Army of Darkness Page #3

Synopsis: Ash is transported with his car to 1,300 A.D., where he is captured by Lord Arthur and turned slave with Duke Henry the Red and a couple of his men. When Ash is thrown into a pit, he defeats two monsters and wins respect of Arthur's army and vassals. The Wiseman points Ash as The Chosen One that will retrieve the Necronomicon but Ash is only interested in returning home. When he learns that the only way to return to his time is using the Necronomicon, Ash decides to travel to the unholy land of the Deadites. The Wiseman advises that he must say the words "Klaatu Barada Nikto" to safely get the evil book. However, Ash forgets the last word and an army of the dead resurrects to attack Arthur fortress and recover the Necronomicon. The battle between the living and the dead is about to start and the support of Henry the Red is the only way to help Ash and Arthur to defeat the army of darkness.
Genre: Comedy, Horror
Director(s): Sam Raimi
Production: Universal Pictures
  10 wins & 7 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.6
Metacritic:
57
Rotten Tomatoes:
72%
R
Year:
1992
81 min
1,934 Views


girly-girl. Move!

Have you lost your bones,

you decomposed gobs?

Get thee hence!

(SCREAMING)

A scout approaches!

Whoa!

Hey, get his horse.

Arise.

My lord, an army of the dead

gather in the wilderness.

They approach the castle.

How far from here?

But two days' ride.

These winged ones

are only the first of them.

Perhaps we should leave

as soon as possible.

We could be safe

in the mountains.

Yes, the mountains.

We must flee!

It is written.

It has been foretold.

They'll take our souls.

I'm afraid!

They'll swallow our souls.

I don't want to die!

(GUNSHOT)

That's it.

Go ahead and run.

Run home and cry to mama!

Me?

I'm through runnin'!

I say we stay here

and fight it out.

Are all men from the future

loudmouthed braggarts?

Nope.

Just me, baby. Just me.

How will we fight an army

of the dead

at our castle walls?

How will you fight that?

More words?

Most of our people

have already fled.

We are but 0 men.

Then we'll get Henry the Red

and his men to fight with us.

Now,

who's with me?

I'll stand by ya.

You can count on my steel.

SOLDIER:

I'll offer up my courage.

Me sword's by his side.

SOLDIER 2:
I'm with you!

I'll bend my bow

to your will, sir.

SOLDIER 3:
And mine!

(ALL SHOUTING)

SOLDIER 4:
We'll stay!

ALL:
Hail! Hail!

Hail! Hail!

Hail!

Hail!

Hail!

Well, my dear,

say hello to the boys.

(MEN MURMURING)

MAN:
There's a sight

for sore bones.

I may be bad,

but I feel...good.

Who rules?

MAN:
To you, my lord.

MAN 2:
You, sir.

MAN 3:
To the castle.

ALL:
The castle!

Hurry up now.

The castle! Let's push.

MAN:
Heave-ho.

MAN 2:
Good. Yeah.

(GRUNTING)

Yeah!

(HORSE WHINNYING)

MAN:
They're coming!

The Deadites approach!

(ALL SHOUTING)

ASH:

There's so damn many of 'em.

Maybe...

Just maybe my boys can stop

'em from gettin' the book.

Yeah.

And maybe I'm a Chinese

jet pilot.

(PLAYING FLUTE)

(BUGLE PLAYING)

Battle stations!

All right, get those rocks up,

mister, on the double!

Ready the catapults!

By God,

let's give 'em what for.

SOLDIER:
And halt!

SOLDIER 2:
Company, halt!

SOLDIER 3:
Company, halt!

I'll rip his balls off.

(HISSING)

Bring forth the scout!

Whoa.

My lord, we are positioned

on both fronts.

Fine, fine, fine. Where are

they keeping my book?

There, my lord,

beyond the wall.

The parapet. That would

be the most likely place.

Right.

Bring me forth

into that castle!

Forward!

SOLDIER:
Forward!

Cry havoc and let loose

the dogs of war!

To the castle!

SOLDIER:
Fly, mate! Fly!

SOLDIER 2:

Death to the mortals!

Arrows.

Torch boy!

Steady.

Fire!

Advance, you beasts, advance!

(SCREAMING)

(GRUNTING)

Yeah, baby!

All right!

Sire, there's a second

division approaching

from the south.

Ram the gates!

Catapults.

Catapults out!

Yeah!

Fire!

SOLDIER:
Look there!

Yeah!

SOLDIER:
Seek cover!

SOLDIER 2:
Watch out!

SOLDIER 3:
Make way!

Oh, you miserable

bags of bones!

Pick yourselves

up and sally fo...

Sally for...

Sally forth.

Come on,

you miserable wretches.

Lower.

Heave!

Forward!

Buttress the door, now!

Hold fast!

Back!

Stone these creatures!

Damn you!

That's got to hurt.

Go, you creatures! Arrows!

Load!

Fire!

Heave! Put your backbones

into it.

We've broken through!

The castle is ours!

(WHOOPING)

(LAUGHING)

Kill the mortals!

Get it achieved and fast!

SOLDIER:
Their ranks

are broken! Have at them!

(ALL GRUNTING)

Pull back! Man the parapet!

Protect the book.

God save us all.

Say hello to the 21st century.

Yeah!

Come on! I got plenty

for everybody!

Look out!

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

Bye-bye.

It's the one in the cart

we want! Get him!

Sheila?

(TIRES SCREECHING)

We've secured

the courtyard, my lord.

Excellent.

Oh! Hey! Look out!

Hey, you're mine, sweetie.

Get off of her!

Gotcha!

SOLDIER:
Damn you!

My lord.

Stay with the book.

The book's where we are.

The Red! The Red! Duke Henry

and his men have come!

(ALL SHOUTING)

Blows, blood

and death!

Duke Henry!

Die!

HENRY:

Onward, valiant cousins!

Their ranks are broke!

Oops!

Hello!

There you go.

The book is mine.

(LAUGHING)

I'll cut your gizzard out.

Hey, where'd he go?

Come to papa.

Get him!

Oh, you crazy b*tch,

get off of me!

Right.

You found me beautiful once.

Honey, you got real ugly.

There we are.

So you wanna play rough, eh?

Okay.

Oh.

All right, all right.

Prepare to die!

You're going down!

I'm going up.

I'm coming for you.

Come on!

Oops. Excuse me.

Come on.

All right!

You're pissing me off,

you ugly son of a b*tch!

I'll spoil those good looks.

Back-stabber!

Hold still!

Tallyho!

(SCREAMING)

(CACKLING)

We can't hold the battlements!

We will hold!

We must protect the book!

(GROWLING)

I got a bone to pick with you.

Come on.

Slice that gizzard open.

Now you're mine.

(EXCLAIMING)

(SCREAMING)

At last, the book.

I possess the Necronomicon.

I've crushed

your pathetic army.

Now I'll have my vengeance.

Buckle up, bonehead, 'cause

you're goin' for a ride.

Huh?

(SCREAMING)

SOLDIER:
Victory's ours!

(ALL CHEERING)

Retreat! Retreat!

Let's get the hell

out of here!

HENRY:
Tricky ones, they are.

MAN:

If it's a fight you want...

ARTHUR:
Watch 'em, lads.

They're an untrustworthy lot.

(SWORDS SWISHING)

Move yourself, lad!

Your hand, man.

Hey, Henry.

Godspeed!

Yeah, nice going.

My lady.

Arthur.

Well won, my friend.

We've won the day.

Yeah!

Yeah!

We're brothers and a new

kingdom shall be born!

The book tells us that

once you drink this liquid

and recite the words,

"KIaatu barada nikto,"

thou shalt awaken

in thine own time.

Remember, you must

recite the words exactly.

I thought about staying.

They offered me

the chance to lead them,

to teach them, to be king.

Ah-ha.

But my place is here.

So I swallowed the juice,

said the words and here I am.

Did you say the words

right this time?

Well, maybe

I didn't say every single,

tiny little syllable, no,

but basically

I said 'em, yeah.

Basically.

You know that story about

how you could've been king?

I think it's kind of cute.

Yeah.

(SCREAMING)

Die!

Lady, I'm afraid

I'm gonna have to

ask you to leave the store.

Who the hell are you?

Name's Ash.

Housewares.

I'll swallow your soul.

Come get some.

ASH:
Sure, I couId've

stayed in the past.

CouId've even been king.

But in my own way,

I am king.

Hail to the king, baby.

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Sam Raimi

Samuel M "Sam" Raimi is an American film director, producer, screenwriter and actor, famous for creating the cult horror Evil Dead series, as well as directing the original Spider-Man trilogy and the 1990 superhero film Darkman. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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