Beer for My Horses Page #3

You lookin' a little rough

this morning, Rack.

Oh, I'm all right.

- Where's Cammie?

She went on vacation.

- Really? Where'd she go?

I'm not sure.

You-all break up again?

Yeah.

- I already heard.

You want your usual, baby?

And then Junior farted,

and I knew something big

was gonna happen.

Then, about that time,

the tip of the Zebco

just went straight down

in the water.

And I just set the hook.

And I fought that son of a b*tch

for about 20 minutes.

It was a snapping turtle.

Rack, I am surprised

you even let him carry a gun.

Do you hear Annie Streets

was back in town?

No, really?

- Yeah.

Her momma

got the Alzheimer's,

and she flew in from Chicago,

help take care of her.

Well, what about her stepdad?

Don't he take care of her?

Buck Baker? Sh*t.

All he cares about

is making money.

He's too busy

trying to bully farmers

into selling him their land

for a dime on the dollar.

Hell, he practically owns

every farm in the county now.

He never got Daddy's farm.

Well, he's one of the few

that stood up to him.

Rest his soul.

When I was dating Annie,

me and him never got along.

You know,

I always just knew

you two would get married

someday.

She wanted to go off

and see the big city.

There's no way I was leaving.

You've still got it for her.

You always have.

Why don't you go see her?

She probably got some

big high-dollar boyfriend

back in Chicago.

I saw her here the other day.

She didn't have no ring

on her finger.

We had our time together

a long time ago.

Anybody ever tell you

you are stone lazy?

Annie is the only female

ever come close

to giving you a run

for your money.

And that's what you were

missing in your life,

in case youse a-wondering.

So why don't you leave me

a big fat tip,

get off your sorry ass,

and go see her?

And take her something nice.

It's a little cool

out here.

Here you go.

Keep you warm.

Oh, my God.

Momma?

Joe Bill Racklin.

What in the world?

Hi, Annie.

What are you doing out here?

Oh, I don't know. I guess

I just wanted to come out here

and see what a big-city girl

looks like these days.

Heh! Oh, yeah, well,

what do you think?

Well, she looks a lot

like a, uh, small-town girl

I used to know

a long time ago.

Pretty as a picture.

Oh, stop it, Rack. What

are you really doing out here?

Well, actually, I came here

to bring you some corn dogs

from the Tasty Cream.

I remember how much you

used to like them so much.

Wow.

Well, I didn't really

have much of a choice,

'cause it was the only place

you'd ever take me.

Uh, I got you

some, uh...

mustard here somewhere.

Damn.

I got you the wrong one.

I got ketchup. I got...

Rack,

you haven't changed a bit.

Is that a good thing?

Yeah, I guess.

Been a long time, Annie.

Yeah, it sure has.

So, uh, Buck's got quite a place

here, huh?

Yeah, it's changed a lot

since I left.

He bought up a whole lot

of acreage.

See all those buildings

over there?

All new.

Trucks a-going

day and night.

Wow.

- Yeah.

Mrs. Baker?

I think the last time

I was out here was when you...

Hey, Rack.

How you doing there,

buddy?

Hey, Buck.

How's the, uh, deputy life

suiting you?

It's honest dollar.

An honest dollar.

You and your daddy both.

I was sorry to hear

about his heart attack.

Looks like he kinda

worked himself to death, huh?

Rack, why don't you

come on inside

and I'll fix you

some sweet tea?

Oh, that's okay, Annie. I

probably gotta get back to town.

I got some deputy stuff

I need to go take care of.

I'll see you.

Hey, Rack!

If you, uh, ever decide

to sell your daddy's farm,

call me first.

Hell, you ain't no farmer, son.

You're a bigtime deputy.

Does it take practice

being a grade-A a**hole, Buck,

or were you just born one?

Born one.

Hey, buddy.

Are we still going pig hunting?

I thought you and Becky

was going over to Lawton.

No, she's, uh, keeping

her sister's kids and that,

so Daddy's got a hall pass.

Well, by God, then it looks like

we're going pig hunting.

What the hell

are you doing?

Rack, watch this.

Okay, Junior.

Bite me, boy.

Bite me, Junior.

Bite me, Junior.

Junior, bite me.

He did it earlier.

Come on, Junior.

Bite me. Damn it, Junior.

Attack me.

Lonnie, cut that racket,

will you?

Get rid of that fleabag.

Yes, sir.

Come on, Junior.

Let's go.

Any news on that Mexican boy?

Uh, we send the prints

over to the feds.

We're still waiting

on a positive ID.

Okay.

Hey, Mavis?

We get that, uh, fax in

from Oklahoma City yet?

No, but you'll be

the first to know when I do.

Sheriff in?

How about a "good morning"?

Just tell the sheriff I'm here.

Hey. Ungh!

Sheriff, the DA's here.

- What's he want?

An ass-whupping,

the way he's talking to me.

Mavis, you send him on

back here then.

Oh, that's...

I knew I smelled

something rotten.

Well...

Hear you boys had a big weekend.

Congratulations

on the arrests,

but, uh, we need to discuss

this case.

What's to discuss?

Well, I spoke

with the judge,

and we don't think we have

a good enough case...

You don't have a good case?

- No.

We caught 'em stealing

red-handed.

Fertilizer.

Caught 'em stealing fertilizer.

Heh! Frankly, gentlemen,

we feel this entire affair

has been totally mishandled.

Mishandled?

They fired shots at us.

Rack, let me handle this.

Close the door.

I mean, close the door with you

on the other side of it.

Now, the truth of the matter is

we don't really know

what these boys were planning

on doing with the fertilizer.

We all know what they were

gonna do with that fertilizer.

They weren't tending

sick lilies.

They're making meth.

Then we should have had the feds

come in and take care of it.

You've already

blown the opportunity

to set up

surveillance operations,

tracking their money sources,

making them lead us

to the big boys

in their manufacturing

and distribution network.

And now,

because of your, uh,

rogue deputies there,

we got nothing to show for it,

except maybe a lawsuit

for skewering a man's buttocks

with an arrow.

I mean... Hee-hee!

What the hell kind of a

department are you running here?

Is this what you've been

waiting for, Rack?

Yeah.

This may be of interest to you,

Mr. DA.

Tito Garza,

wanted on federal charges.

Drug trafficking, racketeering,

attempted murder charge.

Feds want us to deliver him

to Oklahoma City on Saturday.

Well, I'll, uh, run that by

the judge, see what's what.

You may wanna take a look

at that file too, sheriff.

Thank you, Mavis. Well, what

have we got here? Who's this?

That's Manny Garza.

That's Tito's brother.

He heads up... Oh, nothing.

...just the biggest drug cartel

in all of Mexico.

Well, this is

terribly interesting,

but I am due in court.

If you'll excuse me.

- Mm-hm.

You have a nice day, Mr. L.

Fall out boys,

off your ass, on your feet,

out of the shade

and in the heat.

We're going to the courthouse

for your arraignments.

On the hop.

Let's go, move it, girls!

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