10 Rules for Sleeping Around Page #3

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Ah!

If i had popped the question,

we'd probably on our second kid?

Oh really?

I've been invited to the Dolce La Vita Ball.

You made the guest list?

Yeah.

-One sec.

Sorry, my best friend Cameron is going to that,

i hear it's the party of the year.

Come with me.

He can stick it to me anytime.

I would love to, but..

I can't.

Baby, i'm home.

Hey, honey.

Babe?

What the hell..

Hey.

-Hey.

Where were you?

I was running errands, why?

I've been calling you.

Why are you so dressed up?

I'm not.

Better question, what is with this $1700 dress?

We haven't closed the deal yet.

Relax, it's not even mine.

I'm just returning it for a friend, Ben.

So, what did you..

Ask me about?

The Hampton house,

i thought maybe..

I should take a loan out on it.

A loan?

To offer Emma Cooney a huge advance

on her book.

Why?

Jeffery Field is gonna try and steal our deal.

Unfortunately..

I maxed out the equity we paid for the remodeling.

Jesus Christ!

What did that rip off decorator charge you?

Nevermind, you know what?

Let's just hope that Vince

talks her into it.

He's on his way up there..

-What?

Ben, you should have asked me.

I'll find the money.

-No, about Vince. You shouldn't just let him stay at the house without asking me.

Why is that?

Cause it's a mess.

Vince would live in a leper colony to close a deal.

Is there something else going on?

Ben, don't be silly, it's just..

I would appreciate it if you consulted me

on things that were mine.

Last night, i thought it was our nest egg.

You went ahead and you spend without talking to me.

Vince, via text, what is IW2..

SUTWTC means?

I want to screw you til your toes curl.

Oh my God.

Lucky you, who's texting you?

Vince, i think she's cheating.

-Calm down.

Sh*t..

Cameron, you idiot.

No, you didn't.

She's wearing night time make up

and it's morning.

Taxi! taxi!

Come on, why don't you stop?

Off to the Hamptons?

Can you take me to the Hamptons?

Hamptons?

-How much for the Hamptons?

No way..

Not the threesome i had in mind.

Baby, i gotta go.

I'm pulling off to Field's mansion now.

Alright, i'm just gonna go the cottage, hurry.

She is the freaking hottest thing

that you have ever seen.

Duncan, i'm telling you.

I'm banging a real cougar tonight.

She's like 28-29 years old.

And she's a real cougar.

No way, no way.

-You'll see her at the party.

Boo yeah!

Hey baby..

Upstairs.

No, no..

We're gonna go right here.

I'm taking you from the couch.

Wow..

Not gonna need these anymore.

Oh my God, you have the prettiest feet i have ever seen.

And i've seen a lot of feet.

It's like two basketballs

hiding under your skirt.

You always this aggresive?

Don't interrupt my skill.

It's time for some butt bongo, baby.

I want to worship your ass.

Aw..

Have you seen Owen?

Yes, he left on an errand,

saying something about the fa grua..

I think a little too much pistachio.

Your guest?

-Go and get your door for Miss Cooney.

Emma. My darling.

Mon Rocchie is chilled, the berries are freshly baked.

You settle in..

And you get ready for a fabulous feta.

After spending a wet winter, freezing my bum off at Sussex,

i'm more than ready.

Take Miss Cooney's things to the lake house.

I have to get ready for the suarrey.

My son is coming home from Andover,

i'm planning a little surprise for him.

You just make yourself at home..

I am so thrilled you're here.

I'm thrilled to be here.

See you.

-Thank you so much.

Crashing this joint is a piece of cake.

Emma Conney, here i come.

Hi, it's Gabriella,

missing you.

Gaby, if you get this,

get out of the house!

Just stay with me,

let your staff do the work.

Are you kidding?

It's the most important event of my career.

Please.

I'll do the thing with my big toe.

You remind me of my aunt.

Only hotter.

Your body is banging.

Oh my God, you are too cool for words.

And way too hot for clothes.

I told you that i have a surprise..

For you.

-Oh my God!

Oh my God!

-Nice surprise.

Kate, what are you doing here?

One second, pitstop,

but don't worry ladies..

My engine is revved up

and i'm ready to go.

How old is he?

Old enough.

He's gotta go, Vince is here to meet Cooney,

the deal is in trouble, he will be here any minute.

What?

Why don't you call me?

Do you hear me now?

-Sh*t!

Oh my God!

Put it out!

Oh my God, your hand!

What are you doing?

-Putting the fire out!

I'm naked, i'm hitting it.

And then her girlfriend walks in.

No way!

Not one, but two hot and horny cougars!

Excuse me, excuse me..

Can you come over here please?

-Yeah, hi.

Who are you with?

-I'm with the guys.

The guys?

Yeah.

Just doing my thing.

Your thing?

That's cool, cause i thought that you might be

a sneaky snake sneaking in.

Why would i sneak in?

I'm already here.

Doing what?

Landscaping?

Skimming the pool?

Okay, moaching.

Decorating.

Breaking and entering.

You don't understand.

Is that because you think i make $12 an hour with no benefits, i'm an idiot?

Or maybe because you think i'm black?

Guess what, I'm Dominican.

Really?

-Let's go.

I'm here to see Emma Cooney.

Who?

-Emma Cooney.

You're here to see me?

Yes!

Hi, glad to see you.

Vince.. Ben Roberts, Family Quality Publishing.

You're gonna meet my partner Vince on Monday, yes..

-Yes.

Of course.

I got a little place down the beach,

310 Hampton Road..

Come buy for a sunset cocktail.

I'd love to, but i've only just arrived.

I look forward to meeting Vince on Monday..

If you're here tonight,

do say hello.

Ta..

-Ta!

Da.. See?

She said if i'd..

Not invite.

Go.

You better get the guys to this party.

They are in for the shock of their lives.

Done, i am there.

Hey, Hugh right now is banging cougar.

He's banging cougar right now.

What are we gonna tell Hugh?

What's that noise?

What noise?

-Did you hear that?

When are you gonna stop this gay masquarade?

There are straight 500 designers.

Now can you let me make the bed?

It's a shame nobody sees you for the man you really are.

Every woman wants to believe she's got the magic to turn a gay man straight.

Owen, is that you.

-Admit it, you sh*t.

I want more down, it's disgusting.

It's like chicken feathers.

-Owen!

Kate!

What are you doing here?

I told you i would call you Monday,

the house is not ready for you to see yet.

Who's this?

-Who are you?

Who are they?

-What's going on?

Who's asking?

-No more questions.

I am Owen Manners, i am Kate's personal lifestylers..

Kate, shoo shoo, your hair is a disaster.

Look at this flyaway, my god you need some hair serum.

Nice to meet you,

how are you?

This is Gabriella.

She is..

Benny's houseguest.

Benny?

So, this is what Benny had in mind.

A threesome with this chiquita.

Global warming in this room

is affecting my chi.

Ciao!

I'm gonna call Benny right now..

We're gonna sort this out.

Fine, it's his house.

-It's my house!

He told me i could stay here

to write my book.

You're a writer?

-Yes.

Like John Gris-ham.

Right.

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