Accidents Happen Page #5

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Look, going to the Police

isn't gonna help.

You smell

like perfume.

And pot.

I've been

with Katrina.

What do you mean?

We smoked pot,

and we made out.

Can you really

smell it on me?

Hey, Doug.

What if they think

we did it on purpose?

Look, Im sorry

you lost your father,

but this could turn

into a great big sh*t

shower with, like, no soap.

Gene would come with me.

He wouldn't wimp.

Yeah. Sh*t

certainly does happen.

Doug, wait. Wait.

Just give me a

couple of days, okay?

Just a couple.

I have to tell

my mom first.

You have until Monday.

Any calls?

No.

Hey, don't worry.

He'll call.

Yeah. And the Pope

has a key to the

Playboy mansion.

What are you making?

I made dinner.

Could you be a

little more specific?

I can't even

be approximate.

Im so hungry I could

eat a crowbar and

sh*t a jungle gym.

Good. All those loose

screws you have will

finally come in handy.

That's good.

You know, I--

I've been thinking

about the accident.

Are you missing

your sister?

No. I mean,

I miss Gene.

I didn't ask you

if you missed Gene.

You don't think

I miss Gene?

I asked you if

you missed your sister.

I don't really

remember her.

How can you say that?

I don't.

I remember her

playing music, but--

You'd better think

good and hard

because you can do

a hell of a lot better

than her playing music.

I meant

Mr. Post's accident.

I was talking

about that one.

There's something--

You get it.

If it's Bob, tell him

Im-Im cooking, uh,

cooking dinner.

Go on!

Im busy

for a minute.

Hello?

Hey, Billy. Dad here.

Connie thinks you're great.

Is it him?

It was a nice

day, wasn't it?

Ah, yeah.

Well, the good news is,

Who is it?

Connie and I are

getting married.

On Sunday.

We'd really love it

if you could be there.

Yeah, okay.

Great. Great.

I'll pick you up

around 10:
00, okay?

Uh, yeah. Okay.

Bye!

Okay.

Sorry I can't

help you out.

Our television's a

piece of crap. Goodbye.

Somebody doing

a survey.

All that's left

to do is sign the

registry book.

Congratulations,

Mr. and Mrs.--

Conway-Kellywood.

So, this mysterious

bowling ball.

Now, you say you

stole it from a car.

Which car?

It was a black

ball--car.

I think the

car was black.

It was a black car?

Black or blue.

It was a dark color.

Where was it?

Where was it?

Im talking to you.

I think it was on the

other side of the hill.

Okay, I don't get it.

What's this all about?

What makes two kids

who have never been

in trouble before,

suddenly start taking their

clothes off and breaking into

cars and stealing things?

You do realize

you're up against

manslaughter here?

Involuntary--

Zip it.

It was an accident. We didn't

mean to do it. I tried to tell

you guys afterwards but,

I got the hiccups.

Really? You wouldn't believe

how many good confessions are

just ruined by the hiccups.

So,

you returned

to the scene of

the crime, to confess.

We had to get

the bowling ball.

But it wasn't there.

So, what happened

to it, Billy?

It disappeared.

Look, I admit,

I wished my father

was dead sometimes.

But we didn't mean

to kill him, all right?

He was fat.

He was supposed

to die of a heart attack.

Same old Billy,

sneaking around.

At least you've got

your clothes on.

What are you doing here?

Aren't you gonna

welcome me home?

What do you mean home?

Connie's a cow.

Sh*t, Larry, does

ma know you're here?

What do you think?

You didn't tell her

about Connie the Cow.

You're the bad son.

Good luck.

Ma?

You okay?

Im sorry.

Im really sorry.

It's just you

had that date

with Bob, and--

Bob's an idiot.

Yeah, but so is dad.

And so the Christ are you.

I thought I

could trust you.

Oh, what the hell

else aren't you

telling me?

I was trying

to protect you.

I don't need

protecting, Billy.

I need someone

who's on my side.

I was just worried

you might take it bad.

What in the hell

is wrong with you?

Of course I was

gonna take it bad.

Your father tried

to kill himself.

What?

Yeah. After the accident.

How do you think he broke

both damn ankles? It wasn't

doing the ha-cha-cha!

The goddamn

branch broke!

Im the strong

one, Billy. I am.

I've had my share

of problems, but they

should have been our problems,

your father's and mine.

Connie?

Connie Goddamn Conway.

It's Conway-Kellywood.

And she's pregnant.

Liquor Larry in there

already told me, so

save your breath.

Mr. Post's accident

wasn't really an accident.

Not like everyone thinks.

What?

Doug and I stole

a bowling ball out

of someone's car.

And I bowled it.

It was just

meant to be fun,

but it went down

the hill and,

Mr. Post swerved

to avoid it, and--

Oh, my God!

Oh, God.

Douglas Goddamn Post.

Connie Goddamn Conway

Kennel Compound.

And Billy.

Kick me in the teeth and thanks

for goddamn nothing little

Mr. Sh*t For Brains.

Anything else you've

been keeping from me?

We were at the Police

station. We told them

everything.

Great. Perfect. And?

They didn't find the bowling

ball. But they're gonna

investigate further.

They thought it was suicide

and the Post's insurance

doesn't pay for that.

So Douglas Goddamn Post

thought maybe we

should confess,

and maybe it would help.

And what part did

a guilty conscience

play in that?

I thought about it.

I thought about it a lot.

Oh, my God.

You know what's

wrong with you, Billy?

Goddamn brain needs

some more goddamn

brains in it?

You're selfish.

You only think

of yourself.

You're just

like your father,

and I've had it up

to my finish line with

the whole bunch of you!

And to think I had

some hope for you.

I thought you might

amount to something.

I guess I should

have been more specific!

I have this dream.

I n it you're eight,

and Im six again.

And you hold my hand

and walk with me

to school.

That's it.

That's the dream.

They don't lock anybody's

cat in anybody's car,

or the Holoway's dog.

You just hold

my hand and walk

with me to school.

It's a nice day.

Wake up, Gene.

Please, wake up.

How can you

just sit there?

Going up going up

Going up up up

Going up going up

Going up up up

Going up going up

Going up up up

Going up going up

Oh

Like a bubble

Headin' for trouble

Wind is blowin'

In the wrong direction

Ma?

Mm?

I got you something.

I thought maybe

you could keep some

of Linda's things in it.

One time she dressed

me up like a girl.

Yeah, I was

kind of cute.

And we danced sometimes.

We haven't been to

the cemetery in a while.

This was her

favorite song.

Oh, yeah.

I always

hated this song.

Gene's getting

worse, Ma.

Gene, Mom's here.

Maybe I can't do this.

You can.

He looks terrible.

Gene?

Gene?

Im sorry

I haven't been.

I've been trying.

You have whiskers.

Im here. I made it.

What do you

want me to say?

Im so sorry that--

You listening to me?

You never used to.

I n one ear and, I'd

always think, straight

out the same ear.

So, are you

listening now?

I was always here.

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