Antibirth Page #2

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need to turn into a turtle?

And what kind of trouble

are you in

that you need to be a turtle.

I can see you being a cheetah.

- Hey, Sadie, what the f***?

What do you have

against turtles, man?

All kinds of f***in'

turtle trouble

you put on your

stealth situation..

Aah!

- Oh!

Oh, oh, sh*t.

- Hey!

Hey, get away from my car.

- You passing through, lady?

- I said get away from my car.

- You looking for work?

- No.

Move!

- You're old,

but there's a lot of guys

who are really into that sh*t.

- Get the f*** away from me.

Get out of here.

Get out of here.

- You like playing with knives?

Careful out there, lady.

Don't get lost, okay?

- I tell you, friends,

if you've got to

train for war,

this is the place to do it.

- Mm...Oh, Sadie,

the last thing I remember

mm...Is going off with Warren.

And then it's just blank.

You know, I got nothing.

- We were partying all day.

You were pretty lit by the time

we got out there.

- I remember coming back here

with you, though, right?

I mean...

I remember coming back home.

- Yeah, and you passed out.

- Yeah, but I woke up here.

- Looks like you got

your appetite back.

- Oh, yeah.

You know,

you go to these doctors..

...and they don't give a sh*t,

they don't care.

You know, it's just in, out,

give you some pills.

Sh*t, man, I got pills.

Mm, I gotta go into work,

man, 'cause I am broke.

- How long you been out?

- Well..

Well...I had to go out

all weekend.

You know,

i gotta pick up a shift

'cause after that,

i got nothing.

- Can't you just go down

to Tonya's, work in her store?

- No, man, f*** that.

I mean..

...it's basically impossible

to get in there on time,

you know?

I mean, I kinda need

to make my own hours.

- It's gonna be alright, Lou.

- So sick of this sh*t, man.

I live in a goddamn dump, Sadie.

I mean, I can barely

even take care of myself

let alone some weird

immaculate conception sh*t.

- Sh*t, look at that.

Hey, come on,

remember that place?

That's the buck lanes.

They turned it into

a f***in' funzone?

- No, the parties are not gonna

be the same around there, man.

- For pizza and bowling

lots and lots of crazy fun.

- Go, Lou.

- Come on!

- Parking lot.

- Good job, good job.

- Oh!

- It's the third time

you sent her out tonight.

- She's popular,

what can I say?

- Can I, can I get

one of those baggies?

- I'd be making a whole lot

more money if it wasn't for you.

- I need the stimulation.

- Don't give me that sh*t.

- Hello.

- Hey, why don't you back off,

weirdo.

- Weirdo.

- Yeah.

You look weird.

What, are you interested

in cars?

- I'm more interested

in what's inside.

- Oh?

Well, it looks like

she's almost done.

But it's a little extra

if you wanna watch.

- Lou!

Lou!

You alright?

- Uh, hey.

You know, sometimes these

squatters come around here.

Thought I heard someone

banging around outside.

- Well, you should

get that fixed.

- Oh, yeah.

- Yeah.

- It's old, but it's free.

- Hey, that's a nice ride,

looks sweet.

- Yeah, it was my dad's.

He drove it out here once,

he never used it again.

- You sure are way

the f*** out here.

Let's get outta here, man.

Let's go.

Alrighty.

- You got a haircut?

- Don't mess my hair, man.

- I'm not messing

your hair up.

I'm helping your hair.

- It took me a while

to fix it.

- My problem was never

your looks.

It was always

just your attitude.

- What do you mean

my attitude? What's wrong

with my attitude?

- Do I look really f***in'

bloated to you?

Or is that my imagination?

Let me tell you what I need.

Candy..

- Uh-huh.

- Money.

- Uh-huh.

- And whip-its.

- Whip-its?

- You put the little charger

in the cracker, go..

- Got it.

- And your mind goes..

Whomp, whomp, whomp.

Whomp, whomp, whomp.

- I get it. I get it. I get it.

- Man, do my tits

look bigger to you?

- Yeah, your tits

kinda got big.

Sh*t, what are you doing?

- Listen, I know

we fool around.

But I'm telling you,

one of these days..

...it's just gonna be

just right..

...the moon's gonna be out

the right song's

gonna be playing.

- The moon's gonna come out

that night.

- Smoke a little weed.

- Smoke a little joint, yeah.

- Drink a little juice.

- Mm-hm.

- And see what happens.

- Just go with the flow.

What are you getting?

- Luke, I need you to go

in there

and get me a pregnancy test.

- What?

No, man, no, no,

get it yourself.

- Man, I feel like sh*t.

Look, if I go in there,

everyone's just gonna think

I'm pregnant.

If you go in there, everyone's

gonna think, you know,

"look, he's getting laid.

On top of that, he's being

a good dude, you know?"

- Man.

- Come on.

Just do this for me, alright?

L -- look, if you

do this for me

I'll give you a blowj*b,

alright?

What?

Alright, it'll be like

i gave you a blowj*b.

I'm saying, I would be willing

to give a blowj*b if I had to

for you to just go

f***ing do this for me, man.

- Sh*t.

- Alright?

- Alright, how..

You got some money?

- Take this, that's like $19.

Oh, and get me some of those,

uh...Gummy bears, gummy worms.

- Gummy bears, alright.

- Yeah.

Oh, f***!

- Hey!

Come on, hey, you can help me!

Let me talk to you

for a second!

- Nah, man,

i don't have anything!

- You can help me out.

- No, man,

i don't have anything, okay?

What, dude?

I don't have anything, okay?

- Just a second, come on! F***!

Hey, open the window..

- Sorry, don't have any cash.

- I can't talk to you

through the f***ing window.

Open the window.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, buddy.

Buddy, buddy, buddy.

Hey, hey, hey.

- F***ing hell!

- Move, move.

Get away, get away.

Take a walk.

You alright?

- Yeah, yeah.

- Uh, here.

Let's get outta here.

- Thanks.

- I don't know what Gabriel

sells to those freaks

but it turns them pretty quick.

Now, he -- he's into

some trucker speed

he got into with the marines.

- I'll tell you right now,

okay? It's a bunch of garbage.

He got kicked out for selling..

...and he runs around

bragging that it was some

special ops bs, you know?

- What?

- He can't even

get it up sometimes.

'Cause of all the tests

they did on him.

That's why he's such a maniac.

- I don't mess around

with that sh*t.

You don't know what they put

in that, you know,

you get nonsense.

- Man, I know where it goes.

- Aw, man.

- You know.

- Yep.

Oh, sh*t, hey, hey, Lou!

Don't forget this.

- Oh, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

- Here you go, good luck.

I hope you're not pregnant.

- I hope you're not pregnant.

- I hope you're not pregnant...

Sexy.

Lou, Lou, Lou. Mm, mm, mm.

- Hey.

- Yeah.

- So there was a bachelor party

in room 36.

Whole bunch of guys

and I put some rubber sheets

in there for you.

Said that they had

a pretty good time.

And I caught my girlfriend's kid

watchin' me in the shower again.

- Oh, yeah!

- He's a total spaz, but, um

this is supposed

to mellow him out.

- Yeah, great.

- Uh...I feel like sh*t.

Have you seen Warren lately?

- No, I think he's working over

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