Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery Page #2

The both laugh.

FULL SCREEN INSERT - AUSTIN'S PASSPORT

The passport opens. We see Austin's dour photo. Then he gives

an insane grin, showing his bad teeth. The page flips and we

see visa stamps from all the exotic places he's been.

EXT. CARNABY STREET - DAY

Austin flips a coin into a BLIND MAN's cup. The blind man,

obviously sighted, moves the cup to catch the coin. Austin

wags his finger in a "oh, you" fashion, and then proceeds to

knee him the balls.

EXT. CARNABY STREET - DAY

Austin is being chased around the corner by a GAGGLE OF

SCHOOLGIRLS.

After a moment, Austin returns from around the corner with a

baton, followed by a MARCHING BAND.

The schoolgirls pick up his trail again and he begins to

run.

A 1967 Jaguar XKE convertible, which is decorated with a

large Union Jack, pulls beside Austin.

He jumps over the door into the moving convertible, racing

off just ahead of the crowd.

EXT./INT. JAGUAR - STREETS OF LONDON - DAY

The driver of the Jag is Austin's associate, MRS. KENSINGTON,

a beautiful woman in her thirties.

They drive against obvious REAR PROJECTION of 1960's London.

AUSTIN:

Hello, Mrs. Kensington.

MRS. KENSINGTON

Hello, Austin

Just then, a FLASHING RED LIGHT goes off and we hear a

distinctive PHONE RING.

MRS. KENSINGTON

That'll be Basil Exposition, Chief

of British Intelligence.

The glove compartment revolves to reveal a picture phone.

ANGLE ON:
PICTURE PHONE SCREEN. We see BASIL EXPOSITION a

distinguished older man. A desk plate reads: "Basil

Exposition, Chief of British Intelligence."

BASIL EXPOSITION

(on picture phone)

Hello, Austin. This is Basil

Exposition, Chief of British

Intelligence. You're Austin Powers,

International Man of Mystery, and

you're with Agent Mrs. Kensington.

The year is 1967, and you're talking

on a picture phone.

AUSTIN:

We know all that, Exposition.

BASIL EXPOSITION

I just wanted to be extremely clear

so that everyone knows what's going

on at any given time. We've just

received word that Dr. Evil, the

ultimate square, is planning to take

over the world.

AUSTIN:

Dr. Evil? I thought I put him in

jail for good.

BASIL EXPOSITION

I'm afraid not. Earlier this week,

Dr. Evil escaped from Zedel Edel

Prison in Baaden Baaden and now he's

planning a trap for you tonight at

the Electric Psychedelic Pussycat

Swinger's Club in Picadilly Circus

here in swinging London.

A panel revolves to reveal a map of London with lights showing

Austin's position and the location of the club.

AUSTIN:

Just where you'd never think to look

for him. We'll be there.

BASIL EXPOSITION

Good luck, Austin.

AUSTIN:

Thank you.

BASIL EXPOSITION

Oh, and Austin...

AUSTIN:

Yes?

BASIL EXPOSITION

(pause)

Be careful.

AUSTIN:

Thank you.

(to Mrs. Kensington)

Let's go, baby!

EXT. STOCK FOOTAGE - PICADILLY CIRCUS - NIGHT

On top of one building is a three-story high BOB'S BIG BOY

figure.

EXT. ELECTRIC PSYCHEDELIC PUSSYCAT SWINGER'S CLUB - NIGHT

The Jaguar pulls up in front of the swinging nightclub. Mrs.

Kensington steps out of the car, dressed in a tight leather

fightsuit. She looks fabulous.

INT. ELECTRIC PSYCHEDELIC PUSSYCAT SWINGER'S CLUB

It's a swinging club. FREAKS abound. In one corner, there is

a PRESS CONFERENCE in progress.

MICK JAGGER:

Hey Austin Powers, it's me, Mick

Jagger.

AUSTIN:

Hey, Mick!

MICK JAGGER:

Are you more satisfied now sexually,

Austin?

AUSTIN:

Well, you can't always get what you

want.

MICK JAGGER:

(thinking)

"You can't always get what you want!"

That's a great title for a song!

I'm gonna write that, and it'll be a

big hit.

AUSTIN:

Good on ya, man.

MICK JAGGER:

Groovy!

FULL SCREEN INSERT

A vinyl 45 of "You Can't Always Get What You Want."

FULL SCREEN INSERT - BILLBOARD CHART

"You Can't Always Get What You Want" at Number One.

INT. ELECTRIC PSYCHEDELIC PUSSYCAT SWINGER'S CLUB

In one corner ANDY WARHOL sits in front of his multi-colored

Elvis (or equivalent). He body paints a butterfly on the

thigh of a MOD GIRL wearing a metallic miniskirt outfit.

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