Batman Returns Page #2

...if you forgot the Bruce Wayne file...

- You stupid corn dog!

Working late?

I'm just boning up for your Bruce Wayne

meeting in the morning.

I pulled all the files

on the proposed power plant...

...and Mr. Wayne's hoped-for investment.

I even opened the protected files...

How industrious!

How did you open the protected files?

May I ask?

I figured your password was "Geraldo,"

your Chihuahua, and it was.

This is all very interesting,

though a bit on the technical side...

...about how the power plant

is a power plant in name only...

...since, in fact, it's going to be a big,

giant...

...big, giant... capacitor.

And, instead of generating power,

it'll be sucking power from...

...Gotham City...

...and storing it...

...stockpiling it...

...which is a very novel approach, I'd say.

Who'd you say this to?

Nobody.

What did curiosity do to the cat?

I'm no cat.

I'm just an assistant.

A secretary.

And a very good one.

Too good?

Listen...

...it's our secret. Honest.

How can you be so mean

to someone so meaningless?

This power plant...

...is my legacy. It's what I leave behind.

For Chip.

Nothing must prevent that.

Go ahead. Intimidate me.

Bully me, if it makes you feel big.

It's not like you can kill me!

Actually, it's a lot like that.

For a second, you really frightened me.

Really?

Honey, I'm home!

Oh, I forgot. I'm not married.

Selina, this is your mother. Call me.

Selina, this is your mother.

Why haven't you called me back?

Hello, Selina Kyle.

We're just calling to make sure

you've tried Gotham Lady perfume.

One whiff of this and your boss

will ask you to stay after work...

...for a candlelight staff meeting for two.

Gotham Lady perfume.

Exclusively at Shreck's department store.

I don't know about you,

Miss Kitty, but I feel...

...so much yummier.

Ladies and gentlemen:

I stand before you again to denounce

the urban chaos we live with in our city.

It's got to stop.

It's going to stop!

Our community is coming apart...

...in a season when

it should be coming together.

I don't care what the cynics may say.

This is the Christmas season...

...and should be a healing time.

I say that not only as an official...

...but as a husband and a father.

Last night's violence won't happen again.

I'm not good at speeches,

so I'll just say, "Thanks. "

It's the hideous Penguin Man.

Take the baby. Just don't hurt me, please!

This was the remarkable scene

only minutes ago in Gotham Plaza.

The mysterious Penguin saving the life

of the mayor's baby...

...and announcing his presence.

- All I want in return...

...is a chance...

...to find my mom and dad.

A chance to find out who they are...

...and thusly...

...who I am.

And then...

...with my parents...

...try to understand... why.

Why they did what I guess

they felt they had to do...

...to a child...

...who was born...

...a little different.

A child...

...who spent his first Christmas...

...and many since...

...in a sewer.

Mr. Wayne? Something wrong?

His parents.

This scene, direct from Gotham Plaza.

I hope he finds them.

Here he is, standing alongside

Gotham's leading citizen, Max Shreck.

How about a statement?

People want to know.

- Penguin's not to be disturbed!

- It's a public place!

- Walk. Now. Move.

- Freedom of the press!

Wait a minute.

What about the freedom

to rediscover your roots...

...with dignity and privacy?

Is the Penguin a personal friend?

He's a personal friend of the whole city,

so have a heart.

Give the Constitution a rest.

It's Christmas.

"Red Triangle Circus put on

a swell show with fierce lions.

"Circus returns for a two-week...

"Kids will love..."

Thanks.

It's cold!

It's vichyssoise.

It's supposed to be cold.

"Circus is back with a freak show,

may not be suitable for kids...

"...featuring a poodle lady...

"...the world's fattest man...

"...and Aquatic Bird Boy."

Why are you determined to prove...

...that this Penguin is not what he seems?

Must you be the only lonely "man-beast"

in town?

"The circus folded its tents yesterday...

"...after reports of missing children

in several towns.

"Police have closed down

the Red Triangle fairgrounds.

"However, at least one

freak-show performer vanished before...

"...he could be questioned."

I suppose you feel better now.

No.

Actually, I feel worse.

Why're you still out?

Are you concerned about that strange,

heroic Penguin person?

I think he knows who his parents are.

There's something else.

Mr. Penguin...

A penguin is a bird that cannot fly!

I am a man!

I have a name!

Oswald Cobblepot!

You'll never be able to settle with them?

True.

I was their "Number-One" son...

...and they treated me like number two.

But it's human nature to fear...

...the unusual.

Perhaps...

...when I held my...

...Tiffany baby rattle...

...with a shiny flipper...

...instead of five chubby digits...

...they freaked.

But I forgive them.

"Penguin forgives parents!

'I'm at peace with myself and the world!

"'Don't need hands as long

as you got heart.

"'My heart is filled with love.

I feel five feet tall."'

- He's like a frog that became a prince.

- No, he's more like a penguin.

Now, now, pretty little thing.

Nice and easy.

I love a big, strong man who's not afraid

to show it with someone half his size.

Be gentle, it's my first time.

Tic-tac-toe.

You make it easy, don't you?

Always waiting for some Batman

to save you.

I am Catwoman...

...hear me roar.

I'd offer you coffee, but my assistant

is using her vacation time.

Good time. Everyone but the bandits'll

be slacking off till after the New Year.

I'm not sure I like the inference.

I didn't realize I made one.

I'm pushing this power plant now

because it'll cost more later.

A million saved is a million earned.

I commissioned this report.

Take a look at it.

Gotham City has a power surplus.

I'm sure you know that.

My question is:

What's your angle?

"Power surplus?" Bruce, shame on you!

No such thing. One can never have

too much power.

If my life has a meaning,

that's the meaning.

I'll fight you. I've already spoken

to the mayor and we agree.

Mayors come and go.

Blue bloods tire easily.

Can you go 15 rounds

with Muhammad Shreck?

I guess we'll find out.

Of course, I don't have a crime boss

like Cobblepot in my corner.

"Crime boss?" Shows what you know...

..."Mr. To-The-Manor-Born-

With-A-Silver-Spoon."

Oswald is Gotham's new golden boy.

If his parents hadn't 86'ed him,

you'd have been bunkies at prep school.

He controls the Red Triangle Gang.

I can't prove it yet, but we both...

I'll not stand for mud-slinging here.

If my assistant was here,

she'd have already escorted you out...

Anywhere he wants.

Preferably some nightspot grotto...

...or...

...secluded hideaway.

Nice suit.

That's my name, don't wear it out

or I'll make you buy me a new one.

This is Bruce...

...Wayne.

We've met.

Have we?

No, I'm sorry. I mistook me

for somebody else.

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