3 Blind Saints Page #7

Synopsis: To avoid time in jail, three wily men agree to be ministers at a local church. While bungling through their duties, they uncover a greedy plot to steal from the church. When they try to rescue the church, the men wind up getting rescued in a God encounter they never expected.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): John Eschenbaum
Production: FilmWorks Entertainment
 
IMDB:
5.3
PG
Year:
2011
89 min
Website
31 Views


Wake up, wake up!

- [Sister] What in the name

of holy creation happened to him?

- Ah!

- Ah!

- Hold on!

Give me another chance!

- Sam, honey!

- Unhand me!

- It's just your friend Jamal!

- What happened?

- I was working with Mr.Patterson, the maintenance man,

and I had the screwdriverand I was working and zap!

Electricity shot outand jumped all over me!

- Oh honey, there is no electricity.

The electricity been out all evening

and there's no Mr. Patterson either.

- Oh no, no, he washere and we were working

and I was blind!

Couldn't see a thing!

And then there was thunderand there was lightning!

- Well did the lightninghit you upside the head

'cause you look crazy, man!

- We need some lights in here.

- Jamal, help me up.

I'm sorry, I thought you were Satan.

Hey Jamal, listen.

- Look man, you are out of your mind!

- Stop it!

Something's out there.

- What?

What's out there?

Oh the cops, they out there, oh!

Oh Rusty, Rusty, Rusty's out there!

- Well he's out there but that'snot what I'm talking about.

- Oh those cops they got Frankie!

The cops that got Frankie?

- No, no, no, no!

It's not out there, out there.

Out there, up there!

- What?

- The whole God thing, man.

It's real!

All that God stuff that we've been trying

to fake our wake our way through?

It's real!

- I know that's real!

God is real, brother.

I believe in God!

You don't believe in God!

- I do now!

- What?

- Ha!

I found the real thing tonight, Jamal!

Or it found me or something, man,

but all I know is Ifinally feel like I know

what I'm supposed to doand who I'm supposed to be!

- Oh man would you pleasehook a brother up, man,

'cause you got me so daggone confused!

- Okay, follow this.

Rusty and Beverly havebeen using us as decoys.

They've been stealingmoney from this church

and they're gonna tear the thing down.

- What?

- So they can build like this

jumbo mega mall sports church thing!

- What?

- And you and me and Frankie,we're gonna stop 'em.

- And me and you and Frankie,me, you, and Frankie?

Where is Frankie, man?

We don't even know whereFrankie is anymore!

- We're gonna find him too!

Because Rusty's got him.

I know it!

- Rusty?

- Rusty's after us, man.

We gotta figure out a way to get to Rusty.

What we need is a plan.

- We get a plan!

- We get a plan.

That's what we gotta do.

Let's think.

- Let's think, let's think.

- Hey, y'all talking aboutno good Rusty Pickens?

- Every man's got a weakness.

- Well I know what his weakness is.

As long as I've known him

his weakness has beenpretty girls and skirts.

- Well that makes me

(drum hit)

- What's wrong?

- I'm listening.

- What's he doing?

- Finish!

Alright, I'll do it.

I'm not gonna like it.

But I'll do it.

- Whatcha gonna do?

- I believe God just gave us a plan.

(instrumental country music)

What a rustic establishment.

- We're closed.

- Ah, fiddlesticks.

- Hello, ladies.

What can we do for you?

Come on in.

- Don't mind if we do.

Excuse me young man.

Well I would love a tall glass of water.

- What about you, little lady?

- Oh let me get a little chocolate milk.

- Milk?

- Yeah, make it dirty, baby.

- Oh, tough girl, huh?

I like that.

I was about to close up here.

- Oh.

- How would you girls like to stick around

for a little private party?

(slaps Sam)

- Oh!

That was rude.

- Heard that.

Can't believe you got me into this.

- This was his idea, remember?

- You want us to stick around with you?

- Oh no, you boys lock up and go on home.

- Well would it have killedyou to shave the beard?

- Yes!

- I can take care of theselittle ladies by myself.

- Okay.

- Come on, ladies.

Let's get this party started.

- Well who put a nickel in you?

Come on brown sugar!

- I like the sound of that.

Woo hoo!

- You don't mind if I set my purse down.

- He's out shaking it.

(upbeat rock music)

- [Rusty] Ooh ee, I can'twait to see what comes next.

- Oh it's a surprise.

- [Rusty] Oh I love surprises.

- Really?

Well what do you thinkabout this surprise?

Boom.

- Bam!

How you like us now?

(all laughing)

- Oh gentlemen, I knewit was you all along.

- Oh yeah.

- That's a very funny jokeand you can untie me now.

- Oh no, after what you did to Frankie?

You about to see what thefive fingers said to the face!

- That's not necessary!

I didn't mean any harm.

I just asked Officer Marrowto detain him a little bit.

- Detain him?

- [Jamal] Detain him?

- So our little Frankie is rotting away

right now as we speak insome miserable jail cell?

- You got any twos?

- Any twos?

Nope, go fish!

- You better not be messin' with him!

- I just need to make onephone call to get him released!

- Hmm.

- My phone is in my pocket.

- Get that phone, Sam, get the phone.

- This better be real.

- Now punch one.

- I punched it.

- That's good.

(phone rings)

- Yeah.

- Please hold for Rusty Pickens.

- Hello Officer Marrow.

Listen, would you releasethat little pipsqueak.

- Free?

- I said release him, yes,and send him this way.

- Alright.

Whatever you say, boss.

- Well partner, looks likethis is your lucky day.

- These are hard to open with these nails

and I'm not sure purple's the right color.

- No?

- Because now in hindsight,lime green purple,

I think it might havesent the wrong signal.

Hey Frankie!

- Hey Frankie!

- There he is!

- [Jamal] Frankie baby!

- Sam?

Jamal?

You would not believewhere I've just been.

- Man, we know man.

We made the call to get you out.

- Why you guys wearing dresses?

Why is he tied to a chair?

Why do I all of a sudden feelincredibly uncomfortable?

- All very solid questions

that I can't answer right now.

Frankie, we're on a tight schedule.

We are men on a mission.

We spent our entire lives on the take.

Right now we gotta dosomething for somebody else.

- Sam, we've been overthis 100 times, man!

How are we gonna do thatwhen the church's money's

probably still locked up in the bank?

- I have no idea what youtwo birds are going on about

but we do know Hugo whoworks over at the bank.

- Good thinkin', Frankie.

- And the bank opens in a few hours.

Gentlemen,

- Right.

- It's illogical,

it's unscientific, but it might just be

the miracle we need.

- There he is!

He's right there.

- Mr. Hugo, we were wondering if we

could take a moment of your time.

- Take my time?

- You got to help, you got to help

'cause they'll tear downthe cathedral, the church,

and they wanna put a mall there.

Stores...

- What are you talking about, you nitwit?

- Listen, what Frankie meansis that Rusty and Beverly

have been stealing fromthe church for years

and we're pretty sure themoney's right here in this bank.

- We gotta get the moneyoutta here before they do!

Can you help us?

- Can I help?

What do you think I do?

Stand here all day and hopethat my Depends hold out?

Follow me.

You say old Beverly's been stealing money

and stashing it away, hey?

- [All] Mmm hmm.

- [Hugo] There she is alright.

- I knew it.

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Steve Gray

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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