Bu Er Shen Tan Page #5

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I can throw needles?

I guess people who play

soccer know Kickboxing, too.

She has a really good point.

From the stuffy old

clothes you're wearing...

...and your temper...

I'd say you're

chronically single, right?

What're you talking

about, you catty skank?

Release her!

You bet I Will!

I'm the sergeant here,

and I decide when she goes!

Her lawyer is here,

and she has an alibi.

I know you get me.

Liu Jin Shui.

ID?

Sign here.

All right, you can go.

Jin Shui...

...forgive me...

I just got confused.

I couldn't resist the temptation.

But you're the one I love.

Jin Shui...

...you told me once.

...that the men who date you.

...end up under a curse...

...bad things happen to all of them.

To tell you the truth...

You know I can't quit you...

...after everything these last few months...

I know I can't...

If I can be with you...

I'm not scared of anything.

Marry me.

I'd like a plane ticket,

Hong Kong to Sanya...

...the earliest you have available.

Madam, I just saw

Liu Jin Shui retrieve

Gao Min's belongings.

Is she gone?

Yeah...

...and I heard her booking

a flight out of Hong Kong.

Airport.

Hello Kitty?

Officer Wang, what's the problem?

I need to commandeer your vehicle!

Why?

Because I need to follow that car!

Okay! Get in!

Miss...

...it looks like someone is

trying to get your attention?

That's my husband. He had an

affair while I was pregnant.

That pig! I'll lose him for you.

Miss, your husband seems awfully clingy.

But I have to say I

admire his persistence.

Oh my, Officer Wang, you're incredible!

Take care!

I lost her.

You think of something to stop her.

We can't let her get on that plane!

What? Think of something?

What am I supposed to

think of? How do I stop her?

Have a pleasant journey.

Miss Liu, we'll need

you to come with us.

We have something very

important to discuss with you.

And this is our female

lead, Miss Liu Jin Shui.

Let's give her a round of applause!

Wait, what is this?

We want you to star in a movie.

Since when do the police make movies?

We do! Of course we do.

The Triads funded.

"Young and Dangerous", and after that...

...a lot of people wanted to be gangsters.

As police, we had to answer that...

...so we produced a series

called "Police Story"!

Then "Police Story 2"...

Police Story 3:
Super Cop...

New Police Story...

...and after that, the sixth one...

New New Police Story:

the Beautiful Transformer.

Hey, don't think we're making this up.

We're the ones.

who made Jackie Chan

and Michelle Yeoh famous!

So that was you, the Hong Kong

police, who made them famous?

I'm just asking.

...if you'd like to be

as famous as they are?

Speaking as a Hong Kong

Royal Police sergeant...

...and as a producer...

I'm asking you to make a movie with us.

Wang Bu Er?

You told me to think of

something to keep her here.

Go after her.

Go!

You don't want to be in a leading role?

Shut up...

...it's obviously fake.

C'mon. They're idiots.

They don't see it.

No movie companies in

Hong Kong have the money.

...to put on press conferences these days.

No...

...it's just that.

I know nothing good

could ever happen to me.

There's a place I want to show you.

Look!

Look!

Do you know how cruel their deaths were?

No.

You didn't love them?

No.

How cold-blooded are you?

I don't know who they are.

Oh, sorry.

So, you know these three.

One more and they can

start a Beatles cover band.

Did you love them?

Every one of them proposed to me...

I said yes to every one, and I meant it.

So what do you think?

Do you want to know the

truth of how they died?

Very much.

Let me be number four.

Marry me.

You're crazy.

Hey, it's my first time

proposing in a graveyard...

...so help me out, all right?

For their sake, at the graves

of your exes, say yes... Hey!

"Hainan"

I know I was wrong...

But let's start over, okay?

Give me another chance!

Come on, just marry me already!

Oh shut up!

You know this is cruel, right?

What are you doing here?

Waiting for you.

So you want to marry me?

You want to use a fake marriage with me.

...as bait for the real killer?

As of right now, we're engaged.

Wait, wait, wait...

What are you doing?

If we're acting, let's go all the way.

I brought all my bags.

Who says lovers have to live together?

Lovers have to live together.

For all we know, the real killer

might be watching us right now.

Where?

He can even see me from there?

I'm just kidding, don't be scared.

You're crazy.

Mr. Wang...

...your fiance has finished changing!

Okay, look this way. Now smile, more.

Look over here, smile.

Smile.

Hey.

This necklace, it's gorgeous...

My dad gave it to me years ago.

Seriously, a diamond this size...

...you know it's fake.

Sis?

You guys... Go ahead...

Congratulations!

Morn gave you this

doll for your birthday.

Do you remember?

Of course.

And then you stole it...

...then broke it.

Actually, I kept it...

...and fixed it.

It was your favorite toy...

...how could I throw it away?

Now, it goes back to its owner.

I want you to be happy.

I've said some things that weren't nice.

...because I wanted you to

know what you're up against.

I wanted you to put that dream away.

...and come back to the real world.

Don't blame me for that.

Sis...

...all these years, I've been blaming you.

I was angry at you for

stealing my boyfriends.

I thought you were trying

to take them from me.

But I get it now.

You were trying to see

if they really loved me.

Thank you.

Sis, don't thank me.

I really just wanted your boyfriends.

The Tears of Loneliness.

Stolen from a New York museum in 2002.

It was a legendary heist...

...the Debonair Diamond Hijack.

Get this appraised.

Yes, Sir!

Hey!

"Perfect Robberies-History's

Five Greatest Art Thefts"

Why did you kill them?

Because I like murder!

I killed all five! Happy now?

Don't move!

Uncle Liu...

How're you feeling today?

Where's my cousin?

Why isn't he here?

Uncle Liu...

I'm getting married soon.

Look...

...this is my husband-to-be.

His name is Wang Bu Er.

He's stupid, but kind of cute.

I think I'm going to be happy with him.

Uncle Liu...

we'd like you to be a legal

witness of our wedding.

Your hiding place was almost perfect!

Too bad you met me!

Wang Bu Er?

What are you doing here?

Liu Xing...

...have you actually enjoyed

being in bed for three years?

How can you speak to my uncle like that?

I saw a photo of your father.

...and your uncle together...

...and after I saw the necklace.

...during our wedding photos...

I finally understood.

Your uncle, and your father, were

celebrities a decade ago, master thieves.

who pulled off a heist at the

New York Museum of History!

Your uncle's the one who's been.

...killing all your boyfriends.

That's not true!

My uncle is paralyzed, how could he...

Your first boyfriend

died three years ago...

...at the same time your

uncle was paralyzed.

Pretending to be paralyzed was

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