Bicentennial Man Page #5

-Just a little bit

just a little bit

-Yeah

[Buzzing]

Hi.

-Is this yours?

-Oh. [Giggles]

Thank you.

I'm looking for Rupert Burns.

Oh, you've come

to the right place.

-Come in.

-Certainly have.

Huh.

-Do you have a name?

-Of course I do.

Galatea.

Galatea.

You have an amazing...

agility.

You were dancing

in the market.

-Did you like that?

-Very much.

Dancing is

the sportiest sport,

and we're so much better

at it than humans.

I can't believe

I finally found you.

When did you know?

-Know what?

-That you were unique.

Oh, I knew that right away.

Me too.

You and I--

we're the same.

We have personality!

Is your personality chip

turned on?

-Isn't yours?

-No.

Sucks to be you!

I think personality is

much more fun than intelligence,

don't you?

-[Aretha Franklin]

Baby, baby, sweet baby

-I think so.

There's somethin'

that I've just got to say

Can I help you?

Your robot is just

a standard NDR, isn't she?

Yeah, I'm afraid so.

Why does she have

the ability to dance?

'Cause I, uh--

I put a modified skeletal chip

into her during a rebuild.

-How were you able

to do that modification?

-My father taught me.

He created the android unit

at NorthAm Robotics.

He's responsible for

the technology that allows you

to mimic human expression.

-What happened to him?

-Well, NorthAm laid him off

when they shut down the unit,

so he started this place,

and I took over when he died.

-I'm sorry to hear that.

-He would have been

absolutely thrilled to meet you.

I-I-I'm Rupert Burns.

-It's a real honor.

-The honor is mine.

-[Continuing]

-Hey! You and I--we're the same!

-Let's get loco, robo!

-[Metallic Clink]

Whoo-hoo!

-Shut her off or I will.

-Oh.

Okay.

[Stops]

Thank you.

[Andrew]

Is this your father's work?

Yeah--Well, it's--

it's our work, you could say.

I haven't really been able

to restrain myself from continuing...

to tinker with the relentlessly

unfashionable android technology.

As a matter of fact,

I've actually gotten to a point...

where I can pretty much

exactly replicate the external

physical appearance...

of a human being.

-Remarkable.

-Thank you.

-Amazing!

-Yeah.

Unfortunately, nobody seems terribly

interested in funding my research.

-But--

-I am.

I will fund your research.

Yeah?

That'd be cool.

Thank you, darlin'. Okay.

Andrew, I want to make it

very clear:

This is an external physical

upgrade only in the strictest

sense of the word.

You'll feel nothing.

None of your internal mechanisms

will be changed.

You'll still be subject

to the parameters

of your positronic brain.

-Is that clear?

-Understood.

Okay, good. Now,

have you given any thought

whatsoever as to what age

you'd like to be?

Officially,

I am 62 years old.

-Let's take off 25 years.

What do ya say?

-Fifteen.

-Twenty. Good.

-Perfect.

Now, Andrew, believe it or not,

the secret to all this is actually...

-imperfection.

-Imperfection?

Yeah. Things like...

wrinkles, uh,

less-than-perfect teeth,

details like fading scars,

little pockmark--

Look at my nose.

See my nose?

-It's bulbous and slightly irregular?

-It is.

Well, I'm the only one

who's got my nose,

and that's what makes me, me.

We need to incorporate

these features into your design...

so that you can be

the only one of you.

That's what makes us unique,

is those imperfections.

I see.

Like the shape of your head.

-What about the shape of my head?

-It's huge.

Oh.

But lovely.

Thank you.

Oh.

Ah. Oh.

-[Screams]

-[Screams]

-What happened? What's going on?

-[Screams]

What happened?

I saw the inner me.

[Whirring]

[Beeping]

[Sighing]

-Is it ready?

-Okay.

Please, be careful.

Don't drop me.

-I'm being careful. Oh, my God!

-[Gasps]

just relax,

relax, relax.

Why did you do that?

That wasn't very funny.

just keepin' ya

on your toes.

-I don't have any toes.

-You do now.

I do.

And hands.

And fingers.

How do I look?

See for yourself.

Thank you.

[Piano]

-Beautiful.

-[Gasps, Screams]

-Sorry.

-Who are you?

Andrew.

Andrew?

You look wonderful,

even younger.

-How do you do that?

-Do-Do I know you?

Well, I know

I look different too.

-I've had an upgrade. Touch it.

-What?

-No, oh, no! No.

-Sorry, the face.

What's going on?

You leave her alone!

-Who are you?

-Andrew.

No. Andrew?

-Yes.

-But Andrew's a robot.

-Yes, I am.

Well, now, an android.

-He's had an upgrade.

-I know that.

-[Eyelids Squeaking]

-Oh!

-Hello.

[Gasps]

Hello! It is you.

-You know him?

-Yes.

-You know me?

-Yes.

-Who are you? No?

-I'm Little Miss. Yes.

-That's Little Miss.

-No.

-No? No?

-No.

-No, that's Portia.

-Portia? Yes.

-Portia?

-Yes.

-Who's Portia?

-My granddaughter.

-Your granddaughter?

-Yes. Yes.

-Is this some kind of trick?

-No.

-You're Little Miss?

-Yes.

Why do you have to look

like her?

-There is and can be

only one Little Miss.

-Really?

-Yes!

-It's a genetic resemblance.

Sometimes it skips a generation.

-I don't care. I don't like it.

-I can see that.

But if you took a moment,

which I see you're not

inclined to do right now,

you'd realize Portia and I

are very different people.

-Why is she imitating you?

-[Laughing]

-What's so funny?

-You are.

I'm not trying

to be funny.

Things have certainly

changed around here.

That happens

after 20 years.

I have so much to tell you.

Come. Come with me.

It is you.

Yes.

[Andrew]

Portia.

-Hello, my friend.

-Hello, Little Miss.

Whose daughter is she?

-Lloyd's.

-Oh. Now the rudeness makes sense.

[Dog Barking]

[Whimpering]

Go.

Go home to your master.

[Barks]

You don't have a home,

do you?

I don't have food.

I don't eat.

Come in. We'll keep

each other company.

I know you don't like me.

Well, I don't like you either.

I just wanna make that clear.

-It couldn't be more clear

if you spat in my face.

-I can't.

I don't have

a mucous gland.

Would it be possible to have

a slightly longer conversation?

May my canine companion

enter also?

Thank you.

Is this your sculpture?

No, I'm restoring it.

I'm a preservation architect.

It's quite horrendous.

How ugly was it

before you restored it?

-Listen. First, you get mad

at me because of how I look.

-Mm-hmm.

Tonight you show up at my door,

announce that you don't like me,

and then you criticize my work.

Once again, I apologize

for telling the truth.

But it can't be helped.

It's my programming.

What is it exactly

that you want?

Family.

My last name is Martin,

I am so named because

your great-grandfather

and grandmother...

considered me to be

a member of your family.

Now, Sir is dead.

Little Miss is getting older.

You don't like me, but at least

you'll talk to me if I knock

on your door long enough.

-Is that a joke?

-No.

Would you like to hear a joke?

This Buddhist walks up

to a hot dog vendor and says,

"Make me one

with everything."

[Laughing]

-Andrew, do you--do you have

any friends at all?

-No.

Only Woofy, who's very sweet,

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