Batman: Assault on Arkham Page #2

Hoist a pint with us.

Can't, it's a school night.

Suit yourself. How about a

friendly game of darts, then?

Yeah!

Lucky shot!

Right, let's see you do it.

Yeah!

Sorry mate.

Looks like that one

took a bad bounce.

Ow!

Let's call it even. Mate.

Louise, it's Amanda,

I have a special

assignment for you.

Something I'd rather keep

between the two of us.

I'm listening.

Welcome back!

- Did you miss me?

- What do you want?

I got an itch I thought you

could help me scratch, cowboy.

Oh, good start!

Oh, what the hell?

Yahtzee!

Here's my stop.

Wish me luck, cowboy.

Yeah!

There's got to be

one here somewhere.

You know where he

put it, don't you?

Uh-oh.

Where is it, Harley?

No idea, what you're talking about.

Answers! Now!

Back off, bats.

Where is it?

What's he talking about?

Who knows what these wankers

get worked up about?

I don't know, I swear.

I'm not firing blind

against the bat.

Waller, what the devil is going on?

You don't get to call me up

and demand answers, Deadshot!

What are they talking about?

Joker stole a dirty bomb and

hid it somewhere in Gotham.

Apparently, it's large enough that the

radiation would kill half the population.

Batman's torn the city

apart trying to find it.

At one point he thought

riddler might know.

The joker has a dirty bomb?

That gives me the chills.

Ice puns? Really?

Waller, this is crap.

I don't care, convict.

Do your job!

Honestly, B man, I don't know where

Mr. J puts half of his stuff.

I just wanted a chatty boo-boo doll

before they went on sale tomorrow.

Get her back to Arkham!

Will do, Batman.

Get in there, you nutty broad.

I'm in the middle of lunch.

Now I've got to process this crazy dame?

Crazy, huh?

Why don't I just toss her in

her old cell, and come back.

Yeah, right. I've got like half

a dozen new forms to fill up

before you can even come in.

We got ten minutes

to plant the device.

Where should I dump her?

Put it through the X-ray machine.

Heh, don't get much

deader than that.

This one's cold as ice.

Hey buddy, I got nothing in the

system about accepting a new body.

Yeah! Ha-ha.

It says, "not found."

I came from inside.

Run it again.

Nah, something's wrong.

I'm gonna to have to get security.

Junction box is up ahead.

So move your ass.

Harley!

Is it really you?

Sh*t!

Don't screw this up.

Aren't you even going to say hello?

Oh, guys, you've got to see this.

Joker just spotted Harley!

Keep walking.

Tell him to shut up.

Aw, I can tell you're still sore.

At least the bruises

cleared up nicely.

What's your hurry, Harl?

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

Damn it!

Let's move.

Maybe, she'll kill him.

I'm going to kill you!

I'll kill him! I'll kill him

myself for what he's done to me!

Women! Am I right, officer?

Can't live with them, can't

kick them out of a moving car.

You know the rules, buddy,

I got to phone it in.

She's dead!

How much trouble could she be?

Nothing goes in or out of

Arkham without being okayed.

But...

Give me a sec, I'll try to get

a hold of the watch commander.

Run it again.

I tried twice, sir.

I can't lose this job because

your system is down.

Come on, you amateurs.

Sorry hon, bulletproof.

Even better, puddin'.

Why, Harley, if I didn't know better,

I'd say you're trying to kill me.

We're finished, you and me!

I got someone new

now, someone better!

Oh, hell!

This will have to do.

Never mind, just came through.

About time!

Sorry, it's an old system.

No problem.

Let's see what goodies we've got.

Oh, sh*t!

How the... ow!

Ahh! My goolies!

That's payback, you dumb ass.

Walk it off, captain kangaroo.

Come on, we're out of time.

New guy?

That's right! You're

not jealous, are you?

That's him!

I know you.

We worked together once.

No, wait, don't tell me,

don't tell me. Hmm.

Deadhead, hmm? Buckshot?

I got her!

You can have her!

Bet you buy your shirts

second hand too.

Sir, we've got an

explosion on level E.

He's still secure, sir.

Is that room service?

Tell them I never got my calzone.

Good! I need every available

security down in the kitchen.

Stat!

We're on yellow alert.

You're late!

Ran in to her ex. Grab hold!

Put your back into it.

Hey! Nobody's supposed

to be down there!

Ah, we just snuck down

here for a little party.

What kind of party?

Crap! You're Harley Quinn!

Don't move, you crazy b*tch.

Blech!

I hate Italian food.

Has that kitchen

fire been contained?

Yes, sir.

Get here!

- Lawton!

- What?

GPS has you in the

main security hub.

What's going on?

We own it, that's what.

Now we grab the cane.

Don't get to cocky, Lawton.

You're at the point of no return.

You best keep that in mind.

That gas explosion put the whole

bloody asylum on yellow alert.

If the security cameras

make us, we're toast.

So shut down all the security cams.

That's a sure fire way

to alert the bat.

What then? Let him watch

us run around like idiots?

Play yesterday's footage.

Aw, shark-wick had

his first thought.

Shut it, boomer! Say it again.

Play yesterday's footage

of the same time.

I can do that.

And we can operate

without eyes on us.

You mean Batman's or Waller's.

Both!

The intensive treatment

building is there,

just across the yard.

Let's move!

Low profile.

Frost, move your ass.

Top priority are those towers.

I can scale them.

No time.

You do two, I'll do two.

Fine!

On my mark.

Now!

You missed!

Wait for it.

Patrol, I need a sweep of the yard!

Boom! In your face!

He got to his walky!

I'd score that a miss,

you two-bit c-lister!

That's it!

U.S.A.! U.S.A.!

Boys, we got company!

Shark, no!

Finally, some action!

So much for low profile.

Status report.

I got you in the exercise yard, but

you don't show up on the cameras.

Must be something wrong

with the system. Damn it!

We're a little busy right now.

I'll call you back.

Don't yank me around, convict.

Get the cane, get out!

Yahtzee.

Victor Zsasz, we've

got you surrounded.

Please! Please, don't hurt me.

Let the girl go

before it gets ugly.

The zombie is mine to liberate.

I have righteous work to do.

I'm not in the mood tonight, Zsasz.

You seem troubled tonight, sir.

It's Harley, Alfred.

She was acting odd.

Odder than usual, you mean.

Like she was happy to get caught.

Maybe she missed her puddin'?

Maybe.

More likely it's linked

to the joker's bomb.

Arkham had a yellow

alert this evening.

Everything looks to be in place.

Hmm.

That's Mochel.

He doesn't work Friday's.

Neither does Ferrick.

That's the Thursday crew.

This isn't live. They're

broadcasting old footage.

Something's wrong at Arkham!

No! No!

Enough, shark, put him down!

Ow!

Ouch!

Do I have your attention now?

Don't break cover in the middle

of an operation, unless I say so.

Don't ever do that to me.

Or what? You'll chew my head off?

Do it! I'm begging you.

You think any of you have a shot

of getting out alive without me?

That's what I thought.

We're just lucky

this was contained.

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