A Bad Moms Christmas Page #3

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And Christmas is the best time of year

to be single

When I see the pairs

her in the mall -

- holding hands

- Has matching scarves

and feed each other with sandwiches -

- and looking at jewelry ...

Stop. You just sound so lonely.

The wild life does not fit everyone.

I am the epitome of the wild life.

I woke up in a park this morning.

Carla, I found root fruit chips

in your kitchen.

It's for the knight.

They are wildly healthy.

They are good for the heart.

- You love much of his son, what?

Of course. Most people

love their children, mom.

Maybe. I can not keep up with it

in the latest parent trends.

How are you feeling?

I've actually had a better time.

There is something exciting,

as i need money for ...

Then it came.

You do it every time.

You show up asking for money

and play it all up.

You travel again and come back,

and stupid me give you more.

It is a completely legal

business opportunity.

How much do you need?

- Little. 5000th

Between 5000 and 10,000. Not more than 15,000.

- I'm considering it.

What a lot of beautiful cases,

You have here. Stylish place.

I should have taken my bag.

Why should we see

the Russian Nutcracker?

Because it's original.

Not the Disney version

with dance and joy.

Does it really last for five hours?

- Yes, and you will love it.

Just listen to the beautiful music.

This song is called

'When Boris is killed'.

It sounds like they are shouting at us.

- Can not we do any fun?

The theater is on the right.

- We're not going to the theater.

Where are we going?

- Wait and see.

Welcome to Sky Zone. Three kids?

- Yes!

No, we all have to join.

No, we will not. Here smells of diapers.

Then you came, Amy.

Where am I glad you are here?

My mother kills me,

but it is worth it all.

Hi, I'm Carla's mother.

- Isis! Nice to meet you.

Hello. You must be Amy's mother. Carla.

Jaxon, mother needs more splashes.

My son, Jaxon.

- It's my mother, Isis.

Ruth, as in Ruth Bader Ginsberg.

Isis, as in the terrorist organization.

It's my mother, Sandy.

- I've heard so much about you, Amy.

You really have the same haircut.

Hi, my name is Ruth. Amy's mother.

- Jessie. We followed the car.

Who does any Christmas present?

Hi, Ruth.

I took a churro with you.

Here's fun. Such places

I did not come as a child.

No, God free me.

- We broke things in the air in the quarry.

How nice. Where are you from?

I am from Ottawa, Canada.

My husband wanted more time in it,

so we moved to Bismarck, North Dakota.

I was only 18 when I got Kiki.

And then Dirk died.

A long and painful death.

But a beautiful day we die all.

Lonely and scared.

Where are you from, Ruth?

- Chicago.

The city of light. Bismarck was called

"the old white city".

You are weird.

Did you have a good upbringing in Chicago?

- No. My mother was awful.

She even hit me because I

was wearing a peep toe-shoe on a boat.

It was that time.

- Two months ago.

Amy thinks I'm strict, but she

I do not know what I had to go through.

Like the age of 15, I got holes in my ears,

and she called me a luder.

She sent me to a boarding school in Croatia.

She is tough.

Where are you from, Isis?

- I did not know my parents.

I used just all my talents.

- It sounds abominable.

I was roadie for REO Speedwagon

for 15 years.

Cigarettes are forbidden, Isis.

- It's not a cigarette. Here you go.

Here you go. You must do that yourself.

Where do you go to church Christmas Eve?

'Church of eternal mother'.

The city's best worship service.

Nice, we'll see you there.

How nice to meet new friends.

Do you want to play the chief ball?

- It does not make grandmothers.

What the hell did she say?

- That mother-in-law does not ...

Yes. But we do.

- I am in.

It was a pure parody.

Was it fun? Would you like to laugh

If I changed your heart pills?

Amy will obviously ruin Christmas.

I have to make myself more worried.

- Or you can stop the war.

Do you think I enjoy it?

I do not.

I just want to give my grandchildren

The wonderful Christmas they deserve.

Your first Christmas without their father

Must be perfect, so they know everything is alright.

But a half-hearted Christmas will destroy them.

They smoke into a vicious spiral

of anxiety, depression and drugs.

They really looked forward to it.

- They had enjoyed the Nutcracker more.

My Christmas is enchanting and magical.

Amy's Christmas is lazy and petty.

My way is better,

and my way always wins.

When it's all about the kids.

As Amy's mother, I'm forced

to push her to be a good mother.

One beautiful day she will thank me

in a touching voice in front of a large audience.

Have you finished my pajamas?

- Yes, Ruth. It is still hot.

I'm sorry to get you on.

Thanks.

You curl my pajamas.

- I make your toothbrush ready.

TWO DAYS FOR YEAR

Oh god, no more fisser.

Yes!

Hello. Are you Carla?

You bet. Who are you?

- Ty Swindel. Intimate Waxing.

It sounds good.

Hop on to the bunk, Ty Swindel.

Thanks.

Have you grown the clumps before?

- Yes, I'm stripping.

Then the undercarriage

should always be welcoming.

I just remove the towel,

so I can lubricate the grown up ...

For satan too, where is it big.

It looks like a traffic rule!

Pardon.

People are always a little scared.

Not at all.

I just have to spend a lot more wax.

A moment.

Wow.

Where do you usually grow?

- In Cleveland. That's where I'm from.

It is a lie. I'm from Edgewater.

- I'm from Tremont!

What a little world. Where sour.

- Yes, sir.

Wow.

Can you just lift your penis?

Well. What are you doing in Chicago, Ty?

- Sexy Santa Claus competitions.

Lovely. This hurts a bit.

How did you dance?

I'm a firefighter.

- Of course.

I once came out

to a fire in a strip club.

The owner came and said:

"You there. You have a giant cock."

And I have that.

The rest of the story we know.

Such a nice story.

- Thanks.

This is scary.

Christmas stands for the door.

Do you have plans with your boyfriend?

I wish I had a boyfriend.

Women see me like a sex object

and goes when we have had sex.

But even though I dance in a g-string,

Do I also have feelings, right?

I know it well.

Where are you easy to talk to.

I can be honest. It's great.

I feel the same way, Ty.

Swing your feet behind your head,

so I can get behind the clinker.

Let's get them away.

Carla,

it may seem a little staggering ...

... but do you want to

for the competition tonight?

I have a code about

not to go out with the customers.

Of course, and you should.

I'm joking. I have no code.

I'm growing your a**hole.

I would love to

She is fun and beautiful.

It is a rare combination.

It is here too.

So do we have a deal tonight?

- We have that.

Should I spread the balls for you?

- Thanks.

No one has offered to do before.

I spread balls for you at any time.

Who sent you, Ty Swindel?

What made you come today, Kiki?

"My mother and I are very close.

And we want to be ...

- Closer.

No.

We want to be more independent.

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