Ashby Page #4

that you did not know you had.

And you will fly.

You will feel a spirit inside of you,

that you did not know you possessed.

- And you will fly.

- On wings.

And you will see a glow,

descend on the field.

And in that glow, will be the

spirits of these boys, of these men.

And they will carry you, if you have

the courage and the heart to be carried.

And if you do not,

woe be on you.

For if you are a cockroach at heart,

if you are a piece of chewable candy,

then this game will spit you out.

The chewable, rancid nothing

that you are.

And this team will cast you out

into your own dark nothingness.

Now, when you go out into that field,

I want you to remember three things.

One.

Be prepared to die.

Two. Be prepared to feel

a spirit inside of you, carrying you.

And three,

wear clean cleats.

I can't stand dirty cleats.

- What do we perform?

- Deeds, not words.

- What do we have?

- Wings!

- Who called us to this?

- God did.

- Will we fail him?

- No, sir.

Deeds! Wings! God!

Deeds! Wings! God!

- Come on!

- Deeds! Wings! God!

- Deeds! Wings! God!

- Yeah!

- Deeds! Wings! God!

- Yeah.

- Deeds! Wings! God!

- Yeah!

- Deeds! Wings! God!

- Yeah!

Deeds! Wings! God!

Hey, Dad. I'm just...

Oh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no.

Yeah, I figured you weren't...

I figured.

All right.

All right. You too, man. You too.

Bye.

Sorry. I'm sorry.

We must ask ourselves,

"What can I do...?"

So, Dad's so right about it.

I can't be trying to do this for him.

You know, I gotta just be doing it

for myself.

I can't have you two being you two.

Focus is important.

It's such a big day for me.

I just gotta focus.

Gotta get my mind on it.

I probably should eat some carbs.

Do I have time?

No, I don't have time. I'll be late.

All right.

All right. Love you, Mom.

Bye, bye, bye.

- Hey, football guy!

- Hey.

Good luck.

- Hey.

- Hi!

Thought I might come along.

That'd be great.

Yeah, his dad...

That'd be great.

Welcome to Rhodes Stadium.

And so begins another season in

the hallowed history of VARGA football.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

please give a warm welcome to your

Varga Sabres.

Ten, hut!

Boy can run.

Yeah. Well, he was chased a lot

when he was young.

- Get here. Get here.

- Hey!

Stay inbounds.

Bet you were, too.

I was.

That's changed now.

Well, when you're my age,

you have to be more proactive.

That is shittier than sh*t itself.

Don't look at me.

Catch the ball, take the hit.

Do you date, Ashby?

I tried it once or twice

after my wife died.

But everyone's so desperate

and filled with need,

I felt...

I just felt like

I was being sucked into a black hole.

Yeah.

Score is tied. Last play of the game.

Let's go guys. Let's go out there.

Let's take it all home.

Can you catch this one, 27?

- Can you catch this one?

- I hope so.

Are you frickin' kidding me?

On three. One, two, three!

Down!

Set, hike.

You were amazing!

You were so great!

I'm sorry, I can't stop crying.

He came out of my vagina.

And now he's this, like man

with wings on his feet.

Did it really seem like I had

wings on my feet?

- Yes!

- Oh, my God!

- Hail. O conquering hero.

- Hey.

You were, dare I use a term stripped

of its meaning, awesome.

You must be, mother of the prodigy.

- I am.

- I'm Eloise.

I'm June. You're as cute as a bucket of

kittens. I'm gonna eat you.

Not really my intention, but thank you.

Hey, Ashby, I didn't...

I didn't know you were coming.

I'm a very enigmatic person.

That's true.

- Good game.

- Thanks.

I'm taking us to dinner.

I feel so drunk with excitement,

I want to take...

Sorry, ladies, sorry.

But we've got to kidnap him.

Team party slash meetings

slash, eh, poetry reading.

- You want to come?

- No.

Are you sure?

Bye.

Sh*t.

Hi Dad. I got your gift.

I'm gonna drink 'em all.

Yeah. I got 'em.

Thank you. Yes, so sweet.

Yeah, totally.

I was definitely able to focus

'cause there were no distractions.

Oh!

Really?

The Sacred Heart game?

Yeah, that would be awesome.

Okay.

Talk to you later, Dad. Bye.

Hey Mom.

Dad's coming to Sacred Heart game.

That's great, sweetie.

Mom, look at me.

So fast.

Bye.

You can totally have one.

I've got like 96 bottles.

I'm good.

I'm excited for you to meet my dad.

- It'd be awesome.

- Yeah.

I'm going to tell you something,

and you're not going to take it very well.

You gonna know it's the truth

because I know you are

really a bright boy and...

But you don't want it to be.

So you'll...

Wriggle your ass around it and

try to dive underneath it and everything,

but, you gotta face the fact that

your old man is just a piece of sh*t.

No. I know it's easy to take

a dim view of his actions,

and his occasional letting me down.

But he's just a man.

He's trying to make a new family.

That's difficult to do. And I'm a pretty

resilient and understanding person.

So, I get it.

Don't rationalize being a victim.

You used to be quite silent on our

drives. I preferred that.

Means I could project the idea you

were a nice person onto you.

Like how you project onto your daddy?

Let me tell you something, son.

You need to recognize a garbage can

when you see one.

I'm starting to.

And you need to take care of your mom.

You need to take responsibility.

Be a man. Let's go downtown.

You know, I had this dream last night,

that eh,

I had swallowed a toothpick.

Why the f*** would I swallow

a toothpick.

That's something that I would never do.

Swallow a toothpick.

Sh*t, kid.

I'm just going to be a minute.

I'm not your butler.

I'm not your car butler.

What?

You don't know him, okay.

And you don't know me.

- How dare you?

- Can we talk about this later?

As if you didn't let your family down.

Okay, I know about your daughter.

Yeah. That shut you up, huh?

I do my research, I ask neighbors.

And apparently, no,

she didn't have cancer.

She OD'd.

And where were you, motherf***er?

Were you off killing some

South American dictator or something?

I'm outta here.

Hey.

I watched the tape of the game.

- My man.

- Yo, Smits!

You run the line of least resistance.

That's kind of the point, right?

You never get hit.

Yeah, that's also the point.

It can't last. Just an observation.

So, how was it?

How was what?

Your sexcapade with Betty Danger.

Betty Danger?

How perfect!

You don't even know her name.

I knew it was Betty, I just didn't know

it was Danger.

No, it's not. They just call her that.

Why?

Because she has VD.

Not true.

Look, I may be jealous,

even though we're not courting.

Look. I was really, really drunk and...

I mean...

We're not going out, technically.

Yeah, I know that. Thank you.

Whatever. To the victor goes

the spoiled blondes.

Eloise...

I like you.

What an utterly shitty thing to say.

Sorry.

- Hey, Mom.

- Hey, baby.

- You okay?

- Yeah.

Yeah. I...

Got stood up.

I sat there at the restaurant like a...

I don't know.

A homeless guy tried to pick me up

on the way home.

So, that was great,

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