Airplane! Page #9

Elaine is speaking to couple.

ELAINE:

I'm sorry I had to wake you. I'm just

looking for a doctor. There's nothing to

worry about.

Middle-aged lady, MRS. YAFFE, having overheard this

conversation, beckons to Elaine.

MRS. YAFFE

Stewardess, I think the man next to me is

a doctor.

The MAN next to her is wearing a surgical cap with mask.

Hanging around his neck is a stethoscope. He's sleeping.

ELAINE:

Sir. Excuse me, sir. I'm sorry to have to

wake you. Are you a doctor?

DR. RUMACK

That's right.

ELAINE:

We have some passengers who are very sick.

Could you come and take a look at them?

DR. RUMACK

Yes. Yes, of course.

Rumack picks up bag and exits with Elaine.

INT. PASSENGER CABIN - ANOTHER AREA - NIGHT

Rumack and Elaine enter. Rumack stoops over to Shirley, and

surgical instrument is slapped into his hand from o.s. He

pokes her stomach with his hand.

DR. RUMACK

Pain there?

She winces and nods.

DR. RUMACK

May I see your tongue, please?

She sticks her tongue out. Rumack pulls on it until it is

obviously too long. He continues to pull, and the tongue

becomes multi-colored magician's scarves. Then he pulls out

a bouquet of flowers followed by a white dove.

DR. RUMACK

I'll be back in a minute.

Rumack takes Elaine aside.

DR. RUMACK

You'd better tell the Captain. We've got

to land as soon as we can. This woman has

to be gotten to a hospital.

ELAINE:

A hospital? What is it?

DR. RUMACK

It's a big building with patients. But

that's not important right now. Tell the

Captain I must speak to him.

ELAINE:

Certainly.

EXT. AIRPLANE - THUNDER AND LIGHTNING - NIGHT

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

OVEUR:

(into mike)

Thank you, Omaha. Two-zero-niner out.

(to Basta)

Victor, we're running into a heavy storm,

can you...

Oveur turns to see Basta slumped over the console.

Dramatic MUSIC.

OVEUR:

Victor! Roger, take over!

Oveur lifts Basta onto ground.

EXT. AIRPLANE - NIGHT

THUNDER and lightning.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

Murdock, flying the plane alone, wipes his brow and appears

ill.

INT. PASSENGER CABIN - OUTSIDE COCKPIT DOOR - NIGHT

DR. RUMACK

Captain, how soon can we land?

OVEUR:

I can't tell.

DR. ROMACK

You can tell me. I'm a doctor!

OVEUR:

No. I mean I'm just not sure.

DR. RUMACK

Can't you take a guess?

OVEUR:

Well...not for another two hours.

DR. RUMACK

You can't take a guess for another two

hours?

OVEUR:

No, I mean we can't land for another two

hours. Fog has closed down everything this

side of the mountains. We've got to go

through to Chicago!

Suddenly, the plane rocks violently. Rumack and Oveur lose

balance.

EXT. AIRPLANE - NIGHT

THUNDER and lightning -- plane is flying erratically.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

Murdock, unconscious, is slumped over controls. Oveur and

Rumack burst into cockpit. Oveur gets into pilot's seat.

Elaine enters.

OVEUR:

(excitedly)

Get him out of there!

INSERT - ALTIMETER AND FLIGHT CONTROLS

Altitude is fluctuating.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

Oveur struggles with controls. They extricate Murdock from

behind the wheel. He is wearing shorts, kneepads, and

basketball shoes.

EXT. AIRPLANE - NIGHT

climbing and diving.

INT. PASSENGER CABIN - NIGHT

Passengers are being tossed about. A woman, applying

lipstick, smears it over her face.

INSERT - LIGHTED SYMBOLS

-- cigarette with line slashed through, and couple

copulating with line slashed through.

INT. CABIN - NIGHT

Randy loses her balance and shoves dinner into a passenger's

face.

INT. COCKPIT - OVEUR - NIGHT

struggling with controls, finally regains level flight.

EXT. AIRPLANE - NIGHT

THUNDER and lightning -- plane levels off.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

The St. Christopher statue is holding a motion discomtort

bag to its mouth.

OVEUR:

What is it, Doctor? What's happening?

DR. RUMACK

I'm not sure. I haven't seen anything like

this since the Lina Wertmuller Film

Festival.

Rumack and Elaine are now standing face-to-face. Oveur, in

the f.g., is at controls.

DR. RUMACK

What was it we had for dinner tonight?

ELAINE:

Well, we had a choice. Steak or fish.

DR. RUMACK

Yes, yes, I remember. I had lasagna.

He points to Johnson.

DR. RUMACK

What did he have?

ELAINE:

He had fish.

Randy enters cockpit.

RANDY:

We have two more sick people, and the rest

of the passengers are worried.

OVEUR:

I'll take care of the passengers. Elaine,

find out what the two sick people had for

dinner.

(into P.A.)

This is Captain Oveur speaking.

INT. PASSENGER CABIN - NIGHT

Passengers are listening to P.A.

OVEUR (v.o.)

It's been a little bumpy up here but we'll

be past it in a few minutes.

Randy and Elaine drag Murodck and Basta down center aisle.

OVEUR (v.o.)

A couple points of interest: we're just

now passing over the Hoover Dam and later

on, our course will take us just south of

the Grand Canyon.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

OVEUR:

Meanwhile, relax and enjoy the rest of

your flight. Okay? Okay!

He hangs up phone and turns to Rumack.

OVEUR:

That should do it.

INT. PASSENGER CABIN - NIGHT

Absolute pandemonium. Passengers are yelling, screaming,

tearing their hair out, climbing about.

INT. COCKPIT - NIGHT

OVEUR:

(into microphone)

Chicago, this is flight two-zero-niner.

We're in trouble.

INT. O'HARE WEATHER CENTER - CLOSEUP - TYPEWRITER - NIGHT

CAMERA PULLS OUT to reveal DISPATCHER typing Oveur's

message.

OVEUR (v.o.)

We've got to have all altitudes below us

cleared and priority approach and landing

in Chicago. Over.

DISPATCHER:

We read you. Stand by, two-zero-niner.

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