Boy Meets Girl Page #2

What,

and nothin' ever happened?

Not even once?

No, he- he doesn't like tra -

Like...?

Girls like me.

Girls like you.

Okay, what's not

to like about you?

You're gorgeous, funny, smart.

Well, thank you.

But, he, uh -

Tell her! Tell her.

Drown, you loser!

I swear on my mother,

I will swim out there

and drown you myself

if you don't shut it!

I'm just sayin'.

I'm so sorry about him.

Oh, no need to apologize.

But I am tellin' you it is

clear as day that that boy

has a crush on you,

regardless of what he says.

So, uh, what's your fianc do?

He's in Afghanistan.

He's a marine.

Just one more tour, and he'll

be home for good in the fall,

and then we'll

get married in the spring.

Oh.

So, uh, just a few more

months to live it up, huh?

Yeah, I'm-

I'm not really like that.

Like what?

Like someone who does

things she's always wanted to

for fear of life

lived with regret

will be far worse than

a life with experimentation

that has some great joys but

some skinned knees as well.

You clearly haven't

thought much about it.

No.

I'm just a normal girl.

Okay, so there is

one main reason why,

even if he did

like me like that,

we still couldn't be

anything more than friends.

Mm-hmm, and what's that?

- Well...

- Tell me.

Okay.

- What's your number?

- Why?

Just, please.

Uh, eight-five-nine-

five-five-five

seven-six-two-four.

Oh.

Who the heck is...?

It's me.

Oh!

How excitin'.

No.

But...

No!

Wow!

May I ask you a question?

Yeah, sure.

So where did you-

like where did you get it?

I mean who gave it to you?

What?

Y-your, um...

Oh!

Well, um, God, I guess?

When I was born.

Oh, my- okay,

so biologically you were born -

A boy.

Well, um,

so, uh, do you like it?

My...?

- Yeah.

- Oh! Yeah, I mean,

I do, it's just I wish

I'd been born a genetic girl.

I do plan on gettin'

the full surgery someday.

It's just so expensive.

But, for now,

I might as well

just dance with the one

that brung me, right?

And it's not really

about hatin' my body,

so I've learned to live with it.

And do you- do you like

keep it a secret that you..?

Oh, no, no, no.

I am completely

comfortable with who I am,

and I like to make sure

everybody else

in my life is, too.

So, you know,

whether it's a boy,

or like you, a new friend,

um, if for any reason

it should or does come up,

I mean, I just get

it right out in the open.

Well, we are new friends,

aren't we?

I think so.

you don't go fallin'

in love with me or anything.

Well, right back at ya!

- You idiot, my hair!

- Oh, God, it's cold!

Ah!

Robby, how do you do?

Francesca.

Charmed, I'm sure.

So, you new in town?

- Uh, yes and no.

- She grew up here,

but then went

off to boardin' school.

Now she's back and waitin'

for her handsome marine

to come home

so they can get married.

Oh, cool.

Who's your fianc?

David Applebee.

No.

Oh, you know him?

Oh, yeah, I know him.

We went to high school together.

Wait,

so do you know him, too?

- I don't think so.

- Of course you do.

It's that kid who kept

tryin' to knock you out

in pee-wee football.

- Really?

- He did that?

Y'all just seem so nice.

I would feel bad if he was

ever mean to you either of you.

Hey, he's fightin'

for our country.

He's cool by me.

Thank you.

You be nice to our new friend.

Come on, now, I'm always nice.

Ah!

- Oh, my God!

- Stop it.

You're gonna get it, Robby.

Come on, now.

Whoo!

Help us!

Help us!

The sharks are coming!

The Fourth Division

of the Fighters of the Republic

will save you.

Hurry! Hurry!

You're incredible.

Our hero.

Really,

there's no need for that.

And besides, I'm not

allowed to kiss on duty anyway.

Well,

when do you get off duty?

Um, right now!

Are you corruptin'

that army man again?

It didn't come.

I already checked.

You'll get accepted.

I know it!

Thanks, kiddo.

Now don't worry, honey.

Vera Wang's

got nothin' on you.

Vera Wang does

wedding gowns, Dad.

I don't wanna

do wedding gowns.

All right, well, you know,

Betsy Johnson then.

She went bankrupt.

I mean she's back now,

but I don't wanna go bankrupt.

You wanna give

your old man a break?

I'm a mechanic,

for cryin' out loud.

I'm sorry, Dad.

I am very impressed

with your fashion acumen.

All right,

you tread lightly now.

What's acumen mean?

Well, it means

that I have a- a wealth

of deep and insightful

knowledge about many things.

In this case,

about the fashion world

that your big sister's

about to reinvent.

I have pie acumen.

Indeed you do, Son.

Indeed you do.

Hello, Baby.

Ah, I miss you, Baby Doll.

So how's everythin'

goin' at home?

Well, I am

gettin' my dress tomorrow.

Oh, you're gonna

look just like an angel.

You know, that's probably

the one thing civilized

about these Arabs,

saving themselves for marriage.

Just like you, Baby.

My virgin angel.

God, stop!

Oh! Hey, uh, I made

some new friends today,

and they say they know you.

- No way.

- Yeah.

Well, who?

Uh, Robby Riley?

Uh, and his friend Ricky?

The tranny?

- Don't call her that.

- You hung out with them?

Well, she's just like

any other normal girl.

I mean she's just like me.

Okay, seriously,

you're gonna make me puke now

you keep talkin' like that.

Well, she said since you're

fightin' for America and all,

that you're

all right in her book.

Yeah, well, I ain't

fightin' for the America

that f***ing thing is part of!

I just miss you, Baby.

I can't wait 'til you're home.

Ninety-three more days.

Yeah.

Well, I gu-I guess

I should be goin'.

Oh, yeah.

I love you.

Be careful.

I love you too, Baby.

Really, Ricky,

don't worry about it.

I'm not worried,

I'm just annoyed.

They should

be growin' faster by now.

I've been on hormones

for, like, seven years

Yeah, but guy-guys

don't care about that sh*t.

Yeah, well as soon

as I can afford it

I'm gonna get implants.

No, but-but it's, Ricky,

it's not the size, okay?

It's the- it's the shape,

it's the feel,

it's the- it's the buoyancy.

You don't know

what buoyancy means.

The cute little tits

are just so sexy, okay?

They feel great,

they're wonderful.

I- those-those big ole

fake balloons f***in' thing -

I wouldn't get

anything like that.

Just nice,

small elegant C-cups.

I-I wouldn't.

Really.

Don't you peek, now.

Yuck. As if.

Okay, Sam,

you can come back in.

Is that one gonna work?

I think so.

Who's that from?

- New girlfriend.

- Who?

Invite her over.

Well, who is she?

This new girlfriend?

None of your business.

Shut your mouth.

Hi, may I come in?

- Of course, hey!

- Hi.

Wow.

You look...

really cute.

Well, thank you.

Hey, Robby.

Hey.

And who is this?

This is my little brother, Sam.

Sam, this is Francesca.

Well, hello, Sam.

Nice to meet you.

Now don't tell me

you made that, too.

Yup.

Wow.

Oh, um, hey, uh,

do you think

I can use your ladies'

room real quick?

Uh, yeah, it's down

the stairs to the left.

Okay.

Do you have an extra tampon?

I swear I thought I brought one.

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