first-night audience...

... the judge and the jury.

"What have you got, Mr. Ziegfeld?

Show us your magic, if you dare.

Make us dream, if you can.

What have you got, Mr. Ziegfeld?"

Anna Held Hourglass Girls.

Thank you, Mrs. Astor.

I can pretend all my great stars

never grew older...

... are still dancing and singing

as they did years ago.

Marilyn Miller.

Fanny Brice.

Look at me, oh, look at me

Ho, I'm an Indian

Aha, I'm an Indian

Will Rogers.

Well...

What will I talk about?

I ain't got anything funny to say.

- All I know is what I read in the paper.

- Eddie Cantor.

If you knew Susie

Like I know Susie

Oh, oh, oh, what a girl

There's none so classy

As this fair lassie

Oh, oh, holy Moses

What a chassis

We went riding

She didn't balk

Back from Yonkers

I'm the one who had to walk

If you knew Susie

Like I know Susie

Oh, oh, what a girl

I can hear the applause as if

it hadn't disappeared into the past.

The New York night

still burns for me...

... with the names

I have branded into its sky.

Great shows that were part

of the dreams of America.

How many millions of people today

remember their courtships...

... their honeymoons,

their anniversaries...

... their happiest moments

in terms of a Ziegfeld show?

The world would never forget

the Ziegfeld Follies.

Those were the good old days.

And yet, I wonder.

Are those days really over?

Just because I moved up here

did the Follies have to die too?

Couldn't there be a new Follies?

No, no, I suppose not.

After all, how could there be

a Ziegfeld Follies without Ziegfeld?

What I would give to be able

to put on one more Follies.

Yes.

So many personalities

down there to choose from.

Great personalities from my day,

and great ones that have come up since.

How would I open?

Let's see.

I'd like a crayon and paper.

Thank you.

I think I'd open with a pink number.

Yes, a beautiful pink number...

...with a beautiful

pink and white, blue-eyed girl.

Yes. And maybe to introduce

the whole thing...

Well, who would be better

than my old friend Fred Astaire?

A great star, Freddie.

I'd be taking no chances with him.

And I know Freddie would say

something very nice about me.

What can I say about Ziegfeld?

Well, I can only tell you

that as long as there's a dance...

...a song, a musical show

and it's good...

...somewhere around or in it

is Ziegfeld.

He never cared so much

about villains, plots, stories.

The Follies never had a story.

The Ziegfeld Follies was itself

a story of an era.

If it was gay, bright, beautiful...

...that's how Ziggy wanted it.

And, oh, I almost forgot:

The girls.

Ziggy was a specialist

at glorifying girls.

That's one of the most important

things about the Follies, you know.

So...

Here's to the beautiful ladies

Here's to those wonderful girls

Adeles and Mollys

Lucilles and Pollys

You'll find them all

In the Ziegfeld Follies

Here's to the silks and the satins

Here's to the diamonds and pearls

This is the mixture

To start the picture

So bring on the beautiful girls

Here's to the silks and the satins

Here's to the diamonds and pearls

A sweet endeavor

A joy forever

So bring on the beautiful girls

Here's to the beautiful ladies

Here's to those wonderful girls

Adeles and Mollys

Lucilles and Pollys

You'll find them all

In the Ziegfeld Follies

Here's to the silks and the satins

Here's to the diamonds and pearls

A joy forever

A sweet endeavor

To bring on the beautiful girls

This is the mixture

To start the picture

So bring on the beautiful girls

All this yap-yap-yap

About glorifying dames

Leaves me like a cold potato

I'd much rather be

With a handsome he

Like Van Johnson

Who's a real tomato

For a date with Fred MacMurray

You can bet your life I'd hurry

And a guy like Mischa Auer

Has me completely in his power

In fact most any man I've seen

Is the only man for me

Bring on those wonderful men

Bring me an elegant guy

A soldier or sailor

A Gable or Taylor

A short or a tall one

I just wanna call one

My own, private wonderful he

Bring what you can to me

Bring me a guy to pin up

Bring me a prince on a horse

A dark or a light one

I just want to sight one

Who'll call me his missis

And give with the kisses

I'm afraid I've a terrible yen

For those wonderful M-E-N

Amor, Amor

There must be someone for me

But what's he waiting for?

No hope, no soap

If he don't appear

I fear I'm at the end of my rope

Oh, bring on a male who ain't frail

Bring on a man from a cave

Someone to relax with

And pay income tax with

And though he's from hunger

I'm not getting younger

And I'd like to get on with my plan

To glorify the American man

I know the men are few

But what's a gal to do?

I'll get a man before I'm through

Hey, you in the third row:

Bring on those wonderful men

Could you tell me

where the telephone is, please?

Oh, thank you.

Say, could you tell?

- Number, please.

- Oh, operator...

...I would like Plaza 5-5597, please.

- Plaza 5-5597? One moment, please.

- That's right.

Thank you.

- Hello.

- Oh, hello. Louis?

What number you want?

Plaza 5-5597.

Well, this is Morningside 3-3333.

- Oh, I'm terribly sorry.

- Drop dead, will you?

Yeah. I'll do that.

- Operator.

- Number, please.

Operator, you got me

the wrong number.

I wanted Plaza 5-5597,

and you got me...

One moment, please.

I'll get you the Complaint Department.

You don't have to get me

the Complaint...

- Hello, Complaint Department?

- Complaint Department.

- Hello, Beth, how are you?

- No, look, you...

- Boy, have I got a head.

- Went to the Strand last night...

... and saw cute Van Johnson

in 30 Seconds Over Japan.

Did you like that picture?

I liked it.

When the airplanes went over...

A fellow had one leg.

Handsome, brave...

Van Johnson is just divine.

Operator!

Number, please.

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