Bulletproof Monk Page #4

Every race, creed, color

he deems inferior, destroyed.

Total genocide.

If all this insanity is even remotely true,

you should've let me die

and saved the scroll.

I place great value on your life,

but not as much as I place

on the life of the world.

NINA:
Well?

It's a recipe for noodle soup.

Noodle soup?

You may be my granddaughter,

but that will only protect you for so long.

Then where's the scroll?

On my body. In my soul.

I've been running for a long time.

Too many close calls.

The scroll needed to be someplace safe.

So you've been protecting

the scroll for, like, 60 years?

Look at you. You haven't aged one bit.

Whoever is entrusted with the scroll

gains the trust of time.

If you become ill, you will recover.

If injured, you will heal.

He who protects the scroll

is protected by it.

Hello there.

Sorry, but the show's been delayed.

Can I offer you popcorn? On the house.

No, thanks. Health Department.

Hey, hey, hey, I got an A, see?

You have a young man working for you.

He lives here.

You're aware that's a serious violation

of health and safety codes?

I don't know what you're talking about.

Does that jog your memory?

I'm calling the cops, you crazy b*tch.

Oh, I'm not crazy, but I am a b*tch.

Man, if I knew I was gonna pay,

I wouldn't have cabbed it.

Yo, Mr. Kojima.

Well, my boss doesn't seem to be here.

Which means you don't get

to watch me get yelled at.

Bad Girl.

Mr. Kojima!

(SIGHS)

Kar, over here.

I'm sorry, Kar.

I should have never gotten you involved.

I just

You just what?

I had a crazy notion

that maybe you could fulfill a prophecy

once told to me by another old man

before he died.

They are never going to stop

until they get me and the scroll.

Go someplace safe

and forget about all of this.

Goodbye, Kar.

Time to fly.

Monk!

Monk!

Sh*t.

Open up!

(KNOCKING)

Somebody!

Excuse me.

Go away.

Look, I'm sorry if I woke you,

but do you remember me from before?

I was with the monk.

Look

Look, I have to find him.

No, not here.

No!

Stop.

He is a friend.

Hi.

Listen to me, man.

You can't do this alone.

I carry the responsibility

of the scroll on my shoulders,

no one else's.

If I have to carry it another 60 years, I will.

I'll be safe here till the morning.

Then I'm leaving.

What about me?

I'm sorry, Kar,

but this way is better for both of us.

No.

You can't abandon me like this.

Not after everything

you just put me through.

Because now I got nothing.

They're here.

My brothers!

You have to escape.

Escape to where?

Where is he?

Downstairs.

Stop! No!

I'll kill him.

Why?

I don't want to protect the scroll.

I want to read it, take the power.

Even if I have to share it.

Is this your idea of a joke?

Trust me. I'll get us out of the city.

STRUCKER:
My brother monks,

when I finally get my hands

on your brother with no name,

he will, of course, resist my efforts

to secure the location of the scroll.

But with this machine,

I'll torture

the information I need out of him.

And now for a little test.

What?

No! Let me go. What are you doing?

We had a deal!

Did you really think I was going to share

ultimate power with you?

(GROANS)

STRUCKER:
Engage hydro system.

TECH:
Hydro systems engaged.

(RATTLING)

(RUMBLING)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

(SCREAMING)

(BEEPING)

STRUCKER:
Too bad you have

no useful information for me.

Now, find me the monk.

(ENGINE STARTS)

(BOAT HORN BLOWS)

Skipper's cool.

He's gonna take us

right where we want to go.

You all right, man?

Yeah.

(SIGHS)

You led me to the path

I should have chosen.

Thank you, Kar.

Isn't it customary to call a girl

before you show up at her house?

Yeah.

I figured it's in the middle of the night.

If I call her up, she might say,

No way in hell.

If I show up in person,

she's not gonna say no

to my charming face.

You know what, man?

I'm not taking advice about women

from a monk.

I wasn't born a monk. Nobody is.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

(BOAT HORN BLOWS)

(DOGS BARKING)

Hiding here for the night? Bad idea.

You must trust your instincts.

Where could we be safer

than in a house surrounded by guards?

So how we gonna get in, genius?

Why ask me? You are the thief.

(DOG BARKING)

Okay. The two principles of every rip-off

are misdirection and speed.

Misdirection.

(THUDDING)

And speed.

(GASPS)

(EXCLAIMS)

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

The coast is clear. Let's go.

All right.

KAR:
How about a boost?

How about you do this one on your own?

Okay.

(EXHALES)

You okay?

Just checking the distance.

I know. Hurry up.

It's good.

Sure you don't want to do it?

No, I'm fine.

(SIGHS) Okay.

(EXHALES)

You're good.

Check this out.

Oh, sh*t!

Don't say anything.

You feel a little bit dizzy? Do you?

I'm okay.

Good.

You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Very much. Do it.

Yeah.

(EXHALES)

Okay, forget everything

you've ever learned

about how the universe operates.

I can step on the air like a stone,

swim through it like the sea.

All I gotta do is believe.

(EXHALES)

Not bad.

(GRUNTING)

Well, well, well, what do we have here?

Lover of weird insects and deadly reptiles.

(HISSING)

(EXHALES)

Hey, Bad Girl.

Oh, jeez!

Kar, what the hell are you doing here?

Lose this?

I didn't lose it. You stole it.

That's not true.

You're a liar.

Come on. You're a pickpocket.

You expect me to believe that?

I'm the nice guy. I wouldn't steal from you.

You can't lie for sh*t.

I'm a terrific liar.

Okay. I did take it.

But I was just I was borrowing it

so I could give it back.

Look, it was a stupid thing to do, okay?

Sometimes I can be kind of

An a**hole!

I may have lied to you about the necklace,

but I never lied to you about who I am.

You're saying that I did?

Yeah. Look at this place.

I thought you were

from the streets like me,

but it turns out

you're some spoiled little rich girl.

You don't know a damn thing about it.

I think I do.

You kind of liked that, didn't you?

Is this what you want?

(GROANS)

Why are you really here?

I came here

because I thought I could trust you.

That monk, he's got these mystical words

tattooed on his body

that some psycho from World War II needs

in order to take over

the whole goddamn world.

You're crazy!

Kar? Kar, are you okay?

MONK:
He'll be fine.

JADE:
What are you doing here?

That is not the question you need to ask.

Instead, you should be asking yourself

why you run away

from this palace every night

then race back to it each morning.

With all due respect,

please don't tell me

how to live my life, okay?

I'm not telling you how to live your life.

I'm only suggesting you would be happier

living one complete life

instead of two lives that are incomplete.

(GROANS)

Kar.

(GROANS)

Hey. You were right.

I think I should have called first.

I'm sorry.

My life's complicated.

My dad's Ivan Kerensky.

What?

Ivan the Terrible?

(SCOFFS)

You're a Russian mafia princess?

That's perfect.

My name is Jade.

And my dad is serving

So maybe now you understand

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