Boy Toy Page #4

- Shoot!

Yeah, some chick gave me the address

to this yoga place.

No, I'm gonna

head there now.

Okay, bye.

There you go.

She didn't want

to talk to me?

Are you busy right now?

I'm watching the game.

I'm gonna need a ride

to yoga in about five minutes.

Also I'll need to borrow a pair of shorts,

maybe a top.

Goal! Yes!

Oh, what a goal!

This is the spot right here.

Okay. Good?

Yeah.

- A hug?

- No.

Okay, good.

All right, be safe.

Call you later.

Okay.

Make me proud.

Do it for me.

- Love you, buddy.

- Love you.

- Hello.

- Hello.

What's up?

Whoa.

I love yoga.

Hi. Norah.

Nice. I'm Jake.

Listen, this is

my first time to yoga,

so I didn't really know

what to wear, you know,

if you could tell

by what I'm wearing.

I can see that.

Listen, I was wondering maybe you and I

could partner up or something

and you could show me

a few moves.

Thank you. Actually I'm gonna

show you plenty of moves.

- I'm the instructor.

- Oh, you're the instructor.

Oh, that's great. I've got a really

naturally athletic body,

so don't hold back.

Push me.

Okay, I'll keep that

in mind.

What are you drinking there?

Don't tell me. Let me guess.

It's a protein strawberry

blueberry mocha-shake?

- Water.

- God, water.

- I was close, wasn't I?

- Close.

Let me guess, you're trying to guess

what she likes to drink

so she might actually fall for one

of your little high school one-liners.

Actually yeah.

Oh, well, that's too bad,

because my friend Norah here

has a very strict personal

and professional policy

where she does not date

her students...

- But l...

...ever.

Which is such a shame.

But it's nothing personal.

I just don't date my students.

Why don't you go find a spot?

I think you guys got the wrong impression

about me, okay?

I'm here for my job

and to work out, maybe...

Jake, I'm so glad

that you came.

- Isn't this the cutest yoga studio ever?

- Yeah.

And you met my friend Norah.

Norah's the best.

- I did. She's great.

- Thanks, Jeanie.

- Hi Kylie.

- Bye Jeanie.

There's room next to me

in the back.

- L... no...

- Yeah, come on.

Thanks for bringing

your girlfriend.

Remember, a naturally

athletic body. Push me.

- What a loser.

- Go to your mat.

All right, guys, welcome.

Let's just stand here

for a second

breathing in,

letting go of our whole day,

putting it out the door,

focusing on the present moment,

inhaling,

exhaling through our nose.

Great. Wonderful.

These look beautiful,

you guys...

beautiful.

Okay, let's inhale.

On the exhale, let's bend that front leg

a little bit deeper.

Wonderful.

Let's stay there,

inhaling, exhaling,

relaxing our shoulders.

That front knee is bent.

Great. Wonderful.

These look beautiful,

you guys... beautiful.

Okay, let's inhale.

On the exhale,

let's bend that front leg.

Great. Good job, Jake.

Uh-huh.

Okay, let's keep our front leg bent,

back leg straight.

Hips are gonna be facing

the front of the room.

Great job, you guys.

Everyone did fantastic.

Yeah.

See you next week.

Oh, wasn't that

so relaxing?

Relaxing is not really

a word I'd use

- to describe what we just did.

- Oh, sorry.

I was thinking about going to the park

and taking a run. You want to come?

- That's actually a great idea.

- Yeah?

Yeah, but I'm gonna stay here for a while.

But I'll meet you up later on.

Yeah? Pinkie promise?

- Okay, great.

- Okay.

- I'll see you later on.

- Sure.

Good job, Robert.

You're a natural.

Really?

- See you next class?

- Yeah, for sure, yeah.

Okay.

Bye, guys.

Boy Toy.

Is that my beard trimmer?

Yeah yeah, man.

I've got to free the cobra

from the jungle, you know?

You mind?

Come on.

Thanks, buddy.

Question is, who's

the first lucky lady

to jump

on the Jake train?

B*tch is hot.

Yeah, she's got a handful.

I like this place.

A great place.

Cheers to us.

So, Sandra Dean,

tell me about yourself.

Where are you from?

Well, I'm a Southern gal,

pumpkin.

I've had five

loving husbands.

- Five?

- But they all keeled over

before our five-year

anniversary.

Well, I guess I just

burn them out.

Ooh ooh.

They can't handle too much

Sandra Dean!

Oh, I love this song.

Hi Jake.

Remember me?

Becca. Becca.

Of course I remember you.

How could I forget you,

Becca?

All right.

That's my... my Aunt Sandra,

my father's sister.

So where have you been? I haven't

heard from you after that night.

Oh, I was...

I've been, you know,

in the witness

protection program.

- Oh.

- Gerard, come on.

- Gerard?

- Um, that's my cover name.

Oh, all right.

- You should call me...

- I will.

...when you're done with this

- witness protection thing.

- Yeah.

I've really missed you.

- Same number?

- Uh-huh.

- All right, great.

- Bye.

Oh my sweet heaven,

that's your date?

Oh my God,

she's smoking hot.

I'll go out with her

for money.

No no, that's not my date.

My date's right behind you.

Really?

Who's this?

This gentleman is a friend

of mine named Ronnie.

- Hi hi.

- Yeah, say hi.

Nice to meet you.

You're Gerard's...?

- I like.

- Oh, she's...

How much more

for a threesome?

- For a threesome?

- We... I don't think...

Wow, I don't know.

How much is a threesome?

Ha ha! Mm!

Take this off.

Wait wait wait.

Whoa, one sec, one sec.

Sorry, Sandra, I don't...

I don't do it.

You don't do what?

I don't do it.

I don't go all the way.

I'm sorry.

It's nothing personal.

It's more of a professional

thing I have, you know?

Well, how about a dry hump?

What?

- You just sit there.

- No, I know what it is.

I'll do all the work.

Hey, Norah, I've got

a bit of a problem.

You see, there's this really great

band playing this Friday

- at a friend of mine's bar.

- What's the problem?

I haven't figured out a way

to get you to come with me yet.

Look, Jake, I don't

really date my students.

Okay okay, that's fine.

Well, we can go and call it

a student-teacher conference,

you know?

It'll be fun.

I don't know how

to say this politely,

but I really don't date

guys in your line of work.

My line of work?

Yeah, let me guess, you are

a Hollywood something.

Hollywood some...?

No, I'm more of

an entertainment

entrepreneur, you know?

Come on, we'll go out

just for a few drinks.

It'll be great.

What do you say?

Come on.

Okay, fine fine fine,

as a student-teacher, okay?

- A student-teacher?

- Yes.

So her name is Mary

and you're picking her up

at her place.

And she's got the date

all planned.

Okay, please tell me she's

an upgrade from my last client.

Oh, for sure.

She's so much more mature.

Mature? Really?

I can deal with that.

Read 'em and weep, suckers.

Oh, did we win?

I don't understand this game.

Damn right.

I've been taking money

from Dierdra since

the Eisenhower administration.

- She cheated.

- I heard you.

- Good.

- You want a piece of this?

Okay, whoa whoa whoa.

It's not worth it,

okay, Mary? She's not

even in your class.

Did you call my Dierdra

an ass?

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