![Find Accidental Love on Amazon](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BMjE4MDE3Nzk1OV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMDg2ODE5MzE@._V1_SX300.jpg)
Accidental Love Page #10
You have the floor... for one minute.
- OK, OK. Are you OK?
What?
Sorry.
This bill...
is about more than... a single congressman...
or his lobbyist whores.
Because you know what?
Not everyone has really awesome healthcare,
like you guys do, here in Washington.
And all it takes is a gondola...
And... if you're uninsured
or if you're even crappily insured...
you're screwed
like me.
Or like him. Or like him. And is that cool?
It is not cool.
This is America, right?
And we do things right here and we help people.
And we take care of people here.
My head, it hurts.
- My face feels like it's gonna fall off.
- Alice?
I believe in...
America!
Alice!
Yeah!
- Hey, are you OK?
- I'm a little dizzy.
- OK. You were amazing.
- I was?
Well done! That was-that was just wonderful.
Madam Speaker, you must call for a vote.
Yeah!
Vote, vote, vote!
Very well, we'll vote. But remember,
federally funded care is a slippery slope
leading to higher taxes and lousy service.
Well, we just heard them. I think
they're gonna do the right thing.
This is gonna be so dramatic
here, when everyone votes.
Absolutely.
Begin the vote.
- It's all electronic now.
- What?
The vote is completed.
Healthcare loses, like always.
- I don't feel so good.
- Alice? Alice!
Alice! Alice!
Alice!
Get a picture.
- Alice, are you OK?
- I'm OK, I'm OK.
I care about everyone under this
roof no matter our differences.
- Madam Speaker...
- Look up, please.
One more.
Madam Speaker, one more, please.
Wait, wait, where are you going?
Alice, we're gonna get you a glass of water, OK?
- OK.
- Alice!
I'm-I'm OK. I'm-I'm just dizzy.
I just need some air.
- I need some... I need some air.
- I got you.
Nice and easy, guys.
Are you OK?
I'm a little lightheaded, but it's getting better.
Alice, I can't believe this happened.
Marsha.
I'm sorry, Alice. It just wasn't meant to be.
I'm just right back where I started.
Who knows when we'll get fixed now.
You are not just a leader, you're one of them.
You been lying this whole time.
That's why you won't let me near
your backside, because you got...
a pop-out baboon ass.
- Tell her.
- Yes, it's true.
But Norm and Alice said that you'd love me anyway.
All the lies are over. True love can begin.
Actually...
that's a deal breaker. I'm sorry, Keyshawn.
I can't be with you.
Between your breakup, the loss of our bill...
alone in a Godless universe.
I've been waiting for a sign there's
a God and there is no sign.
Let's just get Alice home, OK?
Hey, now that you're famous, it should
be easy to get you some medical help.
But what about Norm... and Keyshawn?
And all those people? I wanted to help them.
And where's Howard?
I don't, uh... I don't think you
need to think about that right now.
- What do you mean? Where is he?
- No surprise, there.
What?
They're lizard people, Alice. They
change their skins and eat their young.
It's time to go home and make a real life there.
- I don't know.
- It'd be fun to have a slave.
- If he's really sorry.
- Oh, he is, he is. Wait and see.
- It'll be an asset.
- OK, let's see it.
Thank you. You won't be sorry.
Order!
We have an important statement
by Congressman Birdwell.
Thank you, Madam Speaker.
First of all, I would like to clearly state
was for me to leave my party.
The same goes for sponsoring
that Catastrophic Care bill.
Thank God it didn't pass.
I was under the spell of a woman which,
as demonstrated by Madam Speaker today,
is my weakness.
I stand here humbly begging my colleagues
to forgive my temporary insanity
and let me back into their strong party.
Which is so much better than those
Independents. They're so lame.
I mean, how many... how many
of them are there? Like three?
That's not a party. Let's
get this moon base going!
Here!
How could you, Howard?
Furthermore, I would like to show my loyalty
and honor the late Speaker McCoy
by proposing that we rename
the Congressional Gym...
the "McCoy Memorial Gymnasium."
Yeah! Yes!
- Welcome back, Howard.
- Welcome back.
I just want to get out of this
town as fast as possible.
If it's any consolation, all the
women who've slept with Howard
said the sex was either average or below average.
How's it going, hon? You ready to go?
- Yeah, I'm almost packed.
- Alright, let me help you.
Look at it this way, you learned
...gymnasium bill today turned into mayhem
was snuck into the bill.
A version of the Emergency Care bill
was snuck into the Congressional
Gymnasium Renovation bill
by notorious Congressman Howard Birdwell.
- Howard?
- Now that is a sign I'm looking for.
Here to comment is pending House
Speaker, Pam Henry Hendrickson.
How could you and other voting members
not even read the bill, Congresswoman?
Of course I skim, Tom. I can't read everything.
It's a lot of paperwork.
My chief of staff, Edwin, usually
carefully reviews bills for me,
but this time, he let me take it in the neck.
So, uh... I understand the sneaky little
rider only provides for emergency healthcare
for the following accidents, a nail in the head,
- a fallen anus...
- Yeah!
...prolonged priapism, an ax in the femur,
a face burn from a s'mores while camping.
Everyone else, you're on your own, as usual.
Is this a meaningless victory?
This small, but extremely
dangerous, bill has opened a door
socialist medical spending.
- Let's not forget child lesbianism.
- Ooh, you witch.
And we did pass the moon base bill.
And that's what counts.
Thank you, Madam Speaker.
Now Birdwell's sneakiness has earned
him the dreaded triple censure.
He's now expected to officially resign
from Congress before he's kicked out.
- Oh, that's too bad.
- Mr. Birdwell joins us live, via satellite.
Sounds like you're in very hot
water with your leadership.
They got their moon base, Tom, but
they'd pretty much like to kill me
and throw my body into a wheat thresher,
which they pretty much already
done with this triple censure.
- Was the sneaky risk worth it?
- Yes! To help all the people.
Alice's friends, really, but especially Alice.
Alright, we don't need to watch that.
- Move, move, move.
- This is so boring.
...really frustrating
would know that I had to seem like I
was betraying her to get this done.
I thought he was a traitor, but he's not.
He's not anymore. He's not a traitor.
All for her and her dream, which I totally share.
She inspires me in all departments,
from making laws, to making love,
which is private, and now it's
on TV, so it's not private.
I just had to say this because I know if she
heard me that she would stop hating me.
So...
Alice, I-I don't even know if you're watching this.
- I am. I am.
- But everything I did, I did for you.
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"Accidental Love" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/accidental_love_2180>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In