Boo 2! A Madea Halloween Page #9

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I'm not going with that creep.

Gabriella...

No, come on. I'm just gonna go look for her.

Don't, don't. Don't, don't, don't.

Why not?

You don't know what they're doin'

out in the woods. Just don't.

You should go with Dino.

I don't wanna go with him!

[SIGHS]

Look, I just wanna go home.

No. Why? We're having fun.

No, I'm getting sleepy.

- I'm tired. I just...

- Okay, well,

here, have a drink and dance!

No! Are you not aware

of how creepy this place is?

Fine. Go in one of the tents

and zip it all the way up.

People do all kinds of things in those tents.

I'm not going in one of those tents.

Okay. Okay, listen,

we got another tent, all right?

You can stay in there.

Just us girls?

Yeah, just us girls.

- Where is it?

- [DINO] Come on.

It's over there. I could show you.

What? Okay.

Bye! Good night!

- I'm coming back.

- Why?

So we can go in our tent.

Honey, I'm staying with Jonathan.

- What?

- Yes.

- Are you serious?

- Yes, I'm serious!

Bye, don't wait up.

- Fine.

- Fine!

- Fine!

- All right, come on. Let's go.

- Don't touch me. I'm not walking with you.

- [WHOOPING]

[CHUCKLES]

[LEAH WAILS] Wait, wait, wait! Wait.

Hold on. I need to call my dad.

Wait, what is your dad gonna do right now?

I don't know!

There's no reception!

Where's your phone? Give me your phone!

Leah, phones don't work out here, all right?

- What are we gonna do?

- Let's go! Let's go!

- [CHAINSAW BUZZING]

- [SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

[CHAINSAW WHIRRING]

[LEAH SCREAMING] Help!

[HORSE GROANING]

- [LEAH SCREAMING]

- [GRUNTS]

[LEAH] No! No! No!

[HORSE] No!

[LEAH] I'm gonna get help!

[MADEA] Joe, people like you

work on my nerve when they drive.

Put a little on the gas, let up

on the gas. That's how people get carsick.

[JOE] Shut up! Let me drive.

You better shut the hell up,

talkin' to me like that.

I will show you how to talk back...

[MADEA] This car is old.

It can't handle that.

Why is you tryin' to drive my car so hard?

Damn, that's what the hell I do

with a car and a woman and a ho.

I drive 'em hard.

[HATTIE LAUGHING]

Well, now, we ain't goin' nowhere.

Well, look like I'm finna put all you hoes

out on the streets to walk.

I'm not gettin' out this car

and walkin' goin' nowhere.

Do you know what the hell exercise is?

Exercise and exorcism,

that's what the hell...

You need to exercise, exorcism...

And a "circumcism." You need all them things.

Get out and exercise sometime, Mabel.

I ain't gettin' out this car. I know that.

I know that I'm not either.

You know I ain't walkin' nowhere.

'Cause you know you ain't exercisin'.

And you know what?

You gonna be the first one to go.

Why you say that?

[JOE] You know they gonna catch you.

'Cause everybody else gonna outrun your ass

and that's all they need,

is one little piece of meat

hangin' around behind

and they grab the low-hangin' fruit.

Hush, Joe.

- [LEAH] Help me!

- [SCREAMING]

What the hell?

Girl, I almost punched the hell outta you.

They're trying to kill me!

This that girl from the party.

[BAM] Don't open that door.

They're trying to kill me.

Who tryin' to kill you?

- Derrick!

- [BAM] Listen, baby...

Ain't no room in here. [STAMMERS]

We already are spread out in here.

Please, please, you have to let me in.

I seen that ass. Let her in here.

What's up, mama?

They already killed one man.

They're gonna kill me too

and they're trying to get Tiffany.

Wait, who they kill?

Horse!

- [HATTIE] Horse?

- Whores, huh?

That fine, sexy college boy?

What a waste of a man.

- Please.

- Calm down, baby. Calm down.

Ain't no need in gettin'

all excited. Big Papa here.

No, please help me.

Please, you have to help me.

[HATTIE] Nuh-uh! Nuh-uh!

I want both of them in here.

- [BAM] Both of what?

- Don't worry about it.

Girl, go ahead and get in the damn car.

- [HATTIE] Uh-uhh!

- [LEAH] Thank you.

[BAM] We don't have enough room for her.

Get in the car.

It's always the ones that's fat

tryin' to keep the sexy ones out.

Okay, we gotta go right now!

Wait a minute.

Talk to me, honey. Where's Tiffany at?

She's at the camp still!

Where is the camp at?

It's all the way up there.

- Well, we gonna have to go get her.

- [LEAH] Yeah.

- No, we don't.

- Uh-uh!

- Mm-hmm.

- Let's put it to a vote.

Well, look here. Go on and get her.

You know, they always need

a man to come rescue a damsel.

So go on, damn man.

I'm so sick of this.

Wait till this car stops smokin'.

- We will drive back there and get her.

- We'll what?

[SIGHS]

[BAM SCREAMS]

What the hell wrong with you?

- [CONTINUES SCREAMING]

- What the hell's wrong with you?

Look, look, look, look, look!

Oh, no, no, no!

I ain't gonna see him for a long time.

Yeah, you know what? I ain't worried.

That ain't nothin'

but them damn frat boys from that college.

No, no, no. It's not!

- You sure?

- Yes, I'm sure!

Look here, partner.

Go on out there and see if that's them.

Go on out there.

No, that's not them!

You know what? I'm not playing around.

I'm tired of this.

- [LEAH] No, no, no.

- [BAM] Mabel...

To hell with it. I got this.

Y'all sit there and hush.

[BAM] He is not turned on by you.

I'mma tell you this one time, okay?

I'm not gonna deal

with none of this bull from y'all.

I don't deal with this Halloween bullcrap!

Okay?

So let me make this perfectly clear.

I know it's y'all frat boys up in there

playing with this fake...

[CAR ENGINE CRANKING]

What the hell are you doing, Joe?

I'm getting ready to drive off.

You gonna leave your sister?

I don't like that dude.

[CAR ENGINE CRANKING]

Where your eyes?

[BAM] Mabel, here he come.

[HATTIE] Ma!

- Drive, Joe!

- [AIR HISSING]

Joe, I think you better drive.

- [CAR ENGINE CRANKING]

- Mabel, where did he go? Where did he go?

I don't know. I don't know now.

Drive, Joe!

- I told you, the tire flat.

- [ALL GROANING]

Let me tell you somethin'.

You ain't never seen me run from the po-po.

You better drive this son of a... Drive!

[CAR ENGINE SPUTTERING]

So, uh, this is the tent.

You've been saying

that for the past 20 minutes, okay?

Yep.

Sure you don't want me to stick around?

- No. I'm good, thank you.

- Check for spiders?

You can go.

It gets kind of lonely in here.

I can protect myself. Can you just go?

What if Derrick comes?

I don't care. I'm fine!

Okay, so it's cool if Derrick comes in.

I see how it is.

You know you're a little uptight?

- I don't care.

- Yeah, it's a lot of fun.

- [DISTANT LAUGHTER]

- You hear that?

You hear that right there?

How much fun they're having out there?

- That we're not?

- No, that sounds like little kids.

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

The hell?

- [GABRIELLA] What is that?

- I think I'm tripping out.

Yeah. You hear that? Definitely tripping.

Yeah, I hear that. That sounds like little...

[GIGGLING]

Oh, my gosh. Do you think

those are Derrick's daughters?

[GIGGLING]

I'm getting out of here, okay?

I'm grabbing Tiffany,

I'm getting out of here.

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