Alice in Wonderland Page #7

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Later... Later, I'm in my

singing mode right now.

"Beautiful Soup so rich and green,

Waiting in a hot tureen!

Who for such dainties, would not stoop?

Soup of the evening,

Beautiful Soup!

Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Soo-oop of the e-e-evening.

Beau-ootiful, soo-oo... take it Alice!

Soo-oop!

Needs a little work, but we'll get it.

Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish.

Game or any other dish!

Who would not give all else

for two Pennyworth only of Beautiful Soup!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Soo-oop of the e-e-evening.

Beau-oooo...

...tiful soooo-oooop!"

And now my dear - I think

you're ready to find your way

And they say this sort of

thing is only for the rich.

One more chorus, dear fellow!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Beau-ootiful Soo-oop!

Soo-oop of the e-e-evening.

Beau-oooo...

...tiful soo-oop.

Beau-ootiful soup so...

Oh dear.

I was forgetting...

Ah, perhaps this is the way out.

Ahoy! Ahoy! She's my prisoner, you know!

And I've come to rescue her.

We'll have to fight for her.

You'll observe the rules of battle, of course.

I always do.

Good man.

Take that! Oh!

Curse my weak wrists!

You're worthy opponent, sir.

Another day perhaps?

Another day, sir!

Thank you very much...

That was a glorious victory, wasn't it?

As an encore I do the Battle of Agincourt.

- Here let me help you take your helmet off.

- Yes...

Oh, I can breathe now.

Thank you.

I see you're admiring my box.

It's my own invention to keep sandwiches in.

You see I carry it upside-down so

they don't get wet when it rains.

But they can drop out, the lid is open.

So that's what happened to my sandwiches!

Do you know why I did that?

No.

It's now a bee's nest.

I should be getting some honey very soon.

But you already have a bee-hive.

Oh, one of the best...

but the bees won't come near it.

Same with this.

It's better mouse-trap.

Come to think of it

I shouldn't be surprised if the

mice don't keep the bees out...

or the bees keep the mice

out... one or the other.

But why would you need a mouse-trap?

You won't find many mice running

around on the backs of horse's.

But if there were he'd be

protected, wouldn't you old chap.

Are you alright?

I hope you've got your hair fastened on tight?

Only in the usual way.

Well, that's not good enough.

The wind is as strong as soup around here.

You must be ready for anything.

Then nothing can frighten you.

You don't seem to have much riding practice.

What makes you say that?

You keep falling off your horse.

I've had plenty of practice

at that... plenty of practice.

Yes, I suppose you have.

The art of riding is to keep your balance.

Hold this.

What is it?

I forget but I know it was a bargain...

Plenty of practice... plenty of practice...

Mr Knight!

You see, our bodies are driven by our legs

and our legs are driven by our feet...

How can you go on talking

when you're like this?

Like what?

Head-downwards and body in the air.

What does it matter where

my body happens to be?

My mind goes on working just the same.

It's a hive of activity.

Ideas! Ideas! Ideas!

In fact the more head-downwards I

am, the more I keep inventing things.

The cleverest thing I ever invented

I thought of head-downwards.

And what was that?

A new pudding.

Come to think of it, I don't believe

that pudding was ever cooked.

Why, what was it made of?

Blotting-pepper!

Uh, that wouldn't have been very nice.

Not very nice alone...

but mixing it with other things

like gunpowder and sealing wax

gives it a true taste of the Cordon-Bleus...

Now I must leave you.

I've still dragons to slay

and young ladies to rescue.

You look worried. You're too young to worry.

Look at me I don't worry.

Well, I was thinking about the things

I have to do when I go home...

You're going home?

I don't want to but perhaps I should.

Just be brave. And always

get back on your horse.

Just keep your balance at all times. Yes, yes.

Can you tell me the how

to get out of the forest?

Plenty of practice, pl-ahhh!

Before you go!

Good-bye! Just be brave!

Mr Knight!

Oh, Tiger-lily,

I wish you could talk so you could

tell me how to get out of this wood?

I can talk when there's

anybody worth talking to.

Can all flowers talk?

As well as you...

It isn't manner for us to speak first.

We were wondering if you'd speak.

I thought your face had got some sense on it.

Not much, but some.

Hmm but the colouring's right.

Oh, I don't care about her colour...

If only her petals curled

more she'd be all right.

Aren't you frightened of growing out here,

with no-one to look after you?

There's plenty of trees. What

else are they good for?

But what good are trees

when danger comes near?

They have a good bark.

You didn't know that did you?!

Silence all of you!

They're only like that

because I can't get at them,

they're to close to the ground.

If you're not polite, I'll make you into a chain!

Daisies are worst of all,

next to Snap-Dragons.

How is it that all of you can talk so well?

I've been in lots of gardens and I've

never heard flowers talk before.

Feel the ground.

It's very hard.

Ah, in most gardens the

flower-beds are too soft,

so the flowers are always asleep.

I see... I never thought of that.

In my opinion, I doubt if you ever think at all.

Hold your tongue, all of you!

Now which way out of the wood?

That way.

That way.

Ere this way... that way!

Definitely that way.

That way! That way... er.

Over there! Don't step on us!

Look, we're standing still as waxworks.

And if you think we're waxworks

you should pay for the privilege of looking.

Wax-works aren't made to

be looked at for nothing.

No-how!

Contrariwise, if you think we're alive,

we ought to introduce ourselves.

I am Mr Tweedledum and

this is Mr Tweddledee.

I'm Alice.

Does the name Veronica

Buff mean anything to you?

No, who is she?

I don't know but we're obviously

doing her a favour mentioning her.

Do you think she'll be grateful

if she becomes famous?

No-how!

I was just thinking of that poem of you two.

"Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

Agreed to have a battle.

For Tweedledum said Tweedledee

Had spoiled his nice new rattle.

Just then flew down a monstrous crow.

As black as a tar-barrel.

Which frightened both the heroes so.

They quite forgot their quarrel.

There's no monstrous crow!

You recited that poem very nicely.

Congratters... but it isn't us,

No-how!

No it's another set of er

Tweedledums and Tweedledees.

Altogether completely different

people, the names are the same.

Contrariwise, you began all wrong.

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