Beer for My Horses Page #4

Get out!

- Hey, easy.

Not you, hotshot.

You earned yourself a few more

nights here at the five-star.

Looks like you got a big date

with the FBI.

You know, my brother gonna come

looking for you.

And you're not gonna like it

when he finds you.

Heh-heh! Well, you tell

your brother this, tough guy.

I'm easy to find.

Thursday night,

I'm pig hunting with Lonnie.

Friday night, I'm drinking beer

at the Thirsty Monkey.

Saturday morning,

I'll be at my house

drinking coffee

at the kitchen table.

And Saturday afternoon,

I'm taking your ass

to Oklahoma City

so you can find a horny convict

to be your love piata

for the next 50 years.

Comprende?

Come on, Lonnie.

Let this guy stay here.

Hey, stranger,

what are you doing?

I was about to ask you

the same thing,

driving down the wrong side

of the road like that.

Isn't that illegal?

Well, not if it's official

police business, it's not.

Oh, so that's what this is?

Well, if anybody asks,

it is.

So are you lost?

No, I just came into town

to pick up a few things.

How's your momma doing?

She's all right.

- Yeah?

She's resting.

- Hm.

So, uh,

I was gonna run over to Altus

and catch a movie

tomorrow night.

By yourself?

Well, if you're not going.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm going.

- Yeah?

All right. So I'll pick you up

at Buck's house?

Why don't I come by your place?

- Okay.

How about 6:
00ish?

How about 6:
00?

How about I'll be there?

Uh-huh.

Mm-mm.

Now, let me get a little

of you walking home.

Damn. Mm-mm.

Sure is nice out

here tonight, ain't it?

Well, that's all it is.

I gotta piss.

I knew we should've gone down

to the river.

There ain't a pig out here.

- How would you know?

Rack, I've hunted pigs

my whole life.

I've probably killed more pigs

than any man in Greer County.

Is that so?

- It's primal instincts.

I know how they eat.

I know how they sleep.

I know

their breeding habits.

I can talk to them

if I need to. Heh-heh!

You can talk to pigs?

- Yup.

Lonnie,

you're full of pig sh*t.

Say what you want, Rack,

but I am a pig's

worst nightmare.

The last thing

a pig wants to see coming

is Lonnie Luther Freeman.

- Luther?

Yeah.

- That's your middle name? Luther?

Be careful.

You know what I did

to the last guy

that made fun

of my middle name?

What's that?

Not a whole lot.

He's about 6'4", 250.

You know, we could always drive

over to the Thirsty Monkey.

There's a lot of pigs

over there.

No, Rack. You know,

I'm done chasing women.

I got Becky, and I'm happy.

She don't complain about me,

and she don't mind me

complaining about her.

You-all ever think about

getting married?

Oh, she does,

all the time.

You know,

I'm just afraid if we did

she wouldn't be as inclined

to take as good care of herself

as she does now,

you know?

I mean, hell,

you've seen her sister.

Ugh.

You gotta be at the table early

at Thanksgiving

when she's around.

My Lord.

She did kinda swell up,

didn't she?

Oh, like a eight-legged

dog tick.

Hey, did, uh,

Cammie ever come back?

No, I don't think

she's coming back.

I think she's gone for good.

Aw. Oh, man. I'm sorry

to hear about that.

Guess who is back in town.

- Who?

Annie Streets.

- My God,

she was hotter than donut grease

back in high school.

She still is.

And I got a date with her

tomorrow night.

You dog.

You dog.

Well, if you're

gonna keep her this time,

maybe you oughta try doing

something a little different.

I'm gonna suggest

not being yourself.

I do need to get my sh*t

together.

You?

Yeah.

- Huh. Heh-heh!

You want a beer?

If you're not gonna talk to me,

Rack, just take me home.

What?

I had a nice time tonight.

Well, the night ain't over yet.

Let's go for a walk.

Oh, I don't know,

the streets of Altus, Oklahoma

could be pretty dangerous

this time of night.

I'll take my chances.

Rack?

What?

Oh, I just wanted

to apologize

for what Buck said to you

the other day

and disrespecting your daddy

like that.

Don't worry about that.

That stepdaddy of yours

is a piece of work.

What'd your momma

ever see in him anyway?

Heh! I don't know.

But I think at the beginning,

she really did love him.

Then it became more about

security

and making sure

I was taken care of.

God bless her.

How do you put up with him?

It's not easy.

If Momma didn't live there,

I wouldn't need him.

So who's gonna take care

of your momma

when you go back to Chicago?

Well, I'm not sure

I'm going back.

What do you mean?

Momma needs me,

and I miss small-town life,

Rack.

The big city's

too fast for me.

I miss the people here.

I miss the pace.

Heck, I even miss

the Tasty Cream.

Believe it or not,

I kinda missed you too.

I missed you too, Annie.

I-I got you something.

Heh-heh!

Yeah, um...

Here. Heh.

Where did you get that?

Dug it out of

an old box yesterday.

Your daddy took it.

I thought you might want it.

Remember our first date?

Your old truck broke down,

and we had to walk

all that way back in the rain.

Wow. Thanks, Annie.

Golly, we were soaked.

I never thanked you

for wearing that white T-shirt.

Those were good times, Rack.

Yes, they were.

- Yeah.

Wow.

You've been practicing.

Well, you've been gone

a long time.

Well, we should do this again.

Well,

the night ain't over yet.

Well,

what do you wanna do?

I don't know, maybe we'd...

go get a corn dog

and go to my house?

Oh, Rack, you're so romantic.

Corn dog?

Well, I think I got her

fertilizing for you there...

There, Rack.

I appreciate you getting here

on such short notice, Bob.

Ah, short notice,

long notice,

it don't make

no difference to me.

I ain't been...

I ain't been...

I ain't been

too busy today, anyhow.

Well, I tell you. You plumbers

sure are lifesavers.

Well, I'll tell you what,

I appreciate that,

but you know what?

This job,

it ain't, uh, what it's, uh...

It's cracked up to be.

- Must be hard.

Bet it is.

There are three things...

There is, uh...

Three things to, uh...

There are three things

to be a plumber.

I'm talking about

a good plumber.

What's that?

Sh*t runs downhill.

Don't chew your fingernails.

And payday is on Friday.

I believe that.

Hey, I'll see around. All right.

- Okay, Rack.

Toodles.

- Hello?

Buck Baker called the sheriff

early this morning.

He was all upset.

Annie didn't come home.

We found her car out here,

abandoned.

The car is clean, Rack.

The keys

still in the ignition.

The purse is there

with nothing missing.

Wasn't a robbery.

We don't have

any witnesses.

Hey, Buck.

Levins,

what are you doing here?

Just checking up on Buck,

seeing how he's doing.

Can I talk to him?

- Come on in.

Rack.

Buck, what can you tell me

about Annie?

Well, she left about 6:00

yesterday evening.

I haven't seen her since.

You guys heard anything?

Where she was last night?

What she did?

Well, she was with me

last night.

- She was with you?

Yeah, we went over

to Altus

and saw a movie.

Well, where did she go

after the movie?

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