A Case of You Page #8

You're full of surprises.

My parents are coming.

Whoa.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

They're really nice.

They're really mellow, so

it's no pressure at all.

Okay.

[UPBEAT TANGO MUSIC]

Do you, um... Do you want to

come upstairs for a nightcap?

A nightcap?

What year is this?

Shut up.

I assumed that you knew

that "nightcap" is a

euphemism for sexy time.

Ah, no. No.

I never heard that.

I'd love to come up

and nightcap you,

but I don't think the Indian

food and the dance moves

are really joining

in perfect harmony.

I'm so sorry.

It's okay.

Oh.

Well, s... yeah.

Just get some rest and call

me if you need anything.

I will. I will.

You don't look good.

I'll be okay.

Well, tonight was really nice.

Yeah.

"I have learned that to be

with those I like is enough. "

[CHUCKLES]

It's... it's Walt Whitman.

Yeah, I know.

What?

Nothing.

[CHUCKLES]

No, what?

Uh...

I think, um...

I think I'm falling in love with you.

Birdie, you're... you're amazing.

Good night.

Good night.

Holy sh*t.

She said she loved me.

Can you believe that?

How could she possibly

say that and mean it?

She loves me?

And she wants me to meet

her parents on Friday.

El, she doesn't even

know me, this girl.

Oh, man.

I am... I am eating ice cream

in the middle of winter.

I'm quoting Whitman randomly.

If she thinks this is who I am,

she's in for a rude awakening.

That's all I can say.

I, uh... I got to write a little bit,

but if you need me,

I'll be in my room.

Oh, how am I doing?

Oh, thanks so much for asking.

[UP-TEMPO PERCUSSIVE MUSIC]

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

Oh.

Hello?

Morning, sunshine.

Alan, hey.

What time is it?

Listen, it's early,

but I couldn't wait.

I got those pages you

emailed me last night.

Oh. yeah?

You like?

I likey very much.

I likey long time.

That's why I'm calling.

I'm calling to see if we

can get a pitch session

set together to come up

with the ending

and go over some ideas for it.

Let's say next Friday at 6:00.

Oh, uh, actually, you know, I...

I got this dance recital thing.

[LAUGHS]

That's a good one.

But seriously, how's Friday

gonna be, next Friday?

Uh, yeah, sure.

That'll work.

All right, it's on.

I'm excited.

That's great.

So what are you doing tonight?

I'd like to get my guy a beer.

You know, Alan, I can't.

My...

This girl I've been seeing,

she's got this surprise

planned for us.

All right.

Listen, I got to go.

I got to get back to writing.

But I'll see you next Friday.

Okay. I'm psyched up.

I love you, pal.

I love you too.

Triple Xs, triple Os.

You too.

[SIGHS]

[GRUNTS]

[CHUCKLES]

I'm so excited.

Me too.

All right.

I'm nervous.

Now, you have to close

your eyes

till I tell you to open them.

Really?

Yeah.

Okay.

I might need some help.

Yeah. I'll lead you.

Okay. Sorry.

All righty.

Here we go.

Walk straight.

Okay.

'Kay.

All right. Open 'em.

'Kay.

Wow.

Isn't this awesome?

Ha!

My friend works here.

Had to promise my first... born

child to get the keys,

but what do you think?

Those are Andrew Wyeths.

I know.

He's my favorite artist.

Yeah, I know.

Really?

Yeah.

You know who mine is?

No.

I don't have one.

[CHUCKLES]

Uh... Do you want some bourbon?

No, I'm good.

Really? Just a toast?

To what?

I don't know.

To us.

Do you have anything

besides bourbon?

No, no.

This is all I have.

Ah.

Yeah, no.

I'm good.

That's crazy.

My mom used to wear her hair

in braids just like this.

They call these the, uh...

the Helga paintings.

Andrew's wife walked

into his studio one day

and found, like, 240 paintings

of this other woman.

Turns out it was their

next-door neighbor Helga.

Well, life's a b*tch.

[SIGHS]

God, I wish I could paint like that.

I bet you could.

You're so talented.

[LAUGHING]

Oh, okay.

Are you, uh... are you hungry?

You want some food?

I just ate.

It's okay.

Sam, what's going on?

What do you mean?

Do you want to be

here right now?

What are you talking about?

Okay, I'm...

I'm just starting to feel

like some annoying

girl you just met

that you're trying to get rid of.

I-I-I have a lot of sh*t

on my mind, is all.

But I'm making a lot of headway

with my writing.

Really good stuff.

That Teen Vampire 2?

[CHUCKLES]

[CHUCKLES]

Is that what you think?

You think... you think

I'm a hack writer, don't you?

No.

No, no. God.

No, that's not what I meant.

It's all right.

I get it.

You know, I... I kind of

prefer this to the Wyeths.

Is this because

I-I told you that I...

you know, about what I

said the other night?

Come on.

I see what's going on here.

It's a little weird, don't you think?

I mean, you invite me

to this private viewing

of your favorite artist's paintings

with your favorite liquor

and your favorite bread

and your favorite cheese.

If you're not into it,

we don't have to...

No, no, no.

I get it, okay?

I'm... I'm meat loaf, and you

want f***ing filet mignon.

What are you even

talking about?

I'm exhausted!

The rock climbing, the guitar,

and the cooking...

The cooking?

I'm just trying to keep up

with you, Birdie,

and it's not easy.

Okay, no.

I don't want you

to keep up with me, okay?

That... none of that stuffs

important to me.

Can I tell you something?

Honestly, I think you're better

off with someone else.

Like Tony...

outgoing, talented, worldly.

He's... he's perfect for you.

What? No.

Tony is my friend, okay?

Dating the guy was

a complete nightmare.

You're being ridiculous.

Am I really?

Who's my favorite author?

I don't... I don't know.

Carlos Castaneda?

No.

What's my favorite dessert?

[SCOFFS]

I don't know.

Why don't you tell me?

See, don't you think it's strange

that y... y... you don't

know those things?

Uh, no.

Honestly, no.

There's a lot of stuff

you don't know about me, either.

But what's the point?

We are so different.

There... there's too much...

I've barely traveled,

and you're like

a f***ing Peace Corps veteran.

I don't even know...

What do you see in me, huh?

And what's to say you won't

just take off and leave

whenever you want?

That is kind of

your philosophy, right?

When life gives you

something better,

you just... you take off.

Right?

That's what you think?

You think

I'm just waiting around

till something better

comes along?

Well, I don't know.

You tell me.

That was the first time

I've ever told a guy

that I love him.

Do you know how shitty

it was for me

to get that response from you?

So why are you here?

Because, idiot...

I like you, whether you

choose to believe it or not.

So if you don't think that I

know you because I don't know

what your f***ing favorite

dessert is, then please tell me

so I can stop imagining

that this might

actually go somewhere.

One more drink

'fore I split town

Pulled up in a rose-pink Cadillac

He was singing with the top

down Girl from the North

Dylan and Johnny Cash

He won the car in a card game

Listened to the boss

And keeps his clothes

in a gunnysack

She said,

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