Arlo: The Burping Pig Page #2

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All the girls are doing it.

It's like Susie

and Robin, Becky and me.

- Who are these people?

- Uh, they go to my school.

And they're also on

the cheerleading team.

- They're super cool.

- Well, wait, wait.

How do you even know them?

We just moved here.

Facebook.

So can I go?

I'll see, it'd be nice

to meet their parents.

I don't know anybody.

Yeah, but think about

all the new friends

you're gonna get to meet.

But they probably already

have their own friends.

Oh, you can never

have too many friends.

Now hurry up and eat,

so you can get dressed!

But they probably already

have their own friends.

Be nice.

[bell ringing]

[female teacher] Well, all of us

are reading Charlotte's Web.

And the main character,

as you know, is a spider.

Now how many of you

are scared of spiders?

No one is scared of...

I am petrified of spiders.

If Charlotte came in the room,

I'd be standing on a chair.

Excuse us?

Is this room 418, Ms. Pritchett?

Who wants to know?

We're the Roses.

We're new in town.

I'm Ilana. And of course this

is Talia, it's her first day.

- Hi.

- Hi Miss Talia Rose.

- Well, come on in.

- It's okay, sweetie.

- Go ahead.

- Take a seat right over there.

Go ahead.

Now class,

I'd like you to help me

say good morning to Miss Talia.

You ready?

[all]

Good morning, Talia.

Very nice, very nice.

Uh, Mrs. Rose, if there's

nothing else I can do for you,

I'd like to wish you a good day.

Oh, uh...

And one more thing, my class

starts promptly at 9:00 am,

and tardiness will

not be tolerated.

Yes, ma'am.

Bye.

[screams]

[groans]

Sold!

Who is gonna buy

this turd ranch?

[banging]

[groans]

We are reading

Charlotte's Web, Talia.

And, uh, well, Miss Sophia,

why don't you tell us a

little bit about what we know.

Well, the animals,

they all can talk.

That's right.

But animals can't really talk.

My cousin has a dog,

Tillie, who could talk.

- No way!

- Well, not talk, talk.

I mean, Tillie always knew

what you were saying, though.

Like if you ask her to play

ball she goes, "Bark, bark,"

and goes crazy.

That's not the same

thing as talking.

- Well, it kinda is.

- Well, what do you mean?

If a dog wags its tail,

it's probably happy.

Well, that's right. Animals

communicate with us all the time.

They tell us when

they're happy, or sad,

or serious, or angry.

Just like people.

That's very good.

You're a teacher's pet.

Me? I just got here.

I don't like teacher's pets.

Psst. That's Bertha.

She's a bully.

You know, these things

work a lot better

if you actually swing on them.

I don't feel like swinging.

Mm.

First day didn't go so hot?

[sighs]

I miss my old school.

Mm.

Beginnings are tough.

But you know, I think when you

meet that special somebody,

things are gonna

look a lot brighter.

- Maybe.

- Trust me.

Come on, come inside.

You can help me make dinner.

- Okay.

- Okay, see you in there.

Okay.

[leaves rustling]

- Well, hello, down there!

- Well, hello, up there!

Wait, what are you doing?

Hey!

Oh, this feels pretty good.

Talia, are you coming?

Coming, Mom!

Okay.

[pig squealing]

Okay, little piggy.

I have to go.

You stay right here,

you promise?

Nope, not moving.

Just leave the cookie.

You made mac and cheese!

I love mac and cheese!

Well, somebody's

in better spirits.

Can't forget my vegetables.

You feeling okay, Talia?

Yeah, sure, Mom.

Why?

Just wondering.

[sniffing]

I smell bacon.

- [dog barking]

- [Talia gasping]

- What's that?

- Oh, that's just Buster,

Mr. Unger's dog from next door.

I met them today.

Why is he barking?

Maybe he just wants to say hi.

[pig] Hey, get me outta here!

Hey, take it easy!

I'm new in the area!

- Maybe he's an attack dog.

- Oh, don't be silly.

He's just a harmless fur-ball.

[dog barking]

Feisty, but harmless.

What, where are you going?

I just remembered, I forgot

something out by the swing set.

Okay.

Buster! Shoo!

Shoo, shoo, Buster!

Bad dog, go away!

Shoo! Shoo, shoo!

Yeah, keep walking, Buster!

That's what I thought!

Thank goodness you're back.

That dog is cuckoo!

[pig squealing]

Are you okay little piggy?

I gotta get you inside

without Mom seeing.

Ahh...

Talia?

Yes?

Okay, who turned out the lights?

Everything okay out here?

Yeah, Mom, why?

Mm, love me some vegetables.

[laughing]

- What's so funny?

- Nothing.

Well then, why are you laughing?

Oh, I just remembered

that joke you told me

about the chicken

crossing the road.

It was so funny!

- Nice cover-up.

- Really?

Cause you told me

it was totally lame.

- I just didn't get it before.

- Okay.

- Come back in.

- Okay, Mommy, I'm coming.

Aren't you gonna

finish your dinner?

Mom, I'm stuffed.

You barely ate anything.

[pig burps]

That was a good one.

What do you say, Talia Rose?

- Excuse me.

- Excuse me.

I guess you ate

more than I thought.

I gotta go to my room

to do some homework.

Okay.

- Hey, squirt.

- Hey, Talia.

Hey, guys.

Why are you standing so funny?

- No reason.

- [pig burps]

- Ew, gross.

- Talia!

Sorry!

[breathing heavy]

[sighs]

[humming]

Hey, nice place you got here.

I think you ate too many

vegetables, little piggy.

- It gave you the burpies.

- [pig burps]

Hmm, what do pigs like to eat?

I should check.

I can save you some time.

Absolutely everything!

Oh, good, little piggy!

I can get you all this stuff.

Jackpot!

Wow, it says here, little piggy,

you can't ever eat chocolate.

- What's chocolate?

- Remember that, little piggy.

Sorry, no chocolate for you.

Chocolate could get you

really, really sick.

- You're the boss.

- You're so cute!

I have to think

of a name for you.

Hmm, maybe Phil.

Nah.

What else you got?

- Or maybe Peanut. No.

- [pig] No.

- Or maybe Roy.

- Do I look like a Roy to you?

Now where are those vegetables?

[gasps]

I got it! Arlo!

I think you look like an Arlo.

What do you think, little piggy?

[Arlo burps]

I'll take that as a yes.

Arlo. Yeah, Arlo. I like it!

Has a nice ring to it.

Well, I can't put you back outside with that

mean Buster barking at you all the time.

[knocking]

Everything okay in there?

Yeah, sure, Mom! Why?

Arlo, now stay

here and be quiet.

It's my mom. We can't let

anyone know you're in here.

Talia?

Everything okay in here, honey?

Yeah, sure, Mom. Why?

Who are you talking to?

Just myself.

- Yourself.

- Yeah, you know.

Hey, Talia, how's it going?

I'm doing great.

How about you?

I'm fine.

Hope it doesn't rain tomorrow.

You know, stuff like that.

Right.

Anyway, Mom, I'm tired.

I'm going to bed, okay?

It's 7:
30.

[sighs] I know, I'm just bushed.

Okay, pumpkin.

Get some sleep.

Okay, Mommy, good night.

[Ilana] Good night.

[Talia yawns]

[sighs]

[radio jingle]

[man on radio] And our

top story of the night.

The famous Ming dynasty vase

is lifted from City Hall.

Here's Mayor Cromwell with

the official statement.

[Cromwell]

Our town is very proud

to have been selected

as a stopping point

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