As Young as You Feel Page #5

business, you're too busy.

But it's true, Mr. McKinley. As a rule,

I never mix business and pleasure.

I only thought Mr. Gallagher and I could

take some office burdens off your shoulders.

Office burdens?

Well, that's a new one.

And another thing, since when do you have

to dress up like that for a business conference?

Okay. Tell Gallagher I'll take up this matter

with him in the morning.

Good night.

You two must have closed up the joint.

By George, you're really

a good-looking woman, Lucille.

And did he go for you!

Couldn't take his eyes off you.

What did you do after I left?

Louis, I want a divorce.

What?

Do you love me, Louis?

What the devil has that got to do with it?

Answer me. Do you?

Well, how do you like that?

She meets a guy one night, and right away

she starts yapping about do I love her?

What's the matter? Isn't my money

good enough for you anymore?

Haven't I supported you in the style

to which you're accustomed?

And your whole family too, for 20 years.

You don't understand.

You've never understood.

Oh, yes, I do.

I understand, all right.

It's you that's cockeyed.

But you're not gonna get away with it.

You might as well get any tomfool

ideas about divorce out of your head.

Please, let's don't argue about it.

We've been married 20 years.

Sounds kind of silly to be talking this way

after 20 years, doesn't it?

I'm sorry it's turned out so badly,

but I've been so miserable.

Not so fast. I want to know

what happened tonight.

- I told you, nothing happened.

- Don't give me that. What happened?

It's just that tonight,

for the first time in years...

I've known what it's like

to be admired and respected...

to be treated the way

a woman wants to be treated.

I know you think it's silly, but it's true.

Just once more before I turn the corner...

I want to know what love is.

Well, that's just great.

That's just wonderful.

You know a man 20 minutes,

and it's love in bloom.

Oh, I realize I'll probably

never see him again...

but I can go on the rest of my life...

just dreaming about tonight.

Well, how do you like that?

We've been married 20 years,

and now you're in love!

[Groans]

Ooh, that looks nice.

Only $20 down.

Yeah, but with the present credit system

in this country, controls and all...

- Joe, we're talking about a bedroom suite.

- [Door Opens]

My, my! Up so late?

The prexy of C. M!

- So I'm crazy, am I? I'm drunk? Look at him.

- Grandpa, your beard!

- Dad!

- Mr. Hodges, before you say

a word, do me a favor...

I'll handle this.

Dad, what have you done to yourself?

You stay out of this!

I want to get this matter settled first.

Once and for all, are you or are you not

the president of Consolidated Motors?

My boy, you've no idea what I am.

There. There! You see? I told you so,

but nobody'd believe me! Oh, no!

- But why, Grandpa? Why did you do it?

- I wanted my job back.

And just for that, you pretend you're

president of Consolidated Motors?

I didn't count on its getting

so involved, Della.

I thought I'd just establish a new

hiring policy and then come home.

You didn't count on its getting so involved?

Boy, that's a good one!

- Get a load of this.

- Oh, an atrocious picture.

You'd think that with all

the photographers in this town,

one would've gotten me in focus.

I give up. Honestly, I give up.

My own father!

Pardon me for asking, Grandpa,

but what happens tomorrow...

when the real president of Consolidated

Motors finds out he made a speech today?

I'm sure I don't know, Della, but I must

say it reads like a very good speech.

I'll tell you what's going to happen.

This is what's called confidence work,

like selling phony stock.

- You can get five years in jail

for this sort of thing.

- Really? So much?

I give them 24 hours

before they put you in jail.

Unless, of course, you turn yourself in.

That way, they might be more lenient.

I was in a show once where this

fellow pretends he's somebody else.

[Chuckles]

Oh, boy, what they did to him!

Holy smoke! I just thought

of something. That jerk Erickson.

I told him about it, and he's

the sort that'll turn you in...

'cause he knows he'll probably

get a promotion for it.

Just my luck. He turns you in, and they

make him assistant head of personnel.

- You sure about that?

- He'd turn his own mother in

to get that promotion.

Then why don't you turn him in? Why

should that other jerk get all the credit?

- I couldn't do that!

- Oh, don't be so noble all of a sudden.

- You want to marry Alice, don't you?

- Well, yes, but...

- And you can't or you won't

till you get that promotion.

- No, but that's...

No buts about it.

This is your big chance.

I can't do a thing like that, Mrs. Hodges.

If it weren't for him,

I'd never have known Alice.

- Somebody's gonna turn him in.

- Not me.

Grandpa, will you tell rover boy here...

that he ain't puttin'you behind

the eight ball ifhe turns you in.

Joe's of age.

He can make his own decision.

I've already made my decision.

- I'm not gonna do it.

- Well, for goodness' sake, why not?

You've all accused me of being just a man

of facts and figures and economics.

You're wrong. I'm also a man

of heart and blood and soul.

And I'm not gonna do it.

I've got principles.

- Joe.

- [Door Slams]

Well, how do you like that?

After all the time he spent

hanging around this house...

- all of a sudden he's got principles.

- Good night, all.

You're really a wonderful person, Joe.

Oh, she was nuts,

even if she is your mother.

In this awful world, where everybody's

cutting everybody else's throat...

you still have some decency left.

I'm proud of you, Joe.

You have real dignity.

Yeah?

I love you, Joe.

## [Humming Rumba]

[Knocking]

Come in.

- Grandpa, I just made a wonderful discovery.

- Really?

- I just realized that you're a great man.

- [Laughs]

I guess I'm beginning to grow up

at last, Grandpa... to understand things.

What kind of things, my dear?

Dignity. That's the word... dignity.

All of a sudden it came to me,

like a flash of lightning...

that there's nothing so important

as a person's own dignity.

It's more important than maintaining

a high standard of living...

or even being assistant to the head

of some old department.

And that's what this

was all about, wasn't it?

You were fighting for your dignity,

the dignity of your work.

And for that, you were willing to

take on the whole complex world.

I think you're a wonderful man, Grandpa.

Thank you, my dear. Good night.

Good night.

[Door Opens, Closes]

[Sighs]

[Sputtering] Egads!

[Man On Radio] In our time, we have

grown accustomed to the machine age.

Mr. Cleveland's fine speech has given us

a new realization ofhonor and humanity...

as well as a truer understanding of the

individual's place in our American culture.

Our hat is off to Mr. Cleveland.

He is a great American.

- Read what that paper there

has to say, Mr. Cleveland?

- Not yet.

It says, "God bless Mr. Cleveland

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