A Bag of Hammers Page #6

Here. Take it.

Careful.

Just... drink it.

Okay...

- Mm-mm.

- I don't believe you. Yeah right.

- Mm-mm.

- Come on.

- You like it a little bit.

- Mm-mm.

Kelsey! Kelsey!

Let's go!

Let's go.

What are you driving?

What?

Geez. I'm gonna get my ass

kicked if someone sees.

Just get in.

And don't say "ass".

Come on,

it's all we could find.

We gotta get you

to the doctor's by four.

Doctor's?

That's right.

You need some shots.

Yeah, so you don't

bring home diseases.

- Just kidding!

- We're going to Splash World!

We faked you out so hard!

Look at your face.

- That was awesome!

- Yes!

You smell like throw-up.

My shoe smells like

throw-up.

- Hello.

- Hey, how's it going, Kelsey?

Good. We went to

Splash Mountain.

- We had a very educational field trip today.

- Yep.

- Oh, you did?

- Yep.

And we learned that Splash

Mountain makes Alan puke!

- Kelsey, thank you...

- Yes we did, it's a beautiful thing.

Kelsey, you wanna go see how

Jorge makes the waffles?

- Sure.

- Hey, cool.

- Deal. Whaddya say?

- Thank you.

- Hey, boys.

- Hey, Jorge.

Hi, Jorge.

Just what in the f***

are you doing?

Mel, we're doing this.

Okay? So...

What you're doing is selfish.

This wont fix you,

wont help anything.

It wont erase anything.

You'll just f*** up

everyone involved.

Can I get a cup

of coffee, please?

- Thanks.

- If you do this...

You will hurt him so bad...

You'll make him just like you.

Alright, that's enough.

Kelsey. We're going.

Why?

Come on, guys.

- Slow pokes.

- We're coming.

You got my shirt

and everything?

Oh yeah.

The shirt is cool.

Kelsey, get in the car.

What? Why?

- Hey wait, you can't take him!

- What are you doing, man!

Watch me.

- Kelsey!

- What are you doing?!

Hey! You've got no right!

Right? Kidnapping a little boy?

Is that a right?

- No, we're not he...

- Back off!

He has no one.

He has no extended family,

no father.

We're all he's got!

A mother dies,

and you thought

you could just take him?

That no one would notice?

That no one would care?

- No. All we've done is take care of Kelsey.

- Save it.

- I'm taking him to the police.

- Don't do that man.

- Hold on!

- Please, don't take him!

They got me a sofa bed.

We went and tested them out.

I got to pick which one.

And they didn't even care.

- And Alan says soon we're gonna

move into the front house... - Kelsey.

so I can have my own room.

Look, that's all fine

but it's not...

- It's not a mother...

- She hated me!

I'm sure that isn't true.

Listen, you guys had

a very difficult time

with the hurricane.

- When an act of God like that happens...

- I'm not from there.

What?

She made me say that we

were from New Orleans,

so people would treat us nicer.

Look, you may not

understand this,

but this is the best

thing for you, okay.

They wanted me.

They couldn't take

care of you, Kelsey.

No one has ever

wanted me before.

But they wanted me!

- It's not enough.

- Yes, it is!

It could have been.

Get on it, Kels!

Get on it, Kels!

- Alright, come on, Kelsey.

- Get on it, Kels. Top corner!

- Top three, yes.

- Top three.

See how my sword weeps

for the poor Kings death.

- Yes.

- Excellent.

Very adult coloring here.

- Where you going?

- Just out. None of your business.

I don't know what the f***

you're talking about!

What am I talking about?

It's not my f***ing

fault, it's you.

F***!

Blue.

That's so easy,

it's right there.

You total idiot.

Sorry for your loss.

Condolences.

Head on the hood.

Spread your legs.

Do not resist me.

Do not resist me.

There he is.

Yes!

Welcome out.

Freedom!

You guys have to

stop stealing cars.

Kelsey!

- Come on.

- Yeah.

...six, seven, eight...

Welcome to Wiggles,

the Wiggles Waffles...

Can you make your hips go back?

And I'm a professional!

We just need some hotdogs.

What's up, buddy?

Yea.

Kelsey?

Kelsey?

The group home was okay?

At least the water's hot.

I'm sorry, Kelsey.

It's our job, my job actually,

to protect you,

kids like you

from people like that.

It's no excuse,

obviously, but...

Sometimes, you know...

Sometimes we just can't

get there soon enough.

Hey,

I promise I'm gonna be around

a lot more from now on.

Okay?

We're gonna find you a family

that you can stay

with for a while.

Become an adoptive

family maybe.

We'll see.

But...

Nothing bad is gonna happen

to you anymore.

Alright?

With the new people can

I have my own room?

We'll see what we can do.

You wanna go meet them?

There's a busy infidel

She crept about the palace

And we had poor defense

And she had little malice

A gentle touch put here

A saddened hurt embrace

I wouldn't kiss enough

To put them in their place

So where my father went

Is not now common knowledge...

Alright.

Here we go.

- You got your toothbrush?

- Yeah dad, I've got it.

You got the map of the school,

so you don't get lost.

You guys need to chill out.

Be cool.

- I will be fine.

- It is cool.

And, I just want you to know,

we're gonna be

around if you need...

It's only an hour drive.

I promise to visit.

- Right.

- Cool.

- He promises to come visit.

- Good. Good.

Son, I'm so proud of you.

Thank you.

Alright, you guys

need to get out of here.

Alright. Don't forget

your six string now.

Express yourself, bud.

I'm Kelsey Manilow-Dwellman.

I think I'm in room 322-B.

It's alright.

- Let's go.

- I'm not ready yet.

Alright, you guys

need to get out of here cuz...

Okay.

See you in four years.

- I love you, son.

- See you, bud.

Okay.

Wow, we did it!

All the fruit turned red

Some of them still green

But never will you see one

that's stuck and in between

As all came from a garden

where the wind has died down low

And there my father went

to help the green fruit grow

He tends them with a smile

His fingers stroke the leaves

He'll never leave the garden

It's all that I believe

Hey, Marty.

This is it...

What can I get ya?

A side of you.

I knew you'd be happy.

- Seriously?

- Yeah.

Oh Marty, no. No...

But I can give you, you know...

A lots...

I am... sure.

You're a great guy,

- and I think you're...

- You touched me...

It's not gonna happen again,

and there is someone out there

who will want to touch you

- but I don't.

- You only know seventy percent of me...

- Try for his wallet, Kelsey.

- Kelsey!

What are you doing?!

- I am so sorry...

- Apologize to this man.

I can't believe this.

I am so sorry.

No matter what we try

he just keeps on stealing!

You are gonna be

punished, mister!

Hundreds of kittens and puppies

being put down every week.

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