Another WolfCop Page #4

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Okay.

So, what's her story?

You mean besides the fact

that she is off limits to you

and anyone else in here?

We were tight growing up...

I mean, super tight.

She basically raised me,

which is weird,

because you know,

she's my younger sister.

Down the drain

Flush it

Flush it

Yeah, but then

a few years ago, man,

she changed, like,

f***ing out of nowhere...

you know,

sealed herself off.

I didn't see her.

It's like I was lost.

Bambi in the woods.

It was really tough.

Why?

MUTANT:

'Cause he wants to f*** her.

You say something?

I'm pretty f***ing tuckered.

MUTANT:

Get all up in that ass!

Well, I'm hungry?

Is there a f***ing menu?

I could eat for two.

[SLAP]

- [CRASH]

- [GROANS]

Is that my sister?

To recovery.

And to abstinence

and respecting

people's siblings.

MUTANT:
Give me my drink!

You okay?

Uh, yeah.

No, I mean,

I'm not feeling right exactly.

- I'm gonna... I'm gonna...

- Lou, hey, let me out.

- Run, run, run, run.

- Let me out of here.

LOU:
[GRUNTING]

Yeah.

I'm gonna go tuck in.

Flush it

WILLIE:
Bye.

Now

Does he seem

a bit off to you?

ILSA:
The rink thermostat

has been dialed in.

The embryos have stabilized.

Everything

is coming together.

SWALLOWS:
Well, then,

we should really thank

that hairy lycan f***!

If he hadn't dwindled

our numbers so much,

we wouldn't have pushed

for this final solution.

Excellent.

[SNIFFS]

No bogarting

the devil's lettuce, brother.

[INHALING]

[INHALES, EXHALES]

Okay, man.

Easy, T-rex arms.

I got you, man.

[INHALES]

[COUGHING]

[JAMAICAN ACCENT]

Everything is irie.

[LAUGHS]

[DOOR BANGS OPEN]

WILLIE:
Sh*t!

What the f***?

What the f***

are they doing?

Motherfuckers!

F***ing Lou Garou's

about to use

his f***ing freedom stick

on my sister.

MUTANT:
Bang, bang,

chicken shrimp.

No more weed for you.

[BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY]

[GRUNTS]

[EXHALES SHARPLY]

Is that moon dust?

I thought you said...

This isn't for you.

[SNIFFING]

[EXHALES SHARPLY]

KAT:
[EXHALES SHARPLY]

[MOANING]

Hey, you starting

without me?

KAT:
[MOANING]

[GRUNTING]

[DEEP GRUNTING]

[PURRING]

[SCREAMING]

Motherf***er!

[PANTING]

Well, they say I should

approach you with caution

- [YOWLS]

- [GRUNTS]

- Aah!

- [YOWLS]

But not to let you be aware

of my fear

[BOTH MOANING]

Never know

what you'll find

Don't understand your kind

'Round here

KAT:
[PURRING]

Uh-huh

Watching your moves,

they look so radical

Hearing the words,

they sound fanatical

Something inside reveals

you're magical

Oh, oh

How can I get enough?

You're a strange animal

That's what I know

But you're a strange animal

I got to follow

Whoa, ho

[BOTH GRUNTING IN DISTANCE]

Ugh! I still hear em'!

I can't listen to this sh*t,

man.

[BOTH GRUNTING,

MOANING IN DISTANCE]

You're a loser.

It's just a fact.

- Take that!

- But what if I told you

that I could help you change

all of that.

- I'm a winner.

- Hey.

But then you probably

already know that.

You like that, man?

- I'm also a connoisseur...

- Okay, lil' dude!

SWALLOWS:
...and a curator

of the best life has to offer.

That's your jam?

Leveraging my excellent palate

and Darkstar technology,

- we've strategically...

- You feeling okay, man?

Hmm?

[MUTANT GRUNTING]

[WILLIE GROANS IN PAIN]

So, slam a cold cock.

[SCREAMS]

And unleash a better you.

[SCREAMING]

[AIR HISSES]

Wow!

This is impressive.

This is why rinks

cost so much

'cause they're always putting

stuff like this underneath

and then they work it

into the price of the ticket.

Whole thing reminds me

of this porno I invested in once

called

"The C*nt for Red October."

It didn't go over very well

'cause people

don't like that word...

October.

The nicest part about it,

it's a hockey rink.

And there is nothing

I like in this world

more than hockey.

Well, except maybe fat stacks

of colored cash.

Well, then, here's to

a fruitful partnership.

Mm. Look at all that money.

Thank you!

Now this.

This is worth leaving

my Zumba class early for.

[CAN OPENS]

Mmm.

I'm gonna slam a cold cock.

[SLURPING]

Ooh.

[SLURPING]

Whoa-ho.

Ahh.

Crisp.

Oh, you really like your beer,

don't you?

[SIGHS] Feels good,

really feels good,

so you guys ready

for the puck drop or what?

Almost.

We still have to test

our PA system.

You're here just in time.

[WHIRRING]

[STOMACH RUMBLES]

[FARTING]

You heard that, right?

- [LOUD FART]

- Oh!

Why do I...

[FARTING, GROANING]

Oh.

Ohh!

You son of a b*tch, Syd!

[GROANING IN PAIN]

[CHILDLIKE LAUGHTER]

What the f***!

[MUTANT SCREECHING]

It's glorious!

[MUTANT SCREECHING]

Aah! Aah!

[SCREAMING]

Get it off!

You son of a b*tch!

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMING]

Aah!

[MUTANT CHATTERING]

[CRASH]

TINA:
[WHISPERING]

Come on, come on.

[GRUNTING]

[MUTANT CHATTERS]

Did he sh*t himself?

TINA:
Daisy!

[ALARM SOUNDS]

[GRUNTS]

KAT:
[EXHALES SHARPLY]

So, that happened.

Yeah. Does Willie know?

Well, we were pretty loud.

No, I mean about you

being...

F***ing with you.

I wanted to tell him,

but he wasn't himself.

Even now I feel like

he's hiding something...

[BANGING ON DOOR]

WILLIE:
Hey!

F***ing Turner and Hooch,

stop f***ing please!

Coming William.

Sh*t just got real!

Come out, come out

wherever you are little buddy!

Just be a man.

I got more of that

f***ing weed.

You guys keep your eyes

f***ing peeled.

He's fast,

and he's f***ing bulbous.

Who?

Bad Willie.

[HISSING]

That's a shifter hiss!

What are you...

No way he's a f***ing shifter,

but he's smaller, nastier.

and I think he's my son.

[CHATTER SOUNDS]

[SQUEALING]

[SCREAMING]

F***ing Karma!

[SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

[MUTANT CHATTERS]

[POTS AND PANS CLANG]

[CHATTERING]

Move.

That was the worst f***ing

four hours of my life.

You were so loud,

you didn't even hear me

f***ing crown!

LOU:
Oh, god damn!

I just gave birth to that.

[MUTANT CHATTERS]

Shoot this f***er.

Nope, he's my dude.

I can't.

[GUNSHOT]

- [SQUEALS]

- Ohh!

Ohh!

[GROANS]

[HEAVY BREATHING]

What? Like, you two

don't have secrets?

KAT:
This is bad.

Earth's atmosphere prevents

Shifters from reproducing,

but if they've found a way

to impregnate humans...

...we're f***ed.

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

[CELLPHONE RINGS]

Hello?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down.

Don't do anything.

We're on our way.

DJ BOB:
Hey, Dan,

we're tick, tick, tickin' down

to the big game between

the Woodhaven Darkstars

and those rotten

Regina Potashers!

DJ DAN:

Ooh, I can't wait!

And between that,

and the throwing of the switch

on the new brewery,

folks are calling Swallows

the savior of Woodhaven,

while others fear we may be

putting too many eggs

in that old

Chicken Milk basket.

DJ BOB:
Oh boy!

Don't forget to stock up

on game gitch.

The first hundred

through the door

get a free skate sharpening

compliments of...

- Liquor Donuts!

- Liquor Donuts!

Thank God.

- Oh, you good.

- Now we're good.

- Oh.

- Oh! Uh...

- Tina.

- Okay.

TINA:
Lou, how are you?

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