At War with the Army Page #5

Synopsis: Alvin Corwin is low man on the totem pole, and goes from one mishap to another at an army training camp in World War II.
Genre: Comedy, Musical, War
Director(s): Hal Walker
Production: American Pop Classics
 
IMDB:
5.8
NOT RATED
Year:
1950
93 min
Website
254 Views


Are you going to make this your life's work?

What do you want ? Why don't you worry what

you doing and I'll worry about what I'm doing...

I never made this stuff before in my life.

When those guys are ready, I'll give it my all.

Worry about your doing, I'll worry about I'm

doing, I've never done anything this before in life.

Good boy Corwin, good boy. Now

let's got down to the dispensary.

The what, the where?

little old dispensary. We're going to take little

old arm, we're going to roll up little old sleeve...

then we'll get the little old needle

and give you a little old shot...

and it aint' going to hurt a little old

bit. Come on.

- You sure it ain't going to hurt?

- No it won't hurt you a bit. Come on.

Good boy, go ahead.

Believe me, you won't even feel the little old

needle.

I won't feel the little old needle?

- Noooo, won't even hurt you a little bit?

- Won't even hurt me a little bit?

Noooo.

- Is it a square needle?

- Round needle.

Next.

Corwin!

Now just relax.

Roll up your sleeve.

Think of something pleasant.

You're eating ice-cream.

You're dancing with a beautiful,

beautiful girl.

You're sleeping in a white dreamy bed.

I didn't bet to the last part.

Now that didn't hurt a bit, did it?

How do you feel?

Feel good? Okay. Come on, let's

go.

Corwin!

- Does this finish up your maleria shots?

- Yes Corporal.

- And me too.

- Here take this note into the mess sergeant.

How do you feel?

- You said it wouldn't hurt me.

- You'll live.

That's what I'm afraid of.

- Good-morning Corporal.

- Good-morning Captain.

As you were.

Puccinelli, I talked to Colonel Davies and he

is going to put you on that overseas movement.

That's swell Captain.

Coporal Clark tell you about the

army woman that was in army room yesterday?

Yes sir.

She's having trouble locating some

man in the company.

And I want you to find the man.

Yes sir. I'll try, but it won't be easy.

She could make things nasty, if she

got to the Colonel.

- Will you take care of it?

- I'll do my best sir.

Good! As soon as you find the

man, I want to see him.

Yes sir.

How do you like that? Now I'm in

charge of domestic relations.

Even that little old alert gag I pulled

on Millie just to kiss her a few times...

Hey douse them lights. The

Colonel is coming by.

Sarg Puccinelli, I'd like to see your

copy of the master training schedule

It's supposed to be posted

on the bulletin board Yes Sir

Clark, show the Colonel

how we posted the schedule

- It's here sir.

- I can't see it.

It's, it's......I'm sure I put it here

Well it doesn't seem to be here now.

I think it's in the other room Colonel.

- What was that?

- I think it's in the other room.

Colonel.

-Good-morning Colonel.

- Good-morning Caldwell

We can't seem to find a copy of that

master training schedule.

It should be posted in every orderly

room.

It's probably there sir.

- No it isn't on that board.

- I can't understand why it isn't up.

Here it is.

I hope it looks better than your

orderly room.

Sergeant Puccinelli.

Open that door!

I hope someday to see a copy of

that master training schedule.

We found it sir. It was posted under SOP.

Ah yes. Well no wonder I didn't see

it. It's too dark in here.

Turn on those lights.

Here's the envelope from ltalian.

- So you're really going to ship me out?

- That's right.

Well "Cutie". I had a nice little talk

last night with Millie and...

And?

And I'll give you the rest of the day

to get my name off that list.

Don't threaten me. Out!

Wait a minute.

It's a pleasure.

Here's a telegram for Corwin. Give

it to him in the messhall.

Sergeant Puccinelli.

Colonel Davies is going to inspect

the supply room.

-And following that, the messhall.

-Yes sir.

- Miller!

- Yeah?

- The Colonel is going to inspect in

a minute. - Oh no Serg!

Ditch this for me.

Where am I going to hide this? A

long one for Louie.

It's all right. We're part of the

charges.

Captain, what's gotten into this

company?

- Well a few things have gone wrong sir.

-A few things?

Captain I have never....

- What was that?

- Sounds like the messhall.

Messhall?

- Signal's over.

- What's the meaning of this?

Sergeant Puccinelli, what's going

on here?

What's that whistle? Is there a fire?

What is it?

It's a baby. Vic look! It's a little

baby!

Look when we first married, we

didn't think we'd have any, then...

we got a little....COLONEL!

Colonel said this is the most

outrageous company he's ever seen.

He's cancelled you off that shipping

order.

- You mean I can't go overseas?

- That's right.

Here it is in writing.

I'm sorry sir. Yes sir.

How do you like that?

Five years in this man's army. Five

years and the day before I go on shipping...

I get caught in this filthy machinary.

What's the first class this

afternoon? Calisthenics.

Of fine, that's all I need. There's got

to be an easier way to make a living.

I'm afraid this little number will keep

us busy for a week.

- Oh good-afternoon Mrs. Caldwell.

- Good-afternoon.

How soon will you be ready?

Well, well, well. All dressed up to

go places, I see.

I'm afraid for once in my life, I have

a surprise for you.

Really?

It seems without consulting you..

the Colonel has given B-company officers a special

problem which will undoubtly take all night to do.

What kind of problem?

We have to identify a number of

South Pacific islands by their topography.

- Sally said you wouldn't get that till

tomorrow.

Then you must have done something to anger

Sally, because she gave it to us today.

Well I'll tell her a thing or two..

I might have come out without the

answers.

The answers?

I've got them right here,

some place.

Here you are.

Munich, Straussberg, these aren't

the answers.

Oh, that's C-company.

Here's yours.

Ero, colsoe, Dagora......

If I thought there was another

woman like Dorthy on this earth...

..I'd tell you to get married at once.

I'm certainly glad you appreciate me.

Well, I've got a few things to pick up at the PX. And

I'll be back to pick you up in exactly 20 minutes.

I'd better give this to Captain

Conner in C-company.

At ease men.

- That Mc Vie. He wants another good-conduct ribbon.

- How does he lose so many?

I don't know . He gets plastered and

deal them out like fraternity pins.

Hey, the Colonel is checking

calisthenics.

- I beg your pardon sir.

- Yes, what is it?

Colonel is checking orderly rooms...

- Sergeant Miller on duty sir.

- Where is Segeant Puccinelli?

With the company, taking calisthenics

sir. Shall I get him for you sir?

No.

No, the exercise will be good for him.

Yes sir.

- Miller. ..

- Yes sir?

At ease. What's the name of that

Sergeant, the one with the whistle?

Oh you mean Mc Vie sir.

I want you find Mc Vie immediately. Tell him to get

entire outfit on obstacle course in 10 min.

Yes sir!

Hey Corwin.

Come on let's go. Head's down.

Come on you guys, keep it moving.

I want to hear them helmets. Keep moving.

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James B. Allardice

James B. Allardice (March 20, 1919, Canton, Ohio — February 15, 1966) was a prominent American television comedy writer of the 1950s and 1960s. During World War II he served in the US Army where he wrote the play At War with the Army. Following the war, Allardice attended Yale University where his play was later on Broadway in 1949 and filmed in the same year with Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. Allardice is best known for his collaborations with writing partner Tom Adair on a number of highly successful American 1960s TV sitcoms including The Munsters, F Troop, My Three Sons, Gomer Pyle, USMC and Hogan's Heroes. Allardice won an Emmy in 1955 for best comedy writing for his work on "The George Gobel Show". He contributed to Alfred Hitchcock Presents, and wrote Hitchcock's "lead-ins" for all of the 359 episodes of the series, as well as many speeches for Hitchcock's public engagements. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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