April Fools Page #2

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to earth people"

"Finish up their tasks"

I'm out.

Miso ramen please.

A negi ramen for me.

Coming.

Dam, I forgot to walk my dog.

Oh, dear, I have an emergency too.

Cancel our order please.

Boss, give us the

whole menu.

Crab omelet.

- Coming.

Beer.

Dumplings

- How many?

Don't count them,

give us all you have.

Are you keeping us waiting?

My crab omelet.

Shut up moron.

- Sorry.

You remember the other one.

Right.

His eyes were very sharp.

Sharp eyes.

Salt n'pepper hair.

Salt n'pepper.

Where's my sister?

Like it?

I'm asking you if you like it.

Delicious.

Did I ask you?

Sorry.

Hey.

Close to here there's an theme park.

You like theme parks?

You keep quiet and

I'll take you there.

You have to be quiet.

I gave a lecture in Moscow

on biological transplants.

They ovationed me,

even Putin was there.

President putin?

He was so enthusiastic about judo.

In fact I'm a black belt myself.

So we had a friendly fight.

He didn't stand a chance.

He tried to overthrow me.

But I'm very good

at the pinning technique.

Would you try that pinning on me?

Let's go.

- The dessert is coming.

You'll be my dessert.

We have a room with a splendid city night view.

Sorry, we're not serving lunch anymore.

Calm down.

Sorry, she's one of my patients.

She makes up stuff,

she's mentally unstable.

I'm not making up stuff.

Look at me, I'm pregnant.

I expect you to do the right thing.

If you don't.

I'll kill the both

of us right here.

You're pushing the joke too far.

Let's get out.

I apologize, we're fine.

Really?

- She's a patient.

I'll take you to the hospital.

Easy, now.

Threatening me with a toy won't help.

It's probably not even my kid.

I dare you to kill me then.

You're really obnoxious.

That was really awesome.

I'll kill you.

Call 911.

Someone handle the crazy b*tch.

Could you guys,

all gather in the center.

You, in the kitchen.

Could you hurry.

Please, everyone let's

follow the instructions.

Don't upset her.

What are you waiting for.

Mr. Wataru Makino.

Please come now.

If you don't come out.

I'll kill them all one by one.

I'll start with the girl.

Wait, wait.

Say

you're joking, right?

It's an april fool's prank, right?

April fool?

What da? April fool?!

Don't give me that april fool BS.

I'm so screwed.

Who are you?

I'm the chef and owner,

bringing a cherry pimento.

That chandelier cost me a fortune.

The dog is so cute.

I want that dog.

Waf!

You're enjoying?

You could say something, brat.

I'll throw you out.

Come on, it's all checked.

Are you dull?

Are you expecting ransom money?

What if I am?

It's a waste of time.

My parents wouldn't pay a cent for me.

Because of your low scores?

I'm dull and I'm a difficult kid.

"You're cute only as much

as you're cared for".

The fact is

I'm an illegitimate kid.

Who told you that?

I found it out.

Especially my father,

I'm so not like him.

Many kids don't

look like their parents.

You've been abused?

My parents don't hit me.

They don't even scold me.

A difficult kid?

Shoplifting?

You're a habitual criminal?

Your parents don't get mad?

They gave up on me.

They just find my presence

annoying at home.

But they're good with my brother.

I want to finish studying,

leave them and live my life.

How will you live.

I'll do anything.

A woman can always find money.

If your purpose is to mollest me.

Let's get it over with

and release me soon.

If I had such intention

I'd tell you on my own good time.

I'm so full.

That was delicious.

Indeed.

Your your.

Your coffee, Madam.

Did you get burned?

You incompetent idiot, what have you done.

Please forgive me.

Please accept our apologies.

Forgive her on account

of her young age.

Will you forgive us.

I'm so sorry.

I too, shall apologize.

I'm responsible for bringing you

into that worthless place.

Such insects as ourselves

are not worthy of life.

You can dispose of this worthless place.

Of my blood, my sweat and tears.

You can crush us as you please.

Humbly I'm asking you.

I'm so sorry.

I don't want to commit seppuku.

Well.

Please stand up.

'We' should apologize.

For how much did you scam them?

Do not smear people's reputation.

I have a duty to

this world and to people.

There's a name for your kind

of scam, imposture.

I'm really exorcising the spirits.

You can't fool me, grandma.

Don't call me grandma,

they call me Spiritual Guide.

You fool no one with this.

Or is it because the world

in its vastness

simply escapes your understanding.

Deep down you know I tell the truth.

You give me a break, old hag.

It's water.

No way.

Our real name is not Sakurakoji.

But Kobayashi, in fact.

I'm retired.

I used to be a desk employee.

What?

We met in the singing club

in our university.

We've been married 40 years.

Our daily life is very common.

We're an ordinary couple.

Please don't get mad.

My wife has been diagnosed

with cancer 10 months ago.

She's been treated in bed

all that time.

I wasn't improving

and often lost hope.

Until my husband

found a new treatment.

And then

a miracle happened.

The tumors vanished.

Goodness.

For just one day.

I asked what whim

she'd like to fulfill.

I said let's take our savings

and live the big life.

Let it be sumptuous.

I thought of Audrey Hepburn

in 'Roman Holiday'.

I wanted

I wanted to live the day of a princess.

Really, I had no idea

it would go that far.

We apologize.

Forgive us.

So that's what it was.

You scared us, Mr. Kobayashi.

You did cause a commotion here.

I guess we'll just have

to forgive you

since you did it to please Madam.

Chauffeur, we apologize to you too.

You don't fool me

I can see you're aristocrats.

What?

Simple servants like us

have an instinct.

I know you lied to them.

Oh no, we didn't lie.

It's fine.

Your stratagem was such a relief

for these simple people.

It was so graceful of you.

I'm telling you we didn't lie.

I know you're his excellency Sakurakoji.

That's the truth.

But it's a lie.

Absolutely, it's a lie.

I get it. So, where

do I drive you next?

Come on get out of the kitchen.

She's gonna die.

10

Please Doctor come out.

She means business.

You're a black belt.

9

You're a black belt?

What's a black belt

to do against a gun.

Alright it's a Tokarev,

only six rounds.

I have a friend in the police.

She fired 5 times, there's one left.

5

4

What are you doing?

Me, you mean?

I'm telling the office I'll be late.

Gather all the phones.

Sure.

Alright, guys, you heard the lady.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Aren't you a bit overzealous?

I'm responsible for the dining room.

No one dies on my watch.

Fk, I left my phone on the table.

Great.

It's running out of power.

Call your friend in the police.

Hurry, come on.

Yeah.

It's me, we have a girl with a gun.

She's keeping us hostages.

Please come rescue us.

That's serious.

I'm calling a SWAT team

and the Green Brets.

Get ready, we're gonna

blow the whole place.

What?

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