Angus Thongs And Perfect Snogging Page #7

to New Zealand might upset all of us.

He just doesn't get it.

We're arguing at all hours of the day.

I don't suppose

the time difference helps.

Yeah, well, exactly.

Maybe we should stay here

and let him go off on his own.

I should have left mine ages ago.

Now I can do what I want when I want.

But don't you think

the little one misses him?

No! He has the monster

every other weekend.

Which is more than he bloody did

when we were together.

- Listen, I've got to go. I'm meeting Jem.

- Lucky you!

Oh, behave. Georgia! Are you up, love?

I need you to watch Libby after school.

I've got salsa group.

- Can I help you?

- Hi.

- I'm Georgia Nicolson.

- Bob's daughter?

Yeah.

Would it be possible

to speak with his boss?

Well, I'm afraid Mr Hunter's

already left for the day.

- Is there something I can help you with?

- It's my dad.

He's been gone so long.

It was a great honour for him to get that

promotion. Everyone here wanted it.

Yeah.

- He's good at his job, right?

- Yes.

What was it you wanted

to say to Mr Hunter?

You're going to think I'm mad,

but I was going to ask him

if my dad could come back.

You see, we really don't want to

move out to New Zealand.

But we don't want him to

leave us and stay there,

and me and my little sister

really want him to come home,

and I know my mum does, too.

She just might not tell him

on the phone, because, well...

I just really don't want us to be apart.

Hi, I'm back.

Thanks, darling, for holding down

the fort. I had such a great time.

And you're making dinner, too.

How wonderful.

Georgie, I want you to know how much

I appreciate you helping out

these past few weeks.

No problem, Mum.

Georgie, you've been so good

and I'm ready to talk

about this party you want so badly.

- I don't want it any more.

- What?

But you and Jas have been

planning this for months.

I can't explain it, Mum.

I just don't want a party.

I want to go to New Zealand.

- What?

- I've been really thinking about it,

and it's a huge opportunity for Dad.

And we shouldn't stand in his way.

As his wife,

you should support him, too.

There are five things

I will do now to be more mature

and prepare for

my new life in New Zealand.

One, stop reading magazines

and do Sudoku instead,

to maximise brain size

and stop Alzheimer's.

Two, do yoga every morning and night

and cleanse my body of toxicity

by banishing all negative feelings

towards ex-best friends

and bass players.

Three, listen to dolphins,

because they're clever and unselfish.

Four, no more chips.

Only organic fruit and veg.

Although not from Robbie's shop.

Five, a new style for a new me.

Hi.

I sort of need to ask you something

because you'll know.

You know, I don't blame you for

not wanting to talk to me.

What you said really hurt,

but you were right. It wasn't me.

It was beyond pants,

and I really am sorry.

I messed everything up with you,

and with Dave and your brother.

I guess I was just jealous

that Jas had a boyfriend...

I broke up with Lindsay last night.

You know, I wrote a song about you.

- Really?

- It's called B*tch In A Uniform.

I wrote it when I was pissed off with you.

But I still like you, Georgia.

- Even though you are mad.

- No, you don't.

I do.

I can't stop thinking about you.

I was hoping...

- Maybe we can go out?

- Oh, no.

- I'm moving to New Zealand.

- What?

What is wrong with you?

You're so random.

That's what I wanted to

talk to you about.

My dad's just got a job out there.

And, at first, I said I didn't want to leave.

And then my mum started acting weird

with this builder guy.

And so I said I'll go out there.

I guess I really just

don't want my folks to split up.

Hey, no one does.

At least you're doing something about it.

It's just a shame you're leaving.

No, hold my hand, you muppet,

so we can at least walk together,

so we don't look like sad gits.

Okay.

I was experimenting before

I dyed the whole thing.

Don't dye it blonde.

It's much nicer natural.

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday, dear Georgia

Happy Birthday to you

- Blow them out.

- Blow out the candles.

It's from all of us.

We want you to get whatever you want.

A mobile phone? And maybe

something nice to wear for tonight.

- Why? What's happening tonight?

- We're going out dancing.

- Jem's not coming, is he?

- No, hon, just me and you.

- I'm taking you to your first night club.

- Not Tramps.

That's where Lindsay's having her party.

Tramps? That is so last year.

- We're going to a brand new club.

- That sounds great, Mum.

Shall we go and call Dad?

Well, I'm sure he'll call later.

It's the wrong time out there, so...

Okay, Libby, well, be a good girl,

won't you?

- I'm going to bed now.

- Yeah.

And I'll come and get you

in the morning.

- See you in the morning!

- Okay. All right, then.

- Night, night. Love you. Bye.

- Bye-bye.

- You look so beautiful.

- Thanks.

Come on, munchkin.

Mum, this looks pretty cool,

but it's dead.

Are you sure you got the right address?

It's supposed to be

the most happening joint in town.

Oh, Mum.

You all right?

Happy Birthday, Georgia!

Oh, my God! Mum.

Jas helped me

organise the whole thing.

What?

Georgia.

There's someone else

you have to thank, too.

Jem's been an angel.

- Thanks, Jem.

- It was my pleasure.

Georgia, we have

another surprise for you.

We weren't quite sure when

the right time to do this...

- Mum!

- What?

- Please don't get divorced.

- What are you on about?

Look.

Come on.

Looking good.

Hey.

- Dad.

- I told you

I wouldn't miss your birthday party.

But what about New Zealand?

We're supposed to be coming out there.

Honey, it must've been really hard

for you to come to my office.

When I heard what happened,

- well, it broke my heart.

- Dad.

Well, you made quite

an impression, little lady.

My boss ordered me home immediately.

They offered

me a great new position, here.

Really?

- We're not leaving.

- I know.

Now, why on earth did you think

I was divorcing your dad?

Divorce? What's going on?

I just thought that because you've been

wearing tight tops and more lippy,

and it looked like you and Jem were...

You see. It just looked really...

Happy Birthday, Georgia.

Jem's boyfriend owns this club.

He helped arrange all of this for you.

Interior decorator? Hello.

Your father may drive us mad

but I love him to bits.

This is the best party ever.

Put your hands in the air

and wave them like you just don't care!

Let me hear you say...

Make some noise for the Stiff Dylans!

- Who invited them?

- Your mum did.

- What?

- I know a fittie when I see one.

Now, this is a new song I wrote

and it's about Georgia.

And it's called Ultraviolet.

She is a wave

And she's breaking

She's a problem to solve

And in that circle she's making

I will always revolve

And on her sight

these eyes depend

Invisible and indivisible

That fire you ignited

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