A Spell on You Page #5

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into effect there, I think.

But we don't know, who knows?

It could be this guy or

it could be this guy.

But I recon it was this one.

[OLLY] Yeah, I see.

Absolute bloody carnage is what it is.

[BECKY] Yeah, it's pretty cool though.

It's like the 1066

equivalent of a computer game.

Better than a computer game, you recon?

Yeah.

Yeah.

You just have to add

your own sound effects

and stuff, that's all.

Go ching, ching.

Words to that effect.

Mm hmm.

Ah, Woodley.

So good, they named it once.

[BECKY] Have you been here before?

I have, I have, I have.

I know Woodley, actually.

I grew up in a state very

similar to this, actually.

[BECKY] It's not much,

but we like it, most of it.

Yeah, it is what it is.

Nothing to be ashamed of.

In fact, my first

girlfriend was from Woodley.

I was 12, and she tasted of lollipops.

Five Oak, how's that?

Thank you, perfect.

Come on, Olly.

[OLLY] Thanks Steve.

My pleasure, sir.

[OLLY] You have a cool car.

Well, thank you.

It's not actually my

car, it's the company's

but I'll take the compliment.

Olly, let me give you the

keys to go and open the house.

Can't I stay with you?

No, no, just and go

and get some biscuits.

[STEVE] He's a good kid.

Yeah, yeah he is.

I, I should get going.

Actually, I've got some

friends coming over.

I'm doing a bit of cooking for them,

and as rock and roll as it sounds,

I need to soak some beans.

Okay.

Maybe we should do something

next weekend, if you're free.

Yeah, that would be really nice.

I mean, I could cook

for you, if you want.

How about that?

I'm quite a good cook, if I say so myself.

Proof's the pudding, so.

I've seen your place, maybe

you can come around to mine.

How about that?

Cool.

(SOFT ROMANTIC MUSIC)

Was it too much?

Mm mm.

I'm gonna just...

You, yeah.

(SOBBING)

Vicki, what's wrong?

[VICKI] He bought a watch.

What, a watch?

We went away for the weekend

and he didn't say

anything on the Saturday.

Then it was Sunday, and

we're going out for dinner,

and he comes out and,

and he shows me this watch.

He was never going to propose.

Oh Vicki, I'm so sorry.

(CRYING)

Okay.

Good morning, Digital Marketing.

I don't know.

Can you just hold on a minute, please?

I'm so sorry about that.

Comme ca, madam?

What's that?

Don't worry, it's got chocolate in it.

Guys.

Oh, thank you, Stevie.

Ah, Scotty, almost didn't recognize

you with your clothes on.

Mr. Kahn's renewed the contract.

Good work.

Thanks, Steve.

(SOFT MUSIC)

Yeah, yeah, we need to use the archers

in a minute as well.

Okay.

Are you all right, Olly?

Yeah.

You're from next door, right?

Yeah.

[BECKY] Hi, I'm Becky.

Hi.

What are you playing?

Battle of Hastings, it's really cool.

Ah okay.

Well, I'll leave you boys to it.

If you need anything,

give me a shout, yeah?

[BOTH] Okay.

(GUITAR MUSIC)

[BECKY] At the harvest, keep back

some of the best of your crop.

The food grown with love

and served to the one

that you love will surely beget love.

Meet me in the morning when you rise

We'll walk through the

orchard in the sunshine

If you hold my hand,

it will be all right

And we'll stay outside

until the moonlight

We ain't got no plans

Don't have no foresight

In a semicircle

To watch the sunrise

You look oh so pretty

And the weather's fine

Wow, you look amazing.

Oh thank you.

Welcome.

Can I take your wicker basket thing?

Yeah, I brought some

stuff from my allotment.

[STEVE] Okay, fantastic.

Well come in, come in.

Thank you.

[STEVE] You found the place all right?

Yeah, fine, this is lovely.

Now, do you like your wine sweet or dry?

[BECKY] Sweet.

Okay, imagine you said dry

because that's what we've got.

[BECKY] Okay.

Prepare to be converted.

Okay.

Thank you.

Have a smell of it

first, before you try it.

Just put your nose in.

All the way, go on.

Don't be shy.

Don't snort it, but just

(SNIFFING)

you know, get the aromas.

- Mm.

- Nice?

[STEVE] Are your taste buds going?

Mm-hmm, can I try it now?

[STEVE] You can, you

can definitely try it.

Okay.

[STEVE] Smell it first.

I have, I've smelt it.

And then the taste.

- Great.

- Good.

Mm.

Kaboom, brilliant, hand it back.

[BECKY] Okay.

I'll fill it up.

You don't have to smell

it again this time.

No, thanks very much.

Ah, magnifique!

So you grew these beans yourself.

Mm hmm.

That's amazing.

They are delicious.

Oh, good, yeah, my granddad,

he gave me his allotment,

which I kind of look after and stuff, see.

Well, I think they're possibly the best

beans I've ever had in my life.

Thank you.

How's the fish?

I don't normally eat fish very much,

apart from fish fingers, so.

Right.

(SOFT ROMANTIC MUSIC)

How's it going?

Yeah good.

What's that?

Just my little family heirloom.

I'm wondering how you might feel

about a little Moroccan dessert?

Uh, yeah, I like Moroccan food.

Steve, what this is,

oh my God!

Mmm, I literally haven't

smoked this since uni.

This is a really big bag.

Well, I don't smoke very often.

Just weekends and things like that.

Mm hmm.

[STEVE] No pressure.

No, no pressure.

Let's do this.

Let's do this shizzle.

That's what you say, isn't it?

I don't think so, not anymore, no.

You know I've got to tell you,

I was really nervous

before I came here tonight.

We sat down, and you brought

out this fish, you know?

And I...

Golden curry, yeah.

Curry, I just, I was just,

I didn't like the fish so much.

You didn't?

Sorry, is that mean?

It's just so like grown up.

There's fish and this sauce,

and this rice in like a shape, and I'm 25.

I normally eat rice in a bowl, you know?

In a bowl shape, you put it in a bowl.

It was in a bowl shape, yeah.

I should've checked, I'm sorry.

[BECKY] It's all right,

next time, just no, no fish.

Next date, no fish.

[STEVE] Next date?

This is a date, right?

I thought, yeah, I

thought this was a date.

This is a date.

[STEVE] This is definitely a date.

This is such a date.

[STEVE] You've come over to my flat.

You've lighted candles, this is a date.

[STEVE] This is a date,

I mean, that's a date.

This is our third date.

Uh, what, third date?

[BECKY] This is our third date.

Where are you getting

the other two from?

Well, we went to like the museum.

That was such a date.

You're brother was there!

[BECKY] It's still date.

And a large replica of a historically

significant embroidery.

(LAUGHING)

That was...

[STEVE] Well, what

was the first date then?

If that was two, what was one?

Record shop.

Jim was there, Jim the geek.

Jim was...

[STEVE] Does Jim know it was a date?

Jim loved the date!

Jim had a great time.

[STEVE] You've spoken to

Jim about the date, have you?

I just knew I could see that

Jim was like loving the date.

Well, as long as Jim,

it was a date then.

[BECKY] It was a date.

I'm not sure.

Three dates, my friend, three dates.

Okay, what does three dates mean

to someone of your generation?

Well, it means that I can stay.

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