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Bean Page #17
- PG-13
- Year:
- 1997
- 89 min
- 859 Views
The bike sparks into life and does a wheelie before speeding out of the
drive and down the road. BEAN stands, hands on hips, looking very-
pleased with himself indeed.
DAVID:
To BEAN ) Right! Right! You get inside and look after Kevin! (not
such a good idea) Uh --- Right! Kevin. You get inside and look after
... uh... (that would be a worse idea) Right! Get in the car! Both of
you. Jesus!
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY. RECEPTION AREA - DAY
DAVID, BEAN and KEVIN at the reception desk.
ANNIE:
So, Kevin. How's it going?
KEVIN:
ANNIE smiles cutely at BEAN. DAVID is still rattled.
ANNIE:
Big day today, huh?
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DAVID:
Uh ... yes ...
DAVID looks askance at BEAN. BERNIE hurries up and takes DAVID to one
side.
BERNIE:
Great day. At last we can start getting out of debt and concentrating
on the future.
DAVID:
Yes, look, I wanted to talk to you about this. I'm sure we haven't
been doing as badly as all that.
BERNIE:
You're an innocent and an optimist David - that's why I love you. (he
hugs him and laughs). Jesus - what a terrible tie- Come on, the
Governor's coming at 3. And before then I have a little surprise for
you and the Boss.
DAVID calls to ANNIE.
DAVID:
Annie ... would you look after Kevin? And Kevin - you look after Bean.
He heads off with BERNIE. Back at the counter. BEAN, KEVIN & ANNIE.
KEVIN:
My Dad told me all about you.
ANNIE:
Did he now?
KEVIN:
He says you've got a babe count of ten out of ten, and a brain cell
count of about two and a half.
ANNIE:
Yeah, I'll go with that. I'm kinda, like, dumb, intellectually. (to
Bean) But I'm great in bed.
BEAN is unsettled by this. He gives a shudder and heads for the
gallery.
79
KEVIN:
Catch you later, babe.(goes after Bean) Come on, Beanie - there must be
a computer here somewhere. I hate paintings. They don't do anything.
CUT TO:
INT. GRIERSON'S OFFICE. DAY.
BERNIE, DAVID and GRIERSON. BERNIE looks very confident at a computer
monitor. A painting is in fact 'doing' something, on the computer
screen, as the girls in a Toulouse-Lautrec painting actually dance the
can-can.
GRIERSON:
Well, congratulations. Isn't that great, David?
DAVID:
Certainly is.
BERNIE:
We'll be able to start this afternoon. I'11 pipe the guide to every
video screen in the gallery. Now, that'll impress the Governor.
GRIERSON:
Well, bravo! What with you and Whistler's Ma - I think I've got a
winning team.
DAVID slightly embarrassed not to be included in the winning team. He
looks to the poster of Whistler's Mother behind GRIERSON's desk.
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY. BERNIE'S ROOM - DAY
KEVIN and BEAN have found a computer, also showing BERNIE's Gallery
programme. The monitor shows the interior of the ground floor of the
gallery. KEVIN clicks, and up comes the same Toulouse Lautrec picture.
As KEVIN works the mouse, BEAN hums the catchy tune from 'GOBLINS 21.
It's play time again.
KEVIN:
This is way cool, Beanie.
He clicks again, and a tiny talking Toulouse Lautrec starts to explain
the provenance of the painting.
80
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY. THE WHISTLER ROOM. DAY
DAVID is overseeing things. There's a burgundy rope, keeping people a
bit away from the case in which Whistler's Mother is contained. ELMER
brings in two large flower displays. BERNIE enters.
BERNIE:
Jesus! Hurry up you guys. Am I the only person round here who
actually gets things done.
He exits. BERNIE is growing in confidence - and getting nastier by the
minute. DAVID pulls a face at ELMER.
DAVID:
You arrange those flowers yourself?
ELMER:
Sure did.
DAVID:
They're pretty. Learn it in the army?
ELMER:
No - but when you've torn out a man's throat with your bare hands, you
learn to appreciate the beautiful things in life.
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY - DAY
The final touches in the preparation for the big visit to up-tempo,
"we're getting ready" music.
1.Gardeners gardening, window cleaners cleaning, polishers
polishing etc. And someone empties a dustbin, in the midst of which we
glimpse something which might be a scrunched up old Whistler painting.
2.BERNIE watches as someone plugs in a plug - and a huge video
screen in the gallery flickers and starts up.
3.ANNIE at her counter, reading a book called 'The Art of
Conversational. She shakes an imaginary hand and rehearses a keen
conversation with an imaginary V.I.P.
81
4.ELMER, in the men's room mirror, trims his hair around his peaked
hat with scissors. He has a row of war medals on his chest. He
polishes them proudly with his sleeve.
5.GRIERSON watches through the front glass - a red carpet rolls
itself out from the gallery's main entrance to stop by the rear door of
a black car.
CUT TO:
EXT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY - DAY
Close on the bottom of the black cars rear door. It opens and a pair
of legs, wearing black shoes and charcoal trousers, step out onto the
red carpet. As they walk purposely up the carpet, the camera pans up
their owner's body, to reveal that this is BERNIE. It's a rehearsal.
He is met with a hand shake by GRIERSON at the main entrance.
GRIERSON:
What a pleasure, Governor Reynolds. I'd like you to meet some of our
staff here. (checks a prompt card).
BERNIE:
And that's where you introduce me to the Governor.
GRIERSON:
Right. Got it.
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY. RECEPTION AREA - DAY
Gallery staff wait, all wearing name badges. GRIERSON leads BERNIE to
the reception counter. ANNIE steps out from behind it and shakes
BERNIE's hand.
ANNIE:
Good day, Governor Reynolds. I'm Annie ...
BERNIE:
Curtsy.
ANNIE:
Curtsy? Are you kidding? This is 1990s America. Women don't curtsy,
they run the damn country!
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GRIERSON:
Alex, please!
ANNIE:
That's Annie, sir.
GRIERSON takes BERNIE on to ELMER who is next in line.
GRIERSON:
This is Elmer, our longest serving...
BERNIE:
Hey. Let's junk the medals, Elmer. This is not a Veterans' reunion.
We wanna make the Governor feel at home. Not remind him of piles of
ELMER puts on a defiant face. DAVID shakes his head disapprovingly.
GRIERSON moves BERNIE to meet DAVID. They
'Shake hands.
DAVID:
David Leary. I'd like to echo my colleagues welcome to you and thank
you for your patronage ...
BERNIE rudely cuts him off.
BERNIE:
Okay, that'll do. The Governor's here in half an hour. We have to be
totally ready then. No excuses. Period!
GRIERSON:
Thank you Bernie. Well done. Now, If you'll excuse - I have a little
smartening up to do myself.
CUT TO:
INT. THE GRIERSON GALLERY. BERNIE'S OFFICE - DAY
BEAN at the computer. He's actually quite enjoying himself now. In
fact, he's rather hogging the thing. This is, after all, an animated
catalogue - his area.
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"Bean" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bean_695>.
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