Birthday Girl Page #8

The light throws huge shadows on the walls and flickers across

their faces.

He sets the cake down on the table and sits down opposite

Nadia

JOHN:

Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday

to you. Happy Birthday dear Nadia...

The front doorbell rings. A loud long burst. Nadia's face

transforms into a big grin. She hurries out into the hall,

leaving John alone with the cake. Nadia whooping and shouting

excitedly. Other voices. Shouting. Shouting in Russian.

A man bursts in carrying Nadia in his arms. He spins her

round in the candlelight, kisses her, puts her down and goes

to the table where he blows out the candles. They are plunged

into darkness.

Lots of whooping and laughing. A Zippo flares up and

illuminates some faces, all laughing.

CUT TO:

John's hand groping along the wall. It finds the light switch.

There are two men here. One small and wiry, one big and dark,

like Rasputin. They each carry rucksacks and a guitar case.

YURI:

You must be John. You seem very nice.

Excuse me.

In Russian, the first man introduces Nadia to the other man,

who is relighting the candles with a Zippo. It seems they

haven't met before.

The first man, Yuri, pulls out a bottle of vodka and hands

it to John.

YURI:

How's that? We can't drink our piss

can we?

JOHN:

Hang on hang on, sorry, but like,

who are you?

YURI:

You must find some glasses, small,

for the toast, and some plates.

JOHN:

What are you doing here?

Yuri stops.

YURI:

Sorry. You've lost me...

JOHN:

I'm asking what you're here for.

YURI:

What?

Yuri speaks to Nadia in fast Russian.

YURI:

(to John)

You don't speak Russian? Pratsteetye!

This explains your cold eyes.

Nadia begins gabbling to Yuri in Russian. Yuri says the

English word -- "Friends".

NADIA:

(to John)

"Frenzy".

JOHN:

Yes I know.

YURI:

(himself)

Yuri.

(Rasputin)

Alexei. Alexei and Yuri.

Alexei speaks.

JOHN:

What did he say?

YURI:

He says he feels safe here.

Nadia talks fast to Yuri.

YURI:

She says she wanted to tell you but

her English is sh*t. And no one speaks

Russian, it's very hard for her. The

light please.

Alexei turns off the light again. Nadia blows out her candles.

They are plunged back into darkness. John turns the light on

again. Yuri is already sitting down.

JOHN:

I need to know who you are first

please.

YURI:

Oh.

(Yuri stands)

We are Russian.

JOHN:

Yes. I know.

YURI:

Good.

(he sits down)

JOHN:

And...

YURI:

And what? You mean from the beginning?

Jesus. Can I uh okay, as we say in

Russia can I cut a long story short.

Okay. Nadia is my little cousin.

Except she's not. But we say cousin.

This is for you.

He hands John another bottle of vodka.

JOHN:

Hold on.

YURI:

Toast first then we talk seriously,

I can see you are serious about us.

Vodka is splashed into their glasses. Yuri raises his glass

and shouts a toast in Russian: "Vashe Zdarovye!". They down

their vodka, John sips at his, then realises he must finish

it. Yuri makes as if to throw his in the fireplace.

YURI:

Just kidding.

Sausages, cheese, bread and pickle bottles rain onto the

table from Yuri's rucksack.

JOHN:

(to Yuri)

So hang on. You're both Nadia's

cousins?

YURI:

(shaking his head)

Of course not. Alexei, he's is my

problem.

JOHN:

Right.

YURI:

We better watch him. He's crazy.

JOHN:

Right.

YURI:

I am actor, he is actor, although he

is an actor stroke musician. I just

noodle along, I'm not so good. He

makes me look like a retard -- He

smokes me. I don't mean he smokes

me.

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