A-Haunting We Will Go Page #5

Synopsis: Stan and Ollie get involved with con men, crooks, a genial magician, and two interchangeable coffins with disastrous but funny results.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Alfred L. Werker
Production: 20th Century Fox Film Corporation
 
IMDB:
6.4
Year:
1942
68 min
416 Views


Hey, Ollie.|Look.

Keep playing, Ollie.

Ollie, play.

What are you laughing at?

Don't stop, Ollie.|Keep playing. Aah!

Aah!

Good work, fellas.|You're terrific.

Whew!

- What about me?|- Close the door.

- Hurry up, the sword cabinet goes next.|MAC: Coming right up.

What's the matter with this thing?

We better oil up those slits|after the show.

Please, mister, you can't do that.

You trying to tell me|how to do this?

- Yes, sir. You see, Ollie and l...|- Oh, scram, scram.

Oh, poor Ollie.

Poor Ollie.

Come on, out of the way,|out of the way.

Oh, poor Ollie.

Oh, please.

Please stop, mister.

Okay, Mac, let's go.

I'll bet he looks like a hamburger.

Ladies and gentlemen,|this is my mysterious saber cabinet.

I shall remove the sabers and place|the beautiful Margo in the cabinet...

...then plunge the cold steel|of these 24 blades through her body.

Never a dull moment.

- I just found out where Darby is.|- Where?

- Hanging on the ceiling.|- Cut the kidding, Joe.

Come on.

What are we going to do?

When that magician does the trick|and uncovers Darby, we're cooked.

I don't know about you guys,|but I'm lamming it.

How we gonna get past the cop|at the door?

Here come the stupes.|They'll know another way out.

Now don't be too hasty,|gentlemen.

- We couldn't find your friend.|- Take it easy. We're not gonna hurt you.

He's probably left by now|anyhow.

- We never told a soul, did we, Ollie?|- Good.

- We'd like to get out.|- Why don't you go out the stage door?

- Because we're not going...|- Hold it, Joe.

It's a little embarrassing.

There's a student out there we owe|some dough to and we ain't got it.

We thought you boys might be able|to show us another way out.

There's a window on the third floor.|You can make the sidewalk in one jump.

- Can't you, Ollie? You just...|- One jump.

There's an exit door way in the back.

- How do we get to it?|- I think you can reach it through here.

That's swell. Thanks.

Help. Help.

Help. Help. Help!

If the man you owe the money to|shows up, I'll tell him you left town.

Now, remember,|keep your trap shut about this.

Shh.

Well, it's been swell knowing you.

- Same to you.|- Hope to meet you sometime.

Those college boys|are sure funny fellas.

Say, we'd better get back.|Maybe we're holding the show up.

Coming through, please.

You ought to watch this next number|from out front. It's a great trick.

Yeah? Think I will.

You can get to the lower box|through that door.

Thanks.

Tommy, who was that man|you were talking to?

He's been hanging|around here all day.

Well, he's a fellow I met|when I was here last time.

- Tommy, what's the matter?|- Nothing. Nothing.

Now, you better make your change.|You're gonna be late. Hurry.

Okay.

Excuse me.

My next illusion, ladies and gentlemen,|is the famous Egyptian Invisible Transfer.

I call your attention to the coffin|suspended from the ceiling of the theater.

In this demonstration,|I shall endeavor to pass my subject...

...through atomic space into the coffin|above, before your very eyes.

I'll bet that's Charlie.

Keep your seats.|Stay right where you are.

And don't move a thing on that stage.

Right through the heart.

- This man's been murdered.|- What?

No one leave the theater.|Ushers, guard the doors.

Don't let anybody out.|Drop the curtain.

Where you going? You can't come in.|Something's happened.

I'm an attorney.|According to the law...

...I have the right to enter|in the interest of a client.

- Do you know who he is?|- Yeah, I know who.

Phone headquarters. Tell them to send|some men here right away.

So you're only gonna stay|in Dayton a week, huh?

I don't suppose you remember|your old pal, do you?

But Tommy had nothing to do with it.

He's been right here in the theater,|working.

You can't think Tommy|would do that.

I know how you feel, but Mr. White here|hasn't told you things he should have.

Oh, he's right, Margo, I should have|told you a long time ago.

This is Doc Lake.|He used to run a sanitarium.

I worked as his assistant|while going through medical school.

I didn't know we were mixed up|with a gang until they arrested us.

I found out we were treating gunshot|wounds without making a report.

Just a victim of circumstances,|as usual.

Officer, that man was killed|before he was put in the coffin.

- Who says so?|- You said he was shot through the heart.

That bullet entered|the top of the coffin.

I'm doing the masterminding|in this show, Mr. Dante.

And hand over that gun|you fired at the coffin.

- I am holding you too.|- Ridiculous.

Stanley, there's been a...

Stanley.

Oh, Stanley.

Stanley.

Oh, Stanley.

Well, what happened, sir?

- Somebody slugged me.|- Oh, well that's too bad.

We'd better tell Mr. Dante about it.

Mr. Dante. Mr. Dante, somebody|slugged this gentleman back there.

What do you know about the killing?

Nothing. I was in the audience.|I'm an attorney at law.

My name is Malcolm Kilgore. I'm|looking for a client, Egbert Norton.

I bet those college boys did it.|They're always playing practical jokes.

- College boys?|- The ones looking for the coffin.

- Three of them.|- Where did they go?

I'm asking the questions. What have|college boys got to do with this?

I don't know. They had guns. They went|out the exit through the Hawaiian tepee.

- Wait. You mean the South Sea hut?|- Yeah.

We better hurry if you wanna|question them. It's gonna be too late.

Right through here.

- Don't go in there.|- Oh, no?

Oh!

- Help! Help!|- Somebody get us out of here!

There's a lion!

Come on, this way.

- Where's the lieutenant?|- In the basement. I'll show you.

Andy, cover that door.

- Hey, break in the door!|- Get the door open!

- Come on.|- Get it open! Quick, will you!

- Come on. Come on!|- Wait a minute. Oh, no you don't.

- Anything wrong, lieutenant?|- No.

Put the cuffs|on these yeggs.

- Pete, get that guy in the cage.|- All right, you.

Looks like you got your men, lieutenant.|And thanks for getting my man for me.

- Your man? That's Darby Mason.|- Right.

- So he's your client.|- Tell him, Darby.

This guy is Steve Barnes,|a federal dick.

- Why didn't you let a guy in on it?|- Sorry.

I had to produce an imaginary|inheritance to smoke this guy out.

- It was all a phony?|- That's right.

I did it all with mirrors.|My apologies, Mr. Dante.

And what happened to old Uncle Jasper?|Did he really kick off?

No, that was a phony too.|He's in Alcatraz.

Good. I always liked|the old stinker.

He'll be glad to see you too.

- Why did you kill Doc Lake?|- Because he tried to double-cross me.

When they dumped me here|I got out.

When I heard somebody coming|I ducked.

Doc Lake comes sneaking along.

He pulls out his cannon, and thinking|I'm still in the coffin, pumps a slug in it.

Then he starts to scram|and I let him have it.

I stuck him in the coffin to show him|he can't make a monkey out of me.

I'm sorry I mussed up your show, pal.|It was...

...pretty good.|- Thanks.

Well, we'd better get going, Darby.|You've got a long ways to travel.

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Lou Breslow

Louis Breslow (born Lewis Breslow; July 18, 1900 – November 10, 1987) was an American screenwriter and film director. He wrote for 70 films between 1928 and 1955. He also directed seven films between 1932 and 1951 and wrote scripts for both Laurel and Hardy in their first two films at 20th Century Fox, and Abbott and Costello. Lou Breslow married film actress and comedian Marion Byron in 1932, and remained married until her death in 1985. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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